Spanking children.?

Question

Has anyone spanked their toddler with success?
By success I mean obedience. We are torn on this issue. Yeah, it works at the time...but there is so much a toddler gets in trouble with that Im not sure if its worth it. We are green in this area..just dont want disobedient children. Are there any parents out there that have used spanking to curb their kids' behaviors? Has it worked or not?

Answer 1

I have used it, too. And it worked, but only as a last resort. It should never be used as a first course of action.

To be honest, it is very hard to "reason" with a toddler. Try it. You will see how well that works. Sure, you can take a toy away, but if they have a gazilion, what good would that do.

Only you know your child, some children can handle an occasional smack, and so can't. It is your call.

Answer 2

I was spanked as a kid. I turned against it in college under the influence of liberal psychology and education professors. In fact from what they said I should be a neurotic mess (I was spanked in the most "dangerous" way--on my bare fanny).

Once I had my own kids I gradually decided that my parents were not so stupid and old fashioned as I had been led to believe. I am now kind of a nutty radical advocate of spanking. I know it sounds stupid and oversimplistic--but I really think that spanking is important.

And I think a lot of younger parents are spanking more. We are just sick and tired of all the spoiled brats and the Nanny 911, etc. nonsenses.

The idea that spanking is ineffective and harmful is a myth. It is something that grew out of the failed no-spanking social experiment starting in the 1950's.

I have actually spent quite a bit of time looking at the spanking research. All the studies finding "it will destroy your child and society" are at best inconclusive and at worst deeply flawed. Yet these are promoted as fact so much by the media and pop psychologists that it is now pretty much taken as fact. Even parents who spank often feel to the need to "only spank as a last resort."

There are actually very good studies that spanking is not only not harmful, but is the best way to get kids to comply with their parent's wishes.

You can see my review of the spanking research and literature at http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-GgIFACYzfqWx8YwvtspSWVmWzA--?cq=1&p=793

Answer 3

Yes I have.
I think it is one of those things that needs to be used in moderation and needs to be followed throught with age appropiate conversation that makes the chid understand why he/she got the spanking. For a toddler that would be a short to the point simple explanation.
But spanking or any other type of punishment needs to be consistent. I think thats where it fails. I have seen some become immune to spankings because they were used so much at the wrong time. Punishment at any form needs to be immediate and followed through with accuracy.
And dont do that counting crap...like "I will give you to the count of 3...1, 2, 2 and 1/2...Im almost at 3...2..3" because kids just learn how to play that game and its annoying.
I have had to spank my kids few times and as they got older it faded out all together.They got automatic spankings for certain things such as lying.

Answer 4

I have found that a lot of my friends that used spanking on a regular basis for punishment, their toddlers were quit hurtful to other children.
I am not against smacking I just think it should be reserved for more important times eg. If your child is endangering themselves by running across the road.
I think taking something off them that is important to them for a period of time works better.

Good luck I know this is not an easy on, what works for one child might not necessarily work on another.

Answer 5

My son is so sensitive, that the word no will make him cry. I try not to say it very much. My daughter who has been punished for about everything you can think for and every normal punishment but it doesn't work on her. But I found out she had some delays, some disorders. It's probably why. I don't need to spank my kids, just raising my voice make them know I'm boss. My daughter sure hates the corner. I believe the type of punishment you use on your kid has to do with how much education you have. I know the higher the education the less physical the punishment.

Another thing in the military it's considered abuse to spank your child. My hubby gave a guy an article 15 for spanking his kid in public

Answer 6

Hitting your children just makes them fear you. Physical abuse is no way to punish a kid. ANd like someone else said, I see it also as bullying. You're the adult, you're older, you're bigger, you're stronger. How do you think they feel being hit by someone older, bigger, and stronger, knowing that they have no control whatsoever over their physical body? People don't allow men to hit women, or even men to hit other men and women to hit other women, so why should children be the only exception? They're people too, they have rights.

Take away something s/he likes or put them in a time out or something. My parents spanked me, 99% of the time it was my dad, and honestly (I'm 17 now) I get anxious when I'm even in the same room with him, I get so anxious and paranoid that usually I just don't move until he leaves out of fear of doing something wrong. I know he wouldn't do it now, I'm too old for that, but it really instills fear, and your children might be obedient but not for the right reasons.

You want them to respect, not fear, you.

Answer 7

I work with kids for a living (after school program, and substitute teacher). I was raised in a spanking family, so I thought that was the main way to enforce the rules. But we can't spank them where I work (obviously), so I have found other great ways (better ways) to enforce behavior. I will not carry on the spanking tradition with my kids.

EDIT-- Wow. With all the liberals and hippies on this site, I thought my answer would surely get a thumbs up. I'm discouraging spanking here. I said there are better ways of enforcing positive behavior. And this is coming from a pretty conservative guy here.

Answer 8

There's a time & place for it. In all honesty the first time I smacked my toddler was within seconds of her bitting me.

As far as I am concerned the only time is immediately after the insult. You can't even waiting a few minutes as their attention spand is so short.

Answer 9

It worked with all the kids in my family. I was spanked, as were my brothers and sister. we all grew up to be obedient kids and teens. my parents trust my brother and I very much as teens, we have driven to the mountians twice for teen evens and never did any thing at all that would cause our parents not to trust us. infact this summer i might be gone, on my own for 3 weeks. I thank my parents for spanking me, and i plan to spank my kids.

Answer 10

A toddler should not be spanked. There are many pro active strategies that a parent can implement to avoid many unwanted behaviors.