I'm 16 and never had a girl friend because I find it hard to talk to girls. What can I do? and am i normal?

Question

I'm self concious, and hate my appearance. I know most girls go for a mix between personality and looks but I am not happy with my looks and I'm far too shy. I hardly speak to any girls and have hardly any female friends. How can I make new female friends (bearing in mind I'm extremely shy and self concious). Also what do girls love about Guys appearance and personality wise?

Another thing I'd like to ask is do you think it's worrying that a 16 year old male has never had a girl friend before 'cus I really do and I think that plays a big negative against my self confidence! Please help me! What can I do??

Thanks

Edit - Just need to add that I really want a girl friend and that its not just peer pressure

Answer 1

hey your only a baby yet. it might seem that your old but youve got bags of time before it happens. when you start work and having to mix with lots of other people your confidence will grow.

some people are naturally shy, and they will be waiting for the likes of you to come along. just tell people your just fussy !

as with the appearance, check out some boy magazine and i dont mean ride ones. they have all the latest fashions and hair styles. but just cos its fashion it doesnt mean it will suit you.

try things on if you feel uncomfortable with the image it isnt for you. for now though forget about the need to kiss a girl and before long it will happen ....... good luck hun

Answer 2

Having been a girl once (now I am a woman), I can assure you that being shy does not mean you are invisible to the girls. Shy guys were often the safest guys for nice girls to have a crush on. An by safe I mean that boys and girls find it difficult to connect,and there is such a huge assumption culturally that connection means so much more than conversation and sharing time, that it is easier to hide in side yourself and long for the outside world than to be a part of it. Try joing school clubs that hold a personal interest to you, or become a teachers aide in subject that you are fond of. This puts you in a 'task oriented' role with others and is the best foundation for finding a common interest. Don't forget to consider your church group, and community centers. Again, look for ways that you can be a volunteer (in any capacity). The point is to be physically visible, associating with activities that actually mean something to you, and never, repeat never, get involved in those things that mislead people about you. Good Luck to you.

Answer 3

Well....everything in this world are created with partners. I cant answer u if u ask me what kind of guy girls are searching for cause it depends... Girls like guy who walks, talks, stands and do other things with confidence. Believe me. N never try pretending to be anyone u're not if u're trying to flirt girl. Why?? cause girls love a truthful guy and of course a guy who believe in himself...whoever he is...If u pretend to be someone elses...u might happen to get a catch, but i promise u..it wont last long.
No one is perfect. U are too. So, what to do to make urself a perfect guy??
Listen to me.. U need to find ur strength and weaknesses. then, learn and do maximise ur strength to overcome ur weakness. This will eventually helps u to build up ur confidence.
N after that...haha...no more worries. u dont have to approach any girls. They'll come to u.
N u know what...if u still shy to talk to girls, just take this simple advice; treat them as a friend. Never beyond that until u're sure that u both are good together. till then, just treat her nicely, with no extra feelings okay....just friend.After u're cirtainly sure she's happy being with u, n u have good time together, n then u can pursue to the next step..maybe give her something on her birthday.....
If this works, email me at [e-mail]

Answer 4

Its normal mate, trust me. This was like reading about me 9 years ago. I was 19 before I had my 1st g/f. I was with her for 4 years and now single again. It got to me before I met her that I was lonely. It played on my mind then. It is again. My advise is dont worry. Just go out, enjoy yourself, and you will find the girls will come and go. Confidence is something that comes naturally. What are you good at, ie sports/music?? Do these things, join a gym. Go to places you are likely to meet people. It may not be "cool" but go to your local library, if you are studying. You can look round for a book for your studies and she might be there as well. You never know!

The biggest thing you will hear is dont worry, dont panic. Be yourself. Have a laugh with your mates. This shows confidence. Women love that.

Go get em tiger!

Answer 5

i am exactly the same as you. i am 16 and i don't have a girlfriend. i am also shy but i do have female friends. However i am over coming my fears. it took me a long time to ask this girl out and some how recently managed to ask her out. she said no :( and said she liked me as a friend. it didn't hurt as badly as i thought as that was what i was scared of most i think. However i now have started to get on with more girls and feel more confident because of this. so my advice to you is to find a girl you like, get talking and ask her out. It gave me a huge boost in confidence.

i don't like my appearance either. i am very self conscious of what i do. i was once scared of showing my teeth in public as they were pretty bad. but i got a brace on them and now they are fine. all i can say is get a makeover. go get a new haircut. look for a style you like in a magazine and have it done like that. you will feel better and girls might like you even more.

Answer 6

sure, that's normal. You are still a child, but don't be scared of anything. A closed mouth doesn't get feed, which means that if you see something that you are interested in go for it. If you are turned down then maybe she was not good enough for you anyway (probably a Hood Rat) and you game will get better each time. Just remember if you are turned down that's nothing ,don't trip keep going, at least by 17 yrs old you will be Ready. OK

Answer 7

No, dont worry you are quite normal.

Do you like music? how about you take some lessons in playing guitar or some other instrument.

girls like musicians a LOT and you don't have to be the most talkative guy to play well, being the silent type can add lots of mystique to a person.

good luck & don't worry.

Answer 8

i can relate to you because i'm fifteen (nearly sixteen) and in a similar situation. the other night i was at a new years eve party and there were people snogging all around me, and i felt so lonely and pathetic, and that it was never going to happen for me. i really want someone who cares about me and who i care about, and i feel so behind in comparison with others (im also shy with guys). but whenever i am really down about it, i just tell myslf that things will change because theres nothing that makes me any less attractive than anyone else, i just havent had my chance yet. i hope things work out for you (and myself too, lol). oh my god,this answer is so long ive practically written you the bloody bible...sorry!

Answer 9

Sure you are normal. I will give you a little advice. Guys tend to mess up when talking to girls because the guy is aware that he is talking to a girl. Like there is some sort of special rules for talking to girls because we may want to have sex with them some day. I'll tell you a secret. Girls are just people that want to be treated like everyone else. So talk to the girls like what they are...just a person...like a guy. Of course speak with manners, but let the pretense fall and be natural. You will talk longer to more girls thus increase your chances of meeting one that you will date.

Good Luck

Answer 10

I think most girls like guys that are clean- not dirty.
I know that might sound kind of obvious, but isn't that true?
Your proble gling for a more- detailed appearance about what girls like but (like another question that I just answered) it depends.
It really depends on the girl.
Don't try to change yourself, it's kind of like a puzzle: you can't try to jam one peice in a space because that puzzle piece is bound to change sooner or later, unless you permenatly change the puzzle peice.

I don't think you sound wierd, because everybody is wired in some sence- like me on the internet. I try to give good advice but that's not important.

you proble will get this answer alot but: BE YOUR SELF!

don't change- unless it's a life threating thing but I think you get the point.

I bet there are tons of teens (16) that have never had a girlfriend (or vis versa)

what a longgggg answer.................