Deppression?

Question

Am always feeling low
My family are 200 miles away and only get to see them 2x year as cost to go there is very high. and also i really dont see my parents because i left home as things were bad between me and them.
So i have no family and no freinds. I live with my husband, but i still feel so lonely. we dont go out much as we have tight budget ever since we brought our own house.
Its been nearly 4 years and i havent still made any freinds. i rarely go out with work collegues for a drink. But find it hard to meddle in as all they talk about is alcohol and pubs. I never drank in my life as am muslim so therefore i dont know anything about drinks and pubs.
i always have tight feeling in my chest, difficult breathing. am only 21yrs old. i told my husband every time i felt low/upset sad. but he doesnt like it, and then he goes angry. i wanted to kill myself so many times, but dont any guts to do it. i told my husband this, and he was upset. wish i had freinds and family.

Answer 1

You need to seek professional help, really...
esp when suicide thoughts are present. please don't get any more opinions....

Answer 2

You could be suffering from depression and an anxiety disorder. Go to your doc and tell him how you have been feeling. You might need to be put on some meds. I am bipolar and use to feel the same way you do all the time. Now that I'm on meds, i don't get depressed very often and I don't have thoughts of harming or killing myself. I also have anxiety disorder. The tight feeling in your chest and difficult breathing are signs of anxiety disorder. You need to see someone who can help and your husband will be happier too because he will see that you are trying to make life better for yourself and for him. Don't give up though, things will get better, but please, go see your doc because there really is help out there. Also, try joining a group or offer to volunteer somewhere where you will be around other people and have the opportunity to help yourself and others at the same time. You may make some new friends along the way.

Answer 3

where's God in your life?you sound spiritually disconnected.you don't have to do the things that others do and you can feel proud of your choices not to drink and socialize in negative ways.Now you can either join some of your fellow workers some times with out drinking and perhaps show them that a good time can be had with out the drinks.perhaps you are at that job or in that place to help some one else who may be struggling with these issues and doesn't have the strength to pull back and your influence could be just what they need.Don't think life is always about you, and your happiness because being of service to others is the best way to feel good about life and you are where you are because God wants you there for His purpose.Try just joining the world a little and seek what is out there for your contribution.I know one thing that you could do is help people understand that all Muslims are not terrorist and that Muslim women have a voice in this world and if you can help one person's fears about Islam be lessened,you will have done a great service.Good Luck and have a blessed year.Jesus was among them ,but not as them.

Answer 4

I understand your situation. I have just moved to where my partner works as we have two children. This has taken me out of my comfortable zone and sometimes I do feel like the life I love is also my prison. I have a beautiful home, wonderful children and a loving partner, though we live in the middle of nowhere and I don't drive (my fault). Talking is always a good start (chat rooms are great as they are completely anonymous so you can say as much as you want). It could be that your husband thinks you are blaming him, you need to be careful how you phrase your concerns. Be sure to tell him first that you don't hold him responsible for your feelings, that you love him, but that you really need him to listen to you. It's important that you and he talk. There is somewhere for you to find friends, I believe there is also a charitable website that provides help and support specifically for muslim women in the uk. In the meantime, this may sound lame, but go for walks, this really does help, you can pound out your frustration, think more clearly and quietly and it gives you a natural high. Good luck and be strong.

Answer 5

your husbant is your family
you can call your parents and make up your relationship with them
you will feel a lot better and i am sure that they will be happy too
in a few years your financial state will be much better and then you
will be able to go out a lot more often but untill then make the most out of the time you are at home: get a nice hobby ( there are a lot a sites in the internet with ideas), read some nice books, spent some quality time with your husbant
go to places where you can meet new people
be more friendly with the people you know,invite them at home to get to know them better and let them know you better also

And all these untill you have a child ,after that you will be very happy with your child and there will be no room for depression

Answer 6

Obviously you can't expect any help from your husband with this problem, & since your family is estranged from you then you must seek some support by another means. Since you are muslim, see if there is a mosque somewhere near you, & look for support there. Also see your family doctor & tell him/her about your difficulties with the depression. Alot of what you are experiencing in your life could change rather quickly if you were able to change your outlook on life, & the way you look at things could be influenced by chemical imbalances in your body, & that's where a doctor could help you. Another way a doctor could possibly help you might be to refer you to councelling if you could benefit from that too.
There are also a great variety of self-help books out there that you might benefit from as well, so try searching the shelves of a nearby bookstore for one of those.
Hope you feel better soon.

Answer 7

You are not the only one and you have to realize this. Millions of us deal with this day in and day out. We have our good days and our bad days. But you are not alone.

Try to do some reading, or try staying on this site and look for similar problems with others: Try answering their questions by helping them with your own experiences. This will help you become more aware of what is going on with you.

Sometimes we are just missing something that we need in our lives, and if we push for answers we stumble on to something that helps.

Try not to get so deep into the depression. It's a trick. You can be happy by starting to fake you are when you feel down. Fake your smiles and mood. Eventually with each smile your balance internally (mind/emotional) will start to swing you back to happy land.

As I always say "It's so difficult being human, why couldn't I have been a dolphin". Free and happy.

Answer 8

Rosy-try joining a club-or taking up a hobby, with or without your husband, there are many hobbies out there, loads in fact. You could pick out an educational hobby too...you don't need to go out when you do some hobby's, like jigsaw's, model making or cross stitching. You could be a "pen pal" to many people across the globe from the "net"-also you could take up letter writing.....good old fashioned pen to paper style, and a good place to start would be with writing to your parents and "patching" things up with them. Go and see your family doctor about the way you feel, you should not suffer depression in silence rosy-there ARE people out there who you can talk with-however try not to go down the "pill" route...you will be ages coming off them-if ever. Hope i helped.

Answer 9

I think your husband is upset because he doesn't know how to help you. Go to a doctor that you trust and tell him how you are feeling. I was in a similar situation and I made good friends when I started going to church. Doctors and counsellors helped me a great deal, but the best help was when I talked to God. Find out if there is a Muslim gathering that you can go to. Don't kill yourself, you can have a life full of happiness and joy. Best wishes.

Answer 10

Friends and family are a great part of and in life, but no one should rely on anyone else to supply your happiness. It sounds that you are experiencing some anxiety symptoms, in which case you might want to consult a doctor. Try going out with your co-workers, you don't have to drink alcohol along with them. But it will get you out. I suspect that being Muslim, you might be isolating yourself in fear that someone might reject you. Or it's making you withdrawn while in the presence of people which is sending them the message that you aren't seeking closeness. Is your husband of the Muslim faith? Have you thought about relocating to a place near your family? That might be something to consider....good luck and hang in there!

Answer 11

I have worked in the mental health field for 7 years. You do sound depressed with a touch of anxiety (tightness in chest, difficulty breathing, etc)

Have you honestly tried to make friends or are you feeling sorry for yourself? Get involved somewhere. Maybe even volunteer somewhere. That will make you feel better and hopefully make more quality friends. Change starts with you.