Well Im 18 and I have a baby and my husband and I are seperated he makes me feel that I am ugly and im worthless and nobody can have me but him and no one will want a woman with a baby.I got married at the tender age of 17.My husband was my everything he hit me a couple times then the next he would say he loves me so much we are 6 years apart and I want to feel wanted again if anyone is interested in telling me there opinions my IM is thismalookin4papi@yahoo.com....I would really appreciate an outsiders help thank you so much...
2007-01-04 14:28:59 · 13 answers · asked by bonitan mami 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I do have an education replying to some of your answers and I am a working mother I work my *** off I get up take care of my child go drop him at daycare and I work 12 to 13 hours so dont make me feel worse then I already do Iam a smart person I just fell in love with my husband and wanted to spend the rest of my lif ewith him I would really appreciate it if you give positive vibes please thank you
2007-01-04 15:08:06 · update #1
start loving yourself and you start loving other people as well, don't wait for a man to start loving you for to feel good.
2007-01-04 14:39:30 · answer #1 · answered by darkangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please go to counseling my dear! He needs some help with his anger and insecurities. It really will work! I am in counseling after being separated for 2 weeks and I love my new outlook on life. I believe in God, I did find a faith based counselor and they will do so much more than just pick you apart. Yes, you are young, but you are not stupid since you haven't filed for divorce yet or given up on your marriage without trying to save it.
Any marriage is worth fixing. Yours can be. He needs help and so do you. Do this together. Are there things that you have done that may cause him to have these destructive behaviors? If yes, then ask yourself why you do it, are you happy or feel guilty afterwards? How will you change it and how will you change it so it becomes part of your life? You can do this. Admit your faults and he will admit to his. Be honest with each other and don't deny or not admit to anything. It's hard, but try to be civil and not attack each other.
I really hope this helps you. Please email or IM me if you need some more advice or just need an ear. Take care!
2007-01-04 14:44:52 · answer #2 · answered by SillyKimmie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, it's all about Sense of Self. If you develop a strong sense of self, nothing anyone thinks or says about you will affect you, because you KNOW in your heart who you are. You know you're better than that. If you don't feel you're quite what you should be, figure out whatever it is that needs to be changed and work on it. Remember, none of us are perfect but then again we don't have to be.
As for letting his opinion of you get you down...hellloooo...dude's got deep seeded issues of his own to deal with. Best to just let that one go.(Loser that he is ...hee hee)
Having a man in your life can be a great thing. A partner to go through life's ups and downs, comfort you when you need it, laugh with you, cry with you, etc. etc. but the big picture is you gotta be happy with who you are without a man. Love yourself and the rest will come naturally. Don't think that a man will solve all your problems and don't think you're not lovable if you don't have a man.
Men are men. They are wired completely different than women and they are not God's gift. Better to live your life, take good care of that baby and shower it with lots of love, be thankful for what you have and love yourself first. If a man comes along (and yes, they do fall in love with women who have kids, I have a friend who has 5 kids and just got remarried) then that's like the icing on the cake. It just makes it that much better, but isn't necessary to be a whole, complete, well rounded, happy person. That, my dear must come from within.
Hope this helps...:-)
2007-01-04 15:19:49 · answer #3 · answered by SammeeGirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course they will. Your husband only says these nasty things to you to lower your self esteem and boost up his male ego. He was abusive, you have just cause to leave him. NO man or woman for that matter could honestly love their partner if they are mentally or physically abusive towards them. He is obviously 23 and still very immature from the sounds of things. You are both so young but perhaps with some form of counseling for his abusive ways you may be able to save your marriage. Do not go back with him unless he admits he has a problem and is willing to fix it or you will spend many years of hell with him. Do you really want that for yourself or your child ?? Take care and stay safe. Best of luck.
2007-01-04 14:44:08 · answer #4 · answered by kazzadanni 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Before you can be loved by someone else you must love yourself. Allow yourself time to heal from this bad relationship. I have been in your shoes and understand alot more than I sometimes care to. LOL I will tell you that life does get better if you allow yourself to heal. I had to learn the hard way. I would rather it be easier for someone else. If you need a friend or just someone to vent to. My email address is daddies_lil_angel62702@yahoo.com. My prayers are with you.
2007-01-04 14:40:06 · answer #5 · answered by daddies_lil_angel62702 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your telling my life story. He makes you feel ugly and worthless because he is scared that he could lose you to someone else. My soon to be ex-husband did that to me. Now I have found someone who tells me I'm beautiful and has lifted up my self-esteem. This new person has no problem with me having a daughter. He tells me "I like you enough to care for you and your daughter". There is someone out there for everyone. Good Luck.
2007-01-04 14:45:47 · answer #6 · answered by Mami-Chula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many young men actaully like an instant family of three. Sopem do not. Look for a group of spearated parents, and you could meet someone. Also, list on craigslist.
2007-01-04 14:33:47 · answer #7 · answered by Legandivori 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really try to worry about your baby. There is time for everything and you WILL meet other people. Look go pamper yourself and do things for yourself. Go to the gym, bike riding,take your baby out.Trust me you will feel a lot better..
2007-01-04 14:42:53 · answer #8 · answered by janu014 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
very few men in your age would actually want a single mom or a family situation, perhaps you should focus on yourself instead of finding someone to be with, normally i would say look me up but i think you may be too young for me
2007-01-04 14:45:29 · answer #9 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it legal to get marrided b4 you turn 18?
2007-01-04 14:40:29 · answer #10 · answered by Diana R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋