why people think being funny is not funny?

Question

I found people attract to me very easily...but later they find my being funny not that funny and try to avoid me....

How do I keep the people I get.... I dont know once I have a friend I try to totally open myself up...but it does not work.........

I dont know I just lose respect.... I want to maintain the same respect level in their eyes.

I am tired of people doing that to me.... I feel so lonely....as I know the person next to me will be hiding from me.....

Answer 1

Hmmm, I was discussing this very topic in therapy...

My basic issue is that I tend to "entertain" (comes from a childhood where my parents would totally ignore me if I wasn't fascinating and humorous and charming and full of trivia facts.)

But, I get stressed out entertaining so much, and then I resent the feeling that I NEED to entertain, and then I think, well, maybe I don't need to entertain so much, and then people are like, hey, why are you so...down? Are you depressed? Why are you moping?

It hurts to be wanted for what you DO, not who you ARE. And that's the trap you fall in when you're a relationship entertainer. At some point, all the entertainment just grinds you down and you want to be alone or at least settle down the whole charade, and then people resent you or you THINK they resent you...and you try to entertain to get them back. It's a nasty, vicious cycle.

I truly love entertaining, but it's one thing to entertain for a living, and another to entertain in relationships. Like, have you ever seen, say, Inside the Actors Studio? Have you noticed how incredibly different some actors are when they're "off", that is, they're not working? It's amazing.

They're quiet, humble, much less dramatic. It's a bit of a shock sometimes to see the working actor and then the actor offstage.

That's the same issue you're dealing with. Me too.

Just try to relax...relax. Do things that interest you and when the urge to be super-funny washes over you, try to just be a normal amount of funny. You're getting in a rut where you put way too much into a relationship in the beginning, people grow to expect it, and they get confused and resentful when you stop putting in so much effort. A friendship is between TWO people--you have to give other people a chance to input some into the relationship.

Don't make it all about what you can DO--make it about who you ARE and what the two of you do TOGETHER.

Answer 2

It's okay to be funny every once in a while. Trying to be funny ALL the time is annoying and gets old quickly. Perhaps you are going over the top and instead of coming across as amusing, you coming across as the "king of corn". Ease off the laughs and see what happens.

Answer 3

You may be annoying -some people hate annoying and if you try to hard to be funny that's usually annoying--Just be a good person-and friend or two will ensue

Answer 4

reserve the full self-disclosure until you've established a good repoire with people. they probably feel overwhelmed when you open up too much too soon.

Answer 5

PEOPLE FIND ME ATTRACED TO ME TO. BUT ONLY BECAUSE IM FAMUS SO I DONT KNO




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