I have a 10 yr old daughter who started her period at age 9, What do i do? She seem so little for that stuff?

Question

She started her period at age 9. I was not ready as a parent for "THE TALK". It is so hard to explain certain things to a kid like that when she still believes in santa. I was preparing myself for this when she was going to be a little older. Now everything has changed and I have no idea how to do this stuff. Please help me with this. Does she need to start getting check ups...etc? Man what do I do?! Some people have told me to start her on birth control but that is so stupied I am not going to do that. Man am I ever lost!!! HELP!!!

Answer 1

I started my period when I was 8, I am now 19. I remember starting was a very difficult time because being a girl and starting at that age you really have no one else to talk to about it. A lot of other girls don't get them for another 3 or 4 years. So what my mom did she brought be comfort food and just sat with me. She let me that she knew what I was going through. About "the talk"...my mother really never explained that to me. But I already knew. Now that i remember, she told me what could come with a period if I involve myself with sexual activity, meaning pregnancy.

Also, I wish my parents would have done this for me. Give you r daughter some kind of promise ring...meaning not to have sex till she is married. Having lost my virginity recently I know that would have stopped me big time. It also depends on how you raise your daugther..meaning lots of morals which my parents did for me. I was always a goody good and i would not take that back for anything.

One more thing, make sure her father is very involved in her life. having a father there to talk to her like a best friend keeps girls from doing things that you should not be doing. Because in the back of her mind will be..what would my mom or dad say if i did this?

I really hope this helps!
just be there for her!
God Bless.

Answer 2

She does not need any checkups other than her normal yearly physical that she should have been getting ever since she was a baby. You do need to talk to her about sex and birth control etc though even though she is only 10. She may never be sexually active before she marries but she needs to know all of the facts so that she has a clue before hand. If you need help look for websites dealing with this or get some books from the library. Let her know that she can come to you with any questions or problems she may have. There is no need to start her on birth control unless she would become sexually active or if she has a real problem with her periods being heavy with excess cramps etc. Just as an FYI but if she does become sexually active then she will need a yearly pap and pelvic exam otherwise that can wait until she turns 18.

Answer 3

She will be fine and so will you Momma. I was 8. My mother sat and cried and cried. God knows why. I learned about the birds and bees from my great grandmother whose home I was at when it first occurred. Just tell her enough truth and add to it as she gets older. You would be so surprised at her response. Make sure you explain the cleanliness part and that she has enough supplies etc for whenever. There is a big chance she will have the one and then none for a year or so. I had 2 that were 9 and the last one was 13. We are all different in that aspect. Don't let her see how upset you are or she may think it is something bad.

Hey I still believe in Santa!

Feel free to email me if you need to. I am into a grandkid now past that stage. God Bless.

Answer 4

My advice is to be as frank and open and honest as you can be with her. dont use big words she doesnt understand, and dont be vague about the facts. Something parents forget about today (mine included when i was that age) is how curious kids are once they start going through puberty. They want to know what is going on with their body, and why, and what happens next. It is important that you share as many of the facts with her right now as you can. Because if not she could end up believing the well intentended "lies" of other young girls her age. Or worse: reading it on a bathroom wall. Or worse yet: falling into a trap later on set by a cunning boy.

Keep the lines of communication open. Kids listen to their parents and look up to them a lot more than parents think they do. I wasnt a kid so long ago that i dont remember what it was like (am currently 22).

No to the birth control. That comes later on..she's way too young for that just yet. And if you keep the honest, open lines of communication flowing she is more likely to tell you before she makes the choice to have sex, and then you and her can go get her some birth control together.

She doesnt need pap smears of any of those types of check ups yet. those dont usually start until age 18, or once you become sexually active...whichever comes first.

good luck!! and dont be scared or nervous..just remember she's your little girl, and she's looking up to you :)

Answer 5

Birth control at that age would really only be useful if her period is really irregular.

No, you don't need to get her to a gyno. Do you remember your first visit? Now immagine what it would have been like if you had been ten. There's no need unless there's a problem, at least not until she becomes "active" or turns 18.

I don't really know a whole lot to tell you. What my mom did was buy me a bunch of crappy books that talked about feelings more than what was going on, which didn't help at all. There was one that was great that I borrowed from a friend, "The Period Book." I don't know if they still make it though.

Just sort of explain to her that it's hormones and that in between periods she can do whatever, and on her period the only thing she can't do is swim unless you allow her tampons *my mom didn't at first, but that's because she doesn't use them. she tried once and didn't put it in far enough and never again*

It'll be okay, it happens.

Answer 6

I recommend that you talk to your daughter and explain to her that her body has given her a new responsibility. Explain to her "age approprietly" what the period is and what it stands for. Explain to her that no one should touch her in her private area and so on. NEVER start her on birth control at that age. First she is too youg and if she is not sexually active then that is a door that you should not open. Other parts are going to start growing larger then normal. Just because her body has started maturing doesent mean that it's matured yet. She is still a child that believes in Santa Clause and you can handle it. Now last thing that I suggest is that maybe you need to have more alone time with her. Just mommy and daughter time, like go to the movies together, lunch, get nails done,etc. This is a difficult time for her too and you need each other to get through it.

Answer 7

just b/c she has a period, it doesn't neccessarily mean she needs the talk...right now she has no idea the two are even related. Birth control is ridiculous, shes only 9. Even though it seems early, ages 9-16 are considered normal by doctors. and about the talk, eventaully in 5th grade or so, she will start to get the hint and you can tell her with ease. A check-up wouldn't hurt, just to see if she is doing alright

Answer 8

The fact is that girls are reaching menarche sooner and sooner. This has a lot to do with improved nutrition and health care. So, 9 might be a bit young, but not that young.

You were preparing yourself to talk with her when she was older, but right now, you still have to talk with her. Just give her information on the menstrual cycle and how to take care of herself. If she has questions, answer them truthfully.

Take a couple of deep breaths here, and if you still have questions, talk with your doctor about this. I highly doubt that a doctor will suggest any sort of birth control for her. But it is up to you to have all of these talks with her, as it's appropriate to do so. Then again, it always has been appropriate to do so, as she has asked questions. That might have helped already, however, you can't rewrite your history.

I do mean that stuff about taking a couple of deep breaths. From what you've said, I'd be more concerned just now about you than about your daughter. It's OK and she's OK.

Answer 9

The best advice is to sit her down and talk to her about sex and giver her "THE TALK" as you planned when she was older. Children are far more sexually advanced then we were now a days. Heck all you have to do is watch TV and see the sexual references in alot of shows and believe me they were not put there for adults.
I would have her checked every year, but would not start her on birth control pills as of yet.
I would explain as much as you can, she may forget some of it but keep reinforcing your talks as she grows older. Answer her question to the best of your knowledge and seek help if you do not know the answers.
Try and guide her through these troubling time as best as you can. Like I said you will be surprized at what she might already know.

Answer 10

Man I was 9 when I got mine and I never was told.She should be okay s o long as she has your support.No need for birth control.If she has heavy periods or any form of clotting then take her to a doctor preferably a female one. Girls get embarassed..Ensure the teacher knows because most schools have facilities such as spare pads for emergencies. Unfortunately the age of puberty has decreased. No parent is reallyprepared for their daughters to grow up this fast.Best of luck.