How does not having a father affect a male's life?

Question

And having an abusive stepfather for 5 years?
Please give details on love life, insecurities, and anger issues

Thank you

He is very distant and isolated from his mother, and the stepfather was abusive to both the mother and to him.

He grew up without a permenant home, he and his mother were constantly moving... they've lived in 50 different states in the US.

He's had a life that he doesn't deserve, but he constantly presents himself as optimistic and funny. Though I know there's more to him than that... he attempted suicide 3 times.

Oh and I should make something clear... THIS ISN'T ME that grew up without a father.

I'm just wondering about someone.

I'm also female and a bit of a daddy's girl... so none of this should apply to me.

Thanks again ;)

Answer 1

I'm an elementary school teacher and I've noticed that generally, children with fathers who are involved in their child's life do better socially and academically than children who don't have a strong male figure. I think fathers are underrated in our society.
I've known many single moms who've done great and raised wonderful children. Usually these kids have a positive male role model in their life, such as a grandfather, uncle or close family friend.
Child abuse is the most repulsive crime in our society. The impact can be lifelong and unfortunately it can be passed on from generation to generation.
If this person's only male role model was in his life for five years, he probably had a huge impact. Anger issues would not be uncommon. I'd be pissed too if some a**hole was abusive to me. He may have issues with his mom since she did not protect him. He probably is going to be dealing with a lot of trust issues which could translate into major insecurities.
This poor guy needs counseling. Try to be patient with him. As horrible as 5 years if, at least it wasn't his entire life. Very very sad.

Answer 2

I don't know if you have a biological father or not, but if you do, please talk to to him about the abusive stepfather. Talk to someone about it. Your mom should put a stop to his behavior. I would never let a man abuse my child. You are a good person and even though there is anger in your home, please try to think positive and be as different as you can from your stepfather. I know that it is hard for you but remember you can be anything you want to be and do anything you want to do but you have to remain strong. You can't let this man ruin your life. Get into church and find you a fatherly figure there. I will be praying for you and please take care of yourself. God loves you and so do I.

Answer 3

Oh, please there are tons of males that grew up without fathers and only a handful of gays in this world....there is no correllation there.

heres what my experience and amatuer studies have shown:
Love life-
you will not be entirely actuated in manly ways becuse of your abusive father, most likely because of your close interaction wih moms, many of your ways of thinking will be more closely intuned with females. This works against you in your love life. This doesn't mean you are any where near "gay", it means you are a "nice guy"(some people say "wussy"). Relationships with women will be that of controlling females or females that will take advantage of your "niceness" and generally want to be "in charge".

insecurities-
sometimes will stem from the abusive treatment from pops. Not to mention from the main source of would be Manliness and further compounded by the previous( your love life).

anger issues-
Are you seeing how all this stuff just stacks on top and feeds the next , anger issues show up because you are insecure because of the abuse, you get mad at your self or others because of your love life, you feel insecure so you lash out on others, viola "anger issues".

The Best part though is once you recognize if any of this **** is going on you can choose to either stop it or nurture it. You are in complete control of yourself, you cant change what small people did to you. Recognize what is causing what and close the loop to become a better person.

All you gotta do is remove all this stuff in reverse order, remove the anger issues, then deal with your insecurities, your love realatins will improve becase you have become a "man".

(speaking generically or generally as in average cause and effect relationships from the things you mentioned[this isn't true for everybody or all the time, but in most cases])

Answer 4

Life without a father is like walking on a terrace where there is no railings. And having an abusive stepfather is like the terrace with damaged and weak railing.

No railing is better than weak one.
So you need to be very careful while you are walking on the edges of the terrace.

Answer 5

My father died when I was five and I was raised by my mom.
I turned out fine even though I really had a lot to learn. Hopefully you'll learn to 'reconstitute' yourself for the parts you may have missed or been misinformed about. Be wise; the answers are within you. And remember, Everybody has their story to tell. Great people have overcome great obstacles.

Good luck.

.

Answer 6

not having a father or having a bad father are one in the same.
without a caring male you will not imprint as somebody who does.
mothers can only do so much & in many cases do an excellent job.
it is the little things that will be missed.
how to pee if you are male.
male skills.
camping,fishing,swearing,sports,man talk.
if you are male it is also the handing over of the rite to protect the family as guardian.

Answer 7

It still depends on how the child was brought up and their relationship with the mother.

Some children (it's debateable, but my opinion is) end up gay. I'm not saying anything's wrong with being gay, I'm just telling the outcome of the situation.

Other times, the child grows to have relationship issues, such as violence, causing them to think it's alright to beat on their wives, ect.

Most times, they just become more sensitive than norm to fatherly figures.

<3
stranger.

Answer 8

With experience, it hurts. Bad.