He lies to me about absolutely everything, he'll say he's not sleeping in between snores, I can hear him drink out of the milk jug and then denies it. He says he's going to the store and comes back half an hour later with nothing, he says he paid the bill and then I get one in the mail 2 weeks later double the amount of the one before, and he says THEY are the ones lying! He'll say he did something alone, and then the person he was with will bring it up later and prove him wrong. I can't believe anything the guy says! It's really driving me nuts, I'm losing all trust in him. If I started lying about all the stupid stuff he lies about, how long would it take him to notice, and would the truth consequently become more important to him?He likes the fact that I don't lie to him, but I can't take this anymore. Any ideas would be welcome.
2007-01-04 07:42:06 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He also lies about his friends, like whether or not they even exist-he knows about 12 people who I have never met. He hides all his phone calls, he hides all the stuff he consideres to be valuable, like he's afraid of being ripped off all the time, and this has all been going on for 5 years. I've told him I can't have a relationship with someone I can't even hold a civil conversation with, but he'll just smash holes in the walls and refuses to leave.
2007-01-04 08:08:02 · update #1
Ugh!!! I wish I'd read this question before the one where you're trying to figure out men. There I advised reconnecting with him; now I see that I need to give the opposite advice.
This isn't a normal man, and he's so definitely wrong for you that he's not worth any effort at all - except the effort to find your own place, get your stuff out, and get a lawyer.
You'll be very happy you did.
Now I understand the part in your other question about the "feelings discussions" too. With this guy, he's so insecure and guarded that you have ZERO chance of getting in. This guy is broken. You need to send him back.
2007-01-04 09:19:38 · answer #1 · answered by SoCalSkierGuy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a pathelogical liar. Guess he can never tell the truth and dont you deserve the truth? Trust is a major part of any relationship and you are losing it. It takes a long time to get it back. As you sit there and let him destroy it, think about what is best for you. He likes that you dont lie then he should follow the example. Communication is the only way I can see you even possibly saving this. Talk to him about it and if it dont change, well you know you dont lie so walk away. Good luck!
2007-01-04 15:48:23 · answer #2 · answered by sweetlaughter434 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't start lying. It won't change the fact that he lies. And lying will just get you in trouble that you don't need or want. Sounds to me like he is on drugs what with all the lies and his being so possessive with his belongings. Like he wants to make sure he has them when he has no money so that he can sell them. I may be wrong and if I am I apologize. (About the drugs)
2007-01-04 16:28:16 · answer #3 · answered by ctsnowmiss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stoop to his level and start lying just to get his attention. You know what, he probably won't even notice...AND, I have a sneaky suspicion that if he did notice something, he would turn the tables on you and start accusing you of the many different things that he is probably already doing. He will project his guilty feeling on to you to make himself feel better. You will only feel worse, and will continue to see that his destructive behavior is doing no good and is ruining your relationship. I would bail on that mess. He clearly isn't trustworthy.
2007-01-04 19:28:43 · answer #4 · answered by catchernkeeper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a relationship what do you have if you do have trust? Confront him and try to find out why so many lies. You will never have peace otherwise. Sorry
2007-01-04 15:48:02 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you cant be with someone when there is no trust. I have a friend whose husband does that, he tried to drag me into it once saying 'oh remember the time we did this?' trying to sound cool. I replied 'that never happened and shot him down. but she got hurt by it every single time, and i dont think thats a good place to be, tell him that if he cant be honest with you then you cant be with him
2007-01-04 15:47:49 · answer #6 · answered by jacks my boy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe you already.
Sorry. Just kidding.
You guys need to see a marriage counsellor pronto. And he needs a psychiatrist. Maybe he can be helped?
He has a serious problem. Just getting mad at him or getting even won't help. HE needs help, not lectures.
I am not saying what he is doing is OK. It will wreck your marriage. But just telling him he sucks isn't going to fix it.
2007-01-04 15:45:32 · answer #7 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a compulsive liar hon. If your married, and still love him, seek serious counseling, FOR HIM. If you turn around and lie about everything like he does it doesn't make it the right thing...your just being childish. If your not married, kick his *** to the curb! He needs help!
2007-01-04 15:46:35 · answer #8 · answered by msjinx39 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's wacked. Leave him. He lie's to cover a lie. He doesn't know the truth any longer. Save yourself and move on.
2007-01-04 15:47:39 · answer #9 · answered by mvas800 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave him
2007-01-04 15:46:57 · answer #10 · answered by goodtimefriend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋