My boyfriend of a year is a good all around guy, but there are some problems. I have severe depression, and right now he's just making it worse! It seems like he just doesn't want to spend time with me anymore. He's home during the day and I'm in school. The second school lets out I'm so eager to see him, but he high tails it out the door and goes over to his buddy's house. We got in a big fight today because I had a really bad day. I just wanted to come home and see him, but instead he invited his friend over to our house. I broke down and told him my depression's really bad; I don't want people around I just wanna spend time with you! So what does he do? Goes to his friend's instead. Am I being unreasonable by throwing such a fit over him going to a friends? Or do you think I have a right to feel upset?
2007-01-04 09:32:42 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Most people don't want to be around a "partty pooper". Would you want to spend all day around someone who just complanes about there life and all the crap that goes on? Depression can be a hard thing and its hard to find a person to deal with it. But the truth is you have to deal with it first. You need to get help and get one some sort of medication that can help you. The fact that your boyfriend does not want to be around you does not make him a jurk it just makes him normal. Chances are if you find a best friend and act like this all the time she wont want to hang out with you eather. People want to have a fun life when they don't want to be around someone who is just going to bring them down. Try going to see a concaler after school or at lunch and tell them about your problums. Then when you go to your boyfriend make sure you don't bring them up every minutes of your time togeather. If you don't cheer up you could lose him....
I've had a few friends like you and to tell you the truth I really don't like spending time with them (I don't care what anyone says thats not mean of me). I've also been down at times and I get that way and I notice people not wanting to be around me, so I make myself get over my probs and move on.
When I'm really down I write in a notebook. Wite a letter to your boyfriend or anyone and just don't send it. It helps you get everything out and you really will feel good at the end. I did that and ever since I finished it I felt GREAT!!!
2007-01-04 10:03:28 · answer #1 · answered by dohm84 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not to be insensitive but maybe your depression has a negative effect on him and that's why he seeks to get out of the house. I hate to say that because I do understand and I feel bad for you.
Our partners are not meant to be our everything, and they aren't meant to serve as therapist or psychologist either. You need to get you someone you can talk to on a one on one basis and take some burden off your lover. You really don't want to pull him down or drag the relationship down. It will only make your depression worse if your relationship falls apart right now.
Really try to back off some... I know you need some support and it would be great if he would give a little more, but don't stress over it.
Best of luck and I hope you feel better soon.
2007-01-04 17:44:27 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer M 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down and have a good talk with your boyfriend. Communication is key in any relationship, and it appears you have none. You need to be on the same page as far as each other's needs and desires. You should be there for each other, and want to help each other.
You need to be equally concerned about his as you are yours. Is he usually like this or is something bothering him?
And if he just doesn't want to talk, you should really re-evaluate what exactly it is you are getting out of this relationship. There is no reason to stay in a dead end relationship just because you've been together for a year.
2007-01-04 17:47:21 · answer #3 · answered by IamBatman 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hellz ya you have a reason to feel upset. Is it bad just to wanna spend time with him no. It is pretty dumb of him to ignore what you are going through.
2007-01-04 17:39:08 · answer #4 · answered by ¤ஐ*T£@§£*ஐ¤ 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sorry girl, but truth be told, nobody wants to be around a depressive.
Until you learn to love yourself, you can't expect for anyone else to do it for you...
That's real.
2007-01-04 17:42:36 · answer #5 · answered by Sethco 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋