mother-n-law problems?

Question

My husband is a big mama's boy and for christmas and new year's vacation he drove me crazy. We live with his mother and during his time here (HE IS IN THE ARMY) he spent the day with me and our baby and at night with his mom. He puts his mom before me and our baby. I dont know what to do. His mom calls me selfish and my husband does to. Now that he left back to the military base me and his mom dont get along. any suggestions. He is talking about divorice cause he will not leave his mother. She is ruining our marrgiage. I love him alot. But he needs to separate himself from her.

Answer 1

Sweetheart, a man who chooses to keep his mother in the place that properly belongs to his wife, is no man at all. Further, a mother who insists on taking that place, is no woman you want in your life. She will keep you in a constant hell - for the remaining time you stay married.

He WILL NOT GROW UP, he will not change. He is a baby. This attachment to his mother is abnormal and encouraged by her. The army couldn't make a man out of him and unfortunately you won't either.

Good luck with that divorce! CONGRATULATIONS!

Best kill it quickly rather than letting them do it slowly.

Answer 2

Tell him how you feel if that doesn't change then you have 2 choices deal with this situation or get out of it the tone is being set, you should have never moved in that house. He needs to be a Man, a husband and Father first and then a Son in tha order.

Answer 3

Hello,
He's not trying to seperate you its his mother thats trying to seperate you both soo much. If you're angry at him just talk to him and finish both of you are married and there is something that the mother is trying to do to you both. Sometimes mothers can seperate married people for some dum ways and if they call you 'Selfish' just ignore it you're not selfish. Let you're husband quit the millatery and have a nice job and try to let him understand that he doesn't need to be a Mama's Boy and he needs to be a Man!.

Sincerly,
Dr. Nawaf Rumaihi

Answer 4

unfortunately he has to want you more than her and the fact she is keeping him away from his own child while she has hers is quite sad,,he may not realize his mistake until it is too late or until she pops off and he wonders what he has left and what he has lost,some women you can speak to and some just wont listen and if there is any chance you can talk to her woman to woman do so,,you have everything to gain and by the sound of it little to lose.sneaky i know but could you ask her advice on how to save your marriage,let her know how worried you are for the baby and yourself,,point out he will miss everything if this divorce goes through,,she either talks to you and tries to help or she openly makes it clear where you stand,at least in her eyes and you can gage where you need to make changes,,the chances are she is frightened to death you are going to take him away and is it that he is all she has,,better to make an ally than an enemy and if she get a glimmer of hope you want to be part of this family she may back off a little but if nothing works,,,,before you do anything tell her and him what you think,,you will regret it if you dont and one day,,he will regret it too.you may love him but if he is hearing one thing from you and another from her and he still chooses her with all he can see happening it is likely nothing will change,,he has to want change for anything to happen.

Answer 5

I have problem with mother in law too, And Lucky my hubby does protect me from her. I don't speak with her since last christmas.
( yes, I'll never call or I'll never visit her unless she come to apologize )
You have a frist baby, so his mother has power to guide you how take care of baby.
I have 3 childrens now and I don't need mother in law's help anymore. She need relax at home.

The answer is... You should get 2nd baby. LOL

Answer 6

Ah, the mother-in-law conflict.
Your husband is the main culprit. He shouldn't take sides the way he does, he should instead explain to his mother that you are his wife now and that you need your space, as most probably did his mother when she got married to his father.
All you can do now, is keep a law profile and please don't antagonize your mother-in-law even if she is wrong; be patient, time will eventually cure the problem.

Answer 7

Did you not see the signs before you got married?
Once again I say, there is a reason for premarital counseling. If you two attend church, or even the mother, then you all would know that the spouse comes first...

Answer 8

sounds like you have a momma's boy on youre hands. And sometimes the wont leave there mommy's not even for there family. You may eithr have to put up with it or put youre foot down and move out and show him youre very serious about htis whole matter..

Answer 9

Did you already suggest to your husband to separate from her mom?To start with your own?You do have a baby already it's uncomfortable to stay at his mom house because it's to obvious that your not in good terms..Maybe if you open up to him you can resolve the problem..............keywords.......be nice to him when opening this topic......

Answer 10

no,you need to become a part of his family.you should never ,ever come between a mother because you will lose.That mans mother will always be a part of his life,especially after you and he have split,so why you would allow your self to feel jealous of his attention to his mom ?makes me think you have mother issues of your own.You should respect his love for his mother and try to be a daughter to her.It's obvious you need to know what it feels like to have motherly love, so settle in and see why he loves her so much and make sure you try to love her too and maybe she will teach you how to raise kids who will love you.