Do you get more respect from being loved or feared?

Question

Why is it easier for most people to act like a tyrant than to be loving? Aren't we suppose to act more like God which is to turn the other cheek? What do you think?

Another view, if it's better to be loved than feared why do so many parents think it's okay to spank their kids? Is their any love there or is it tyrrany in the home?

Answer 1

Some people just act like tyrants because they have not been taught different, because maybe nobody has ever been kind to them or something bad has happened to them that made them close their hearts to the world. Like you said, turn the other cheek, but don't keep your face down! Do something for them, a small act of kindness, something to make them happy. Maybe they just need someone to talk to. And do this for everyone, not just those you fear, or just those you love, but everyone. Start off by doing 5 acts of kindness a day. Then increase it to ten, then twenty! However high you want. Most of these people are just misguided; they need a loving hand to turn them in the right direction. You can make a huge difference in anyone's life just by showing them a little love. That will go a long way further than fear in matters of trust and respect. Christ showed us this. Follow his example.
-Zeldafreak

Answer 2

We are all human, and sometimes we just plumb run out of cheeks for people to hit, metaphorically speaking.
Respect and love are not the same. I respect sharks, I do not swim with them.
Being a tyrant without justification does not earn respect. Though you many not like a person, you may respect them and their opinion and realize that while you may never rack up a game of pool together, you could easily work for this person, because you respect them and their opinions.

Above all things, respect, like love, is a thing to be earned. Bullies garner no respect, the louder and more obnoxious they are, the deafer people around them become.

Love always is the better part of valor. As for the parenting thing, discipline IS love. Too many parents either want to be buddies with their children, or are too lazy to do the hard work of raising decent human beings. We have far too many permissive, lazy parents. Spanking is the last resort, but a good one, when explaining, and asking sternly for good behavior has fallen on deaf ears. Spanking and removing a child from a room for bad behavior tells the child that rudeness and cruelty are not acceptable.
This too is love. Being a tough parent is a thankless job and the most loving job, because you must learn to balance discipline with a lot of hugs, kisses and laughter and support. You must learn to pick your battles with your child, when to yell, and when to listen, and being honest, no matter what. Rules and consistency make children feel secure no matter what the age, even when they don't agree with the rules, they at least know someone cared enough for their well being to create some ground rules and enforce them. Parents are never popular people, until their children grow up and become parents themselves and realize just how much they were loved.

Answer 3

When people act out of tyranny, it's about having power over others. They use some facet in your life or many others and manipulate it into an agent to control you or a group of people. Once they have you, then they have you or the group doing things you never thought you'd ever do. However the consequences for failures usually results in pain or death. And the favoured among the tyrants can easily be replaced the next day or even hour. Tyrants also make sure they have total control over your worldly life and try to crush your spirituality so that you never question their motives. In a nutshell (no pun intended), love is never proponent for respect towards a dictator, so otherwise you show respect to the tyrant or die.

But when you have people who act as well as they can as Christ and love those as Jesus loves the church, the respect is much more genuine and real.

Answer 4

I think it can depend on the relationship.But for the most part love will get a lot more respect.There are people in Canada who have little busts of J.F.K for crying out loud .He wasn't even the leader of this country ! Now that's someone who was well loved and respected.How many people respect Hitler ?Not too many I think .

Answer 5

I believe most of our shortcomings as humans come down to selfishness. Perhaps this is from some primitive survival instinct. True love is the most selfless of acts. Thus its easier, and most instinctive, for us to get mad, and to puff up. To open ourselves up and give with no thought of something in return, as true love requires well that's just plain hard.

You get more respect from love than fear. Love requires more effort.

Answer 6

You probably get more respect by being feared, but it is not the type of respect loved ones get. It is much better to be loved.

Answer 7

you get more respect from being loved....


But, you seem to be ignoring a few of God's teachings:

1> if a man does not have a sword, he should turn a plow sheer into a sword
2> God quite clearly points out the difference between murder and killing - he teaches "though shall not MURDER."
3> God urges people to defend him/her self. If your attacher dies as a result, this is not murder, thus not a sin.

Answer 8

God doesn't always turn the other cheek, just look what he did when eve ate the forbidden fruit!

That aside, I respect people I love....I don't know what most people respect though!

Answer 9

Without a doubt when you are loved. Respect you receive when you're feared is dressed-up respect, sure you get that respect, but is it truly respect when it's not genuine?

Answer 10

I don't think respect comes from FEAR, and if you truly want to be respected you must meet each person on their level. It's not about LOVE either, it's about connecting to that person using their beliefs and on their level.