How do I convince my mom's friend to quit buying things and to get rid of the things she has?

Question

I just recently started helping my mom's friend of many years clean her home. She has a very nice home but you can't tell it. She is a shop-aholic in the worst sense. She is a millionaire who lives in a middle class neighborhood. She doesn't live like she has money at all EXCEPT for her shopping habits. She is unable to get around well because of horrible back trouble which has also led to obesity. So... she basically does nothing around her home except collect packages that she buys off the internet or QVC home shopping network. She has a bedroom FULL of unopened boxes & there are boxes lining the walls in all the other rooms in her home. I feel overwhelmed because she doesn't want to let go of anything. I feel I've bit off something bigger than I can chew but I really want to help her. I'm not helping her by letting her keep all the things she is buying. Any kind advice is appreciated. Thanks! I should add that I don't want her things. I just want her to live healthy.

I put this under psychology because I think she has a mental illness. Please help! Thanks and God bless!

Answer 1

She is a shopaholic and it is a disease under compulsion disorders when taken to extremes. You have to handle her with kid gloves or very patiently over time. They get agitated easily...you need someone in there that can handle the situation like a daughter or a son...A lot of older people are going that route because when they were young they were denied stuff and this is their security net or cover. I have a sister in law that if she goes into a store she has to buy something because the owner has to pay bills. We went into twenty odd number of stores and she bought stuff out of twenty odd number of stores! I was taught to window shop...comparison price...be glad for what you got. Try and find out if she would like to see someone else enjoy a couple of the articles or a yard sale for what she does not need..ebay...local classified listing...How about asking her to support a library by buying books and having them listed in her name instead of HSN...

Answer 2

Perhaps the way to get through to this woman is to explain that having all this stuff piled up in boxes doing nothing is really unfair considering there are people out there who have nothing. Explain that the value of things lessens over time and if she isn't using the stuff, it is just sitting there becoming worthless when it could be helping someone who has lost everything in a fire etc.

The woman is obviously bored. If she can't do much due to her condition then the only thing she probably has to keep her occupied is buying stuff. Try to convince her that she needs a new hobby or pastime to occupy her. Suggest a home study course, or writing a book, or scrapbooking or whatever, something she can do at home that won't be impacted by her health.

If the internet is something that interests her, why not suggest she research worthy charities to donate stuff to, or sell it all on ebay and use the money to pay for a home study course or whatever.

It sounds like boredom to me but it really is a crime for her to have all these things that she doesn't need or use when there are people out there that have nothing.

Answer 3

Use your allowance for issues you like! in case you do no longer receive any, ask your mom to furnish you slightly allowance each and each week (or month). That way, you could save up your money and purchase what you like with out your mom objecting. that's what I do.. Haha.. I used to ask her for money each and all of the time and that i could spend too lots on issues i do no longer likely desire. Then while there is something i in my opinion desire, she could say no. So then, she started giving me allowance each and each month for issues i desire. I spend it on snacks and clothing. She buys needs for me however, including textbooks for college. My mom informed me that she has been saving loads of money from this technique. or you may additionally tell her which you wanna fit in with the foreign places usa's style... It advise.. shifting to a sparkling usa is a no longer common element to do... If i moved, my mom ought to a minimum of purchase me a distinctly gown, no? it somewhat is unlike its going to waste....

Answer 4

and y do you care???