i asked her if she wanted to nip off for a week to dubai, or go skiing, i always buy her the best of anything, i thought i was doing nice things. is this normal
2007-01-04 02:59:30 · 35 answers · asked by lee f 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
we have been together 3 years but she only said it today, she usually loves the new handbags, nice food etc
2007-01-04 03:42:23 · update #1
She obviously isn't used to being treated so well, I would suggest taming it down a little and saving things like that for special occasions. there is nothing wrong with wiping her off for the weekend for her birthday or valentines day but for no reason is a bit much for some. you only need to spoil her for those occasions. if you want to buy her flowers once a month limit , I'd suggest. And how about changing the holiday invite to a dinner invite that's a bit easy to take... being as nice as you are will drive her away to much of a good thing is bad for you remember.. Just choose your moments to be sweet she doesn't need grand gestures all the time to believe you care for her :)
2007-01-04 03:12:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wolfman46 is right. Not so much treating her "too good" but more coming across as desperate and there has probably been a very subtle shift in the balance of your relationship.
I think if you announce that you need some time to yourself for a bit, then this will give her a bit of space as well.
Hey, it happens, people get used to being really close then the mind just needs to have some space and that is ok.
Try not to worry too much about it.
Remember that it is vulgar to be mean but it is also a poor show to shower someone with gifts when it makes them uncomfortable.
To all the guys, there is no "formula" for dating or relationships, just be yourself and stay in tune with what makes you comfortable. Women do not generally want loads of gifts or expensive "things". A guy simply "getting" them and being there for them is worth a hell of a lot more than holidays or expensive items. Those women who are sheep and talk about how they want a man with loads of money......er, there's a name for them. They are called whores.
Think about it.
2007-01-04 05:01:52 · answer #2 · answered by KD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she's a down-to-earth kind of girl and wants to live normally for a change. I know not every woman wants to be swept off her feet all the time. Just like a boring life, the exciting life can get old... So listen to her. Take a break from the excitement and spend quality time with her at home.
2007-01-04 03:02:11 · answer #3 · answered by Jessi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She means that you don't have to buy her expencive gifts to make her love you even more. Sometimes the smallest thing makes a big difference. Buy her a rose (whatever her favo flower is) when she is feeling sad, remember it's a thought that counts. As long as u remember and think about her interests and things she likes. Maybe she just wants you to be the person that impresses her without having to buy expenssive stuff, your personality or jokes may help.
2007-01-04 08:43:46 · answer #4 · answered by simple is great and easy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she means, she just wants to spend time with you. She doesnt need you to shower her with expensive things all the time, she's not in the relationship for that (and thats a good thing). A gift every now and then isnt bad, but she might feel as if you're suffocating her, with always doing these things. She sounds like an independant woman, and probably likes to do things for herself. Just spend time with her. she'd probably LOVE it if you guys rented a funny movie, ordered some take out, and just sat around and spent time with eachother. no pressure no anything.
2007-01-04 03:02:32 · answer #5 · answered by wellwtfok 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well this actually happened to me when i first started going out with my boyfriend he would take me to the most expensive restaurant, the best clubs closing the vip and buying bottles of $ 400 champaing and he didnt even drink it. so after our 3 date i told him that he didnt need to spent all that money to impress me. is not that i didnt like it. trust me all woman like nice things but unfortunately a lot a girls are goldiggers and we just dont want our man to think we are like that 2. besides when we like a guy he doesnt need to impress us. and then sometimes if u do it 2 much is just annoying i mean r u that insecure that u need to impress us all time for us to like u. just be nice to her but dont over do it remember all woman crave bad boys im not saying to be a jerk just be more cool dont try so hard.
2007-01-04 03:22:50 · answer #6 · answered by Blondie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm the same way. Even if she was used to that before, shes just not materialistic. Give her the world anyway, she's your queen. Other than that, you can tone it down a bit and leave the expensive side and just rub her back and feet or give her a candle-lit dinner. You dont have to go extreme all the time but I love how you can express your love like that
2007-01-04 03:22:05 · answer #7 · answered by Déjà Vu 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree with her you are spending too much time trying to almost buy her affection with too many gifts instead of concentrating on her. Relax - get to know her properly by taking her away for a weekend to a secluded beach for romantic walks or a simple picnic and TALK to her....she doesn't obviously want all this gifting and fussing and being impressed...she wants to know YOU not you bank balance!!!
2007-01-04 03:02:55 · answer #8 · answered by Confuzzled 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
shes gotten comfortable with you. This is one reason why marriages are usually rocky for the first 7 years. people go from learning about a person and finding out what pleases them to knowing that if they did some thing it will please them to forgetting what pleases them and have to relearn what pleases them. yes if you haven't figured out my answer it is normal should you worry maybe but if you are wanting her to please you more help her by telling her open communication only helps a relationship either to get stronger or fall apart quicker so you can move on to better things
2007-01-04 03:06:25 · answer #9 · answered by prettygirl_80650 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She means stopping doing things that are out of your character and jus be yourself if you keep putting too much effort into the relationship it will go wrong! I know that sounds abit too mad because if you dont put enough effort into the relationship it can also go wrong so jus try and stay in between.
2007-01-04 03:02:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋