Today is my fiance's B-DAY. We don't have a lot of extra cash bc of X-mas so I got him a $50 gift card to ITUNES, made him pancakes this morning and I was going to make him his favorite dinner and get a cake. I thought I was making the day as special has I could, bc it's my job to make him happy, right? Well he barely ate the pancakes. He gets free music off the internet, so the the gift was a waste. His mom called and said she wanted to take him to dinner AND BRING A CAKE! ( so thats what we are doing now)So everything that I tried to do today failed misrably and I just really got my feelings hurt. I'm not going to say anything becuase well it's his birthday, and that wouldn't be right, but can you tell wouldn't you be upset?
2007-01-04 10:10:15 · 36 answers · asked by lizzy*lou 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Nah,,,, it takes a lot more than that to get me upset. If he didn't like the pancakes, I wouldn't make them again, and I'd have already figured it out that the Itunes were already available. Next year, ask him what he wants, then get that. If he says "nothing" then get him nothing, just as he requested..... just a nice card.... $1.25. Don't hold a grudge, he has no idea what he did wrong, if anything..... Two things really kill a marriage---resentment and betrayal. remember that
2007-01-04 10:19:06 · answer #1 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would probably be upset...first. Then after I thought about it, I'd change my attitude because it is HIS birthday. What you could have done was 'coordinate" your efforts perhaps with his mom and you would have avoided the cake issue. But you know what, hind site is 20-20 they say. You could have played a game of scavenger hunt with him. You could have little cards all over the house telling him to do or get certain things and then top it off with something extra special between the two of you. Don't feel badly. Just start thinking on another level. (you could have asked your Yahoo friends for ideas - smile) What special did you do to the pancakes? Did you dress up the plate - put out the good silver? Real napkins - could have made a paper crown and placed it on his head - with a card saying 'whatever he wanted for the day was his and you were the only one who could grant him every request." I mean, there was a lot you could have done. But dont' sweat it. Talk to him later, softly and lovingly when you're alone and let him know how special he is to you - and that you wanted to do more for his birthday. Hold his hands, look into his eyes - and let nature take its course. He probably didn't give it a thought. Women are the only ones who trip for a year over something like this. "man up" (smile) At least you have a fiance' (smile)
2007-01-04 10:17:26 · answer #2 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You certainly have the right to be upset. Not at him or his mom (they didn't do anything wrong) but frustrated that you tried to do something special and it didn't turn out the way you wanted.
And that's what you should talk to him about and tell him. Just in those words. "I wanted to do something really special for you but it didn't turn out the way I wanted. I feel really frustrated".
And then he will see what you did not as an extra cake and a gift card he didn't need but as a lot of work on your part to make the day special.
And that's the best gift a guy could receive.
2007-01-04 10:17:19 · answer #3 · answered by clueless_nerd 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right, today is not the right time to let him know you are upset. Because you will come out wrong, but find the right time and let him know how you felt. Trust me, talking from experience you should never let the little things like this just fly and pretend its not a problem, because later on they become even bigger things and you just dont know how to deal with it anymore. If you want a happy marriage, dont fool yourself into thinking things will turn out fine on there own. You have to make it fine for yourself, always remember that, and tell him although his mom might have his best interest at heart, she should maybe check the day before to see if you guys dont have plans before she makes some of her own. Never go silent and hold it in, a lesson learned the hard way.....
2007-01-04 10:20:21 · answer #4 · answered by beygrl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can understand why you are upset... I know I would be feeling the very same way. It wasn't fair of your boyfriend to act that way towards you... just one thing.. did you know he downloaded music for free off the internet? If so, the blame is on you for the iTunes card, you could've used the $50 for something else to get him. As for dinner with his mom and a cake... thats just not fair to you. I would say something, regardless of its his birthday or not. Don't let him walk on you. I've been there.. its not healthy.
2007-01-04 10:39:48 · answer #5 · answered by Mommy-To-Be 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can make him his special dinner tomorrow night and explain that you planned to do that on his birthday but then the plans got changed at the last minute when his mom wanted to take him out to dinner. It's the thought that counts and what you planned was really sweet. It's understandable that you're feeling the way you do.
2007-01-04 10:15:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are the classic queen bee female personality. You have no reason to be upset, but you creatively come up with problems.
Just smile and have fun with your bf. I mean, if I were your bf, I wouldn't want your difficulty in imperfection to ruin my special day. Just kiss him and make his day easy.
Personally, I think you should be that way all the time unless he really does something careless like insult you for no reason, hit you, insult your family, break things, or randomly runs over cats.
Save your emotions for something real damaging.
Don't let little, petty things turn your beautiful world into a firey hell.
You're too pretty to be so upset so easily. OK? Promise me to tone it down a bit?
2007-01-04 10:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by Tones 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think that you have a right to be upset; however, did your fiance know that you were going to make him his favorite dinner and get him a cake? If he did not know, this really isn't his fault; however, if he did know, he should have told his mother what you were going to do and asked her if you all could go out to dinner on another night. I'm sorry that you have had such a bad day.
2007-01-04 10:35:01 · answer #8 · answered by earthling 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure I can understand that your feelings were hurt but it sounds like you 2 are going to have a great dinner anyway. And sounds like you put alot of thought into his day, so try not to let it get you down. Seems like your a very special girlfriend and im sure he apprecaites you more then he lets on
2007-01-04 10:29:04 · answer #9 · answered by shorty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already have given his present. Is the thought that counts. The caring you took to make sure his day started out right shows how much you care for him. Tonight do something and give him something that NO ONE can give him. Make it special ... a night to remember. Good Luck
2007-01-04 10:16:24 · answer #10 · answered by ppv918 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋