What do you do when you are in need of a friend?

Question

I guess when I say this, I mean it seems that those you regard as your closest friends are sometimes not interested, or rather they don't have the time in the day for you. And I say this because I do honestly feel that I do get the 'cold shoulder', as it were, or ignored if you like. Why do people do that? It's something I don't do, and would never do - it's just too sh1tty a thing to do.

I don't have many friends, so those I do have I value a lot. And well, the question here is: What do you do when you are in need of a friend? I'm sad to say that I throw myself into work rather reluctantly, but it does numb the pain, I guess. Can anyone help? I'm interested in what people think.

Thank you for reading / bothering to answer my question - I appreciate it. I'm being serious here, so to this end, if you could, pleas leave serious answers!! : )

Best wishes to you.....

Wow....these are all great answers, and in all sincerity are wonderful. Each one offers something so helpful in many ways. Thank you, I do appreciate it. Please do take care, and all the best to you all : )

How do I start to pick the 'Best Answer'? They're all great answers, and I can't thank you all enough. I'd like to say I knew some of this already, but you've guys have weighed it all up : )

--> Goldenrain...you're a star. Like yourself, I love my mother to pieces and will be doing the same from now on. You keep up the good work, and I wish you the very best to you and your mother. Thank you for the kind words : )

--> St4rdust3r and JO A...you are both very sweet, and speak a lot truth, and putting it so well...((hug))

--> brich_inc and jenkins1950....a big thank you to you both and God bless you. I mean that and I am truly thankful to you both. You guys are two very good people : )

Answer 1

I could have written your question myself. I too experience this with my group of friends. I have no family in the town I live in so rely on my friends for support. However, I get the same treatment from them that you do from yours. I can't say for sure why I think they act this way. Perhaps they are immature or self-serving and don't realize what they are doing to us. I do know that none of my friends would like to be in this position. It makes you feel like you have no value, but you know you do.

You know this will pass. Life evolves, and new people come into your life. It may sound cliche, but to help this process along and keep up your spirits, you should look into an activity or hobby that would interest you. Join a gym, sign up for a class, volunteer for a good cause. Exercise, helping others, or getting involved in activity you enjoy will improve your mood and allow you to meet new people with similar interests and values.

Finally, remember that someone like you who values a good friend and knows how to treat one properly deserves to have many. I wish you luck.

Answer 2

I know what you mean.Right now i'm going trough the same thing.I am feeling misunderstood and unappreciated.I also have few true friends but we don't have many common interests.I guess studying or working can ease the pain or you can try fantasizing a dream realm of your own.I've always escaped in my own world(i have a few actually which i am improving trough the years).But the thing i am doing right no is looking for friends on the Internet.So far i have found 1-2.But it really helps because you have a bigger selection on the web and you can find really cool and nice people with similar interests(that's very important).Hope this helps.BTW you can write to me anytime for everything just write something in the subject by which i can recognize you.

Answer 3

Do you know I thought I knew the answer to that, but once I started typing I became unsure! I always seem to be the shoulder to cry on and unload problems onto, a bit like an agony aunt and I don't mind this at all.

The thing is I don't remember going to a friend with a problem, I don't think it is because I don't have any, (problems that is) i think it is because I just keep things to myself and sort them out in my own mind. I think alot of the time you know what you should do with a problem and some people just need to get it confirmed by another.

I hope that if I ever do have big problem that I need help with, my friends will be there for me. I guess you don't know who your true friends are until you really need them.

Answer 4

Aww bless you, all my friends disappeared when I had a baby so I don't think they were really my friends in the first place. With me, my friends are only there when they are single and have nothing better to do! aww I feel bad now, lol. I wouldn't worry though, fromwhat I can see you haven't answered that many questions but you have 37% best answers! that's an acievment and people obviously like you and value your opinions. You're obviously someone who would be good to have as a friend x love pocoyo by the way

Answer 5

I don't have any friends (such as people to do stuff with, call up, etc.) except I talk to my mother alot and make friends with the people I work with which is at work only; I like to spend my time alone when I am not working (which is with people).

So, I call my mother and I also write in a journal to express myself or take my mom's labrador on an outing and spend time with her or talk to a friend at work.

You sound like a very nice person, by the way.

Answer 6

I am a shoulder to cry on ... I have a schizophrenic brother, an autistic daughter, I have been sectioned with mental illness, I now work with elderly Alzheimers residents in a care home, I am 56, I support a suicidal gay friend, I work for the Samaritans (not supposed to tell you that), I nursed my mother through 4 years of cancer, then I looked after my gran and her elderly sister for another 7 years until they died ... I will try to look after you. I have years of experience. XXX.

Answer 7

I can understand, look for friends that are understanding, people who are intelligent & loving. I have a few friends I value highly & they listen to me but they don't understand where I'm comining from. They give advice & it's good advice sometimes but sometimes I want to really TELL someone & can't always bear to burden them with my problems. I guess the best friend we have is always God & although we can't see Him or hear Him we know he's there or someone is there listening. imagine God as a best friend & talk to Him as so & see if you feel any different.
with luv

Answer 8

First don't think they don't have time for, maybe it's just you need to make the call first, call them, invite them to your place when you think it's best time for friendship.or them. Or try making new friend at work, but open your life to new opportunities

Answer 9

my friends do the same, but just kepe them as friends, but if they dont bother with you, i wouldnt bother as much with them, and then theyll soon realise how much u mean to them when they fancy a chat or whatever....in the meantime, watch bridget joens n a tub of ben n jerrys cookie dough ice cream....lovely! lol x

Answer 10

Having the same experience. I am really appreciating the responses. They have been very helpful to me as well. Thanks to Everyone for Caring