anyone tired of being married?

Question

i was married when i was 19, and it was by choice. we didn't have kids until two years later. it is now 12 years later. i love my wife, but i don't feel that LOVE. we don't really argue or anything. i catch myself looking at other women and wanting to tallk to them. i consider myself content but not happy. theres more to the story, but don't want to get into it on here. plz don't bash me , just lookin for some input

Answer 1

that is normal
imagine having to eat pizza every day for the rest of your life.
rountines after 12 years get old
your feelings are normal
what you do about them makes all the difference.
try to do new things with your wife and re examine the reasons that you feel in love with her in the first place
good luck!

Answer 2

Your feelings are normal. Every couple feel this way once and while. But what you are going to do is the solution. You have to try to work it out with her. Try try and try. If after all the efforts it does not work, at least you know you gave your best. you said there is more to the story, but whatever the problems are, can the problems be fixed? Have you tryed to talk to her, or try some counseling, that might help. Also get out of the routine, maybe have a second honey moon........... Spice things up. Of course after 12 years and children things change. A lot of responsabilities and not so much romance. 12 years is a long time. If you feel the solution is end the relationship, try to work it out before get to this conclusion.
On he other hand, try to put yourself on her shoes. How does she feel? Does she still LOVES you? What does she think about the situation. Is only you that feel this way or she feels the same too. What could be the source of the frustrations. Sometimes women do things because they are frustrated and they do not feel appreciated. My friend try to see what can be done. My best wishes for you and her.

Answer 3

No bashing is necessary. What you are going through is natural. It happens to almost all couples. The secret is doing something about it! Go see a marriage counselor. They can help you work through your frustrations and find acceptable strategies for putting the spark back into your relationship. It CAN be done! But it takes work, and it takes work from BOTH sides. That is why the counselor is such a good idea. A professional mediator will help you both to work together in preserving and improving your marriage, and help you keep from getting into a fight. It might also be necessary to resolve the "other issues" you are referring to. You want some constructive discussion here. 12 years is a long time. You don't want it to go to waste. That said, you do not want 12 more years if you are unhappy. Sit down with your wife and discuss your feelings, and convince her to get the counseling. It will make a big difference, and if not...well, then you'll KNOW that it is time to move on. Good luck!

Answer 4

Love is not a verb, it is an action. You don't "feel love".

here is some raw facts, if you are not doing things to make love happen it doesn't.

I always defer to one of my favorite Clint Black songs,

It's something that WE do (operative word WE!!)

I remember well the day we wed
I can see that picture in my head
I still believe the words we said
Forever will ring true
Love is certain, love is kind
Love is yours and love is mine
But it isn't something that we find
It's something that we do
It's holding tight, lettin' go
It's flying high and laying low
Let your strongest feelings show
And your weakness, too
It's a little and a lot to ask
An endless and a welcome task
Love isn't something that we have
It's something that we do
We help to make each other all that we can be
Though we can find our strength and inspiration independently
The way we work together is what sets our love apart
So closely that you can't tell where I end and where you start
It gives me heart remembering how
We started with a simple vow
There's so much to look back on now
Still it feels brand-new
We're on a road that has no end
And each day we begin again
Love's not just something that we're in
It's something that we do
We help to make each other all that we can be
Though we can find our strength and inspiration independently
The way we work together is what sets our love apart
So closely that you can't tell where I end and where you start
Love is wide, love is long
Love is deep and love is strong
Love is why I love this song
And I hope you love it too
I remember well the day we wed
I can see that picture in my head
Love isn't just those words we said
It's something that we do
There's no request too big or small
We give ourselves, we give our all
Love isn't someplace that we fall
It's something that we do

Answer 5

I'm SO sick of being married to a man I no longer love (19 yrs). Alot of people younger than 35 seem to be in la la land when it comes to questions like this. They don't have a clue what its like to be stuck with ONE person even after they change in sucha way, nothing short of a labotomy could allow you to stay. Your looking at other women because your not happy babe. You still love your wife, because it is out of habit being together so long. Yes, thats what it is folks. Its called a rut, and once your in it, someone has to leave. Staying for the "kids sake" is bs. Mine ended up so torn up from our stormy crappy marriage neither of them ever wanna get married. So this business of "for the kids" is not true. If your not happy, get out now, because I'm telling you from experience, your feelings won't change. You will continue on this roller coaster until you end up treating each other badly. Its not worth it. I'd be happy to talk to you if you wish....take care and good luck.

Answer 6

You might try and figure out what would make you happy. Better sex life, more dates, etc. See if your wife feels the same way. You might consider counseling together too. I think every couple goes through a point where they get sick of the routine. They either spice it up or drift apart. Good luck to ya.

Answer 7

you have 2 choices
move on- end it neatly and amicably

spice up ur marriage- i do belive that all marriages reach this point at some time or another. what i would recommend is that you spice up your marriage. remember how and why you fell inlove in the first place.

it's because you have the wife, home, children routine down pat. shake it up a bit by being spontaneous. instead of homecooking, go out for dinner, etc.

don't feel badly. it takes two to tango so literally tango.

Answer 8

Sounds pretty natural to me, but the "more to the story" line kind of throws me off. It sounds like to me you need to spice things up. To do that, I'd talk to your wife and see if she feels the same way. Good luck to you.

Answer 9

Are you interested in putting the spark back in your marriage or to move on???

If you are happy in your relationship, but need something extra, ask your wife about making the relationship open, so both of you can get some fun outside the marital home...

Answer 10

feels like he did not locate it exciting to %. up his grimy clothing off the floor. and he discovered being together with his neighbor extra relaxing than you. in line with risk you're nitpicking way too a lot. purely go away the clothing on the floor...if he needs them washed as some factor...he can positioned them interior the abate