My husband is very strict and when i upset him sometimes he hit me
But after he thinks i got abortion he stopped hitting me and i am very happy
Two weeks ago he took me to a clinic and tried to make me get a abortion there and i lied and said i had one
I have to tell him soon because i am starting to show and my clothes are not fitting anymore
He want a son not a girl that is why he said have abortion
I am from Baghdad and moved to the United States 7 months ago and i have no one here for advice and i am really scared what should i do to tell him so he is not mad at me again
2007-01-04 03:34:06 · 23 answers · asked by Mira 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
first, you need to leave him and call the cops for protection from him. He cannot make you abort a child. your body your decision. Get help, don't let him do this to you and your child. Good Luck
2007-01-04 03:36:53 · answer #1 · answered by sshhmmee2000 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I understand that this is going to be hard for you. I don't know if it is okay for men to hit women in Baghdad, but in America it is NOT okay. Before you tell him, you should find out where your local police station is. If he starts to hit you, you should go there, or call 9-1-1. If he still is mean to you, you should go to a battered womans shelter where people will help you, and your baby. You need to remember that the most important thing right now is your baby. I know that this really isn't the answer that you wanted. Sorry.
2007-01-04 03:48:30 · answer #2 · answered by princess kiki 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in America now, so you have all your rights as a woman. You need to tell him, and if he does not accept the fact that you dont want to abort a part of you and him, then maybe he is not the ideal father for your child. He should not be hitting you either! I know you guys probably have a different heritage and different values when it comes to marriage, but if his personal wants are interfering with your personal values (you want the baby and he doesn't), then maybe he's not good for you-maybe yall should seperate. Dont let him hit you!
2007-01-04 03:42:24 · answer #3 · answered by superbad~honeydip 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the police, ask for info on the nearest shelter. Pack up, go to the shelter. Don't go near the murderous husband again.
Good for you! You are a great person for saving the life of your child. Some day you will find a wonderful man to marry who will love both you and your precious child. Until then take care of yourself and the baby, get educated and find a good job.
Do NOT use Staple's EASY BUTTON, it will only bring you a new filing cabinet.
2007-01-04 03:39:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him? He sounds abusive and controlling. He should not be hitting you. He can't just tell you to have an abortion because he wants a son not a daughter.
Be honest with yourself. Do you love him? Do you want to be with him? Deep down, are you happy in this relationship? You have to do what's right for you and people will understand.
Tell him how you feel. If you can't, then you have to ask some serious questions whether this relationship is right for you.
There are people around who will support you. Go to your local citizens advice. Get in touch with friends and family from abroad. They will want to help. You are not alone because there are people who will be more than willing to help you.
Feel free to reply to this if you want x x
2007-01-04 03:49:38 · answer #5 · answered by Pat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my lord, HE HITS YOU???? Just tell him the clinic wouldn't let oyu get an abortion and you didn't want to tell him because you were afraid he would hurt you. IF HE TOUCHES YOU WHILE PREGNANT GET OUT OF THERE. Go anywhere, womens shelter anything, do not put up with abuse. Think of your unborn child...if hes willing to hit you, he will be abusive to your children as well. Do the right thing hun.
2007-01-04 03:39:41 · answer #6 · answered by . . * h o n e y * . . 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mira I am sorry to hear about your problem. No one should be hitting anyone. Its wrong for a man to hit his wife.
Well you just have to talk to him and let him know the truth. Truth sometimes hurts but its always the best to say the truth. If he has a problem, then he needs to get help. God gives us what he desires. We can not and are not suppose to determine what we are going to have.
This seems like a case of spousal abuse.
2007-01-04 03:43:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find another man! Hitting is not OK here in the US. You have the right and control over your body and the child you are carrying. Get out of that crazy abusive marriage you are in and find someone else who will love you AND your baby daughter!
2007-01-04 03:37:50 · answer #8 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you come from a different culture but, you can't stay with him and get beaten for having a baby girl. Call your local battered women's shelter and talk to someone there. You can't hide your pregnancy and you can't take even one more beating. You need to get away from him to protect yourself and your unborn baby. I know that your culture thinks it's ok for men to beat their wives but, you're not in Iraq anymore. There is absolutely no way you can tell him that will keep him from being mad at you. Run for your life and that of your baby.
2007-01-04 03:42:10 · answer #9 · answered by mjm52 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, if you are in the United States, call the police the next time he hits you. Lady, please do not forget that no one should hit you for any reason, not even your husband.
And if you still love him after all your miseries, tell him about the baby. I see no harm in that.
2007-01-04 03:41:54 · answer #10 · answered by Shiv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋