married to somebody and love somebody else what to do?

Question

hello....i am married but still think about my GF in college. Is it normal? I think i would have been happier with my GF.

Answer 1

You will always have a special place for your college girl, but the reason that you think you are still in love with her is because
she represents a simpler time in your life.... a carefree time before marriage, bills, family.......responsibility.
I am guessing that you love your wife or, I should think, you never would have married her. Work on what you have now
instead of pondering "what could have been" because that will only lead to unnecessary heartache. However, if you are TRULY unhappy with your wife and there is NO fixing it then divorce her and move forward.

Answer 2

That's kinda sticky. On one hand there's the immediate gratification, the high of the wedding, the honeymoon you know and, the hope and chance that you can learn to love that person (which does happen). Then, there's the worries of what happens after that. What happens if the external circumstance change? do you then say, start an affair or call for a divorce. who knows what's next. Then, what may happen if the one you married suspects somethings up? Then again, maybe the marriage is a way out of some terrible life threatening situation. In that case, well, "we've all got to live" so that we can have choices... Truly, a hard one. After all is said and done you got to make the best decision for you. As for myself marriage is hard enough when you love someone. I couldn't see myself succeeding without Love. But I've been called a romantic too. I hope I've helped.

Answer 3

You only have one life to live. No sense wondering what could have and should have been. Find the college girl and see if she is still the same girl you use to know. She might have changed her ways in a way where you could never deal with her. If it were meant for you to be with her, you'll just have to get a divorce and move on. Some people we know from college turn to the worst person ever and were glad we married the one we did. No sense in being miserable in life even though it will hurt your wifes feelings. She might be miserable too and don't know how to tell you.

Answer 4

Well, do you know this for sure? You got married and if you are not happy with your marriage than get a divorce and let both of you move on. Your girlfriend in college may be with someone else right now. you might be missing the carefree time you had, your lack of serious responsibilities and commitment. but it's still a fantasy. Maybe you shouldn't have gotten married at all?

Answer 5

Well, you feel how you feel. After mostly tongue lashings, you need to sit down with your wife and talk about some counseling if you haven't done that already. Do you have kids? Is your high school gf married with kids? Why didn't you marry her? Your question is kind of vague. Is your wife happy? You can talk with a counselor about all of this and more. Good luck.

Answer 6

Then why did you marry the person your with right now? You obviously need to make a decision. Maybe your GF from college has moved on. Poop or get off the pot man.

Answer 7

THERE IS A REASON SHE IS IN YOUR PAST! YOU SHOULD NEVER GO BACK. THINK OF WHY SHE AND YOU PARTED. AND THINK OF YOUR WIFE YOU MARRIED HER. WHATS SO WRONG THAT IT CAN'T BE FIXED? WHY DID YOU MARRY HER? DID YOU LOVE HER? SOME PEOPLE CHANGE AFTER THEY GET MARRIED BUT MOST OF THE TIME WITH HELP THINGS CAN GET BETTER UNLESS YOU BOTH CHANGED AND AREN'T WILLING TO SEE FAULT IN EACH OTHER. GET PROFESSIONAL HELP. YOU MADE A PROMISE BEFORE GOD, SO IF YOU TOOK IT LIGHTLY AND IT SOUNDS AS IF YOU DID, YOU HAVE TO FACE YOUR CONSEQUENCES. REMEMBER THROUGH SICKNESS AND HEALTH, FOR BETTER OR WORSE TIL DEATH DUE YOU PART. AND WHAT GOD PUT TO GATHER LET NO MAN TAKE APART. SO MANY PEOPLE GET MARRIED AND JUST THINK THEY CAN TREAT THERE SPOUSE ANY WAY THEY PLEASE AND CHEAT ON THEM. WRONG. DON'T ANYONE EVER TAKE THE WORDS OF THE LORD SERIOUS ANYMORE?

Answer 8

Most likely you are thinking about you ex because you are trying to make up for something that is lacking in your life. Take a step back, forget your ex who has most certainly moved on, and try to figure out what it is you are missing. Then talk it over with your wife. If things can't be resolved, at least you'll know you tried...and you'll have given your wife the respect that she deserves.

Answer 9

Do not dwell on the past. It's over, and thinking about it will do no good to you or your wife. The future is all you have now. Think of that, and what you can do to improve your relationship with the woman you picked to marry and spend forever with. It was your choice you know, and you did pick her. So work on the here and now.

Answer 10

Do NOT cheat. If you think there is a serious future with your old GF then call her and talk. Then do not even see her in person until you are divorced. People have NO idea how much pain they cause when they cheat.