My best friend has been dating this guy for almost a year now and it's like I don't exist anymore. Before she started dating him she claimed to never have time to hang out. She works and goes to school. Ever since she has been seeing this guy her schedule has magiacally cleared up. Whenever I ask her to hang out either she can't or she already has plans to be with her boyfriend. It seems like I have to book her months in advance.
This is driving me nuts. I have known her for 8 years now and I don't want to end it like this. But on the other hand I feel like this is too much work. When we speak on the phone I have to prepare something to tallk about to fill in the awkward silences. We even tried the double date thing on my birthday but she just paired off with her boyfriend and they whispered to each other the whole night... She is usually like this with guys but no relationship has lasted this long. Should I even be blaming the boyfriend?
2007-01-03 05:57:01 · 11 answers · asked by Zee Bee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Well it sounds like you know she's been a guy crazy person and I bet this isn't the first time this has happened. Whats making it worse is the relationship is working so the longer the relationship the longer the 2 of you dont hang out. I think you should tell her how you feel and see where it goes from there. If thats not the route you wanna take than wait it out and she'll come back once she gets into a routine with her bf. She's prolly in love and it may take awhile to hang out with her since she has only 1 person on her mind. Don't blame the bf since he's doing something right for her to still be with him.
2007-01-03 10:09:27 · answer #1 · answered by Hey Ya'll 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she's always been like this then you cant really blame her boyfriend...sadly some girls think that they need a man's love and affection to be happy when they hurt the people that really love them by clinging to some guy who could possibly leave her! Now, you should blame yourself for the pain of being best friend less because you already knew that she was like that, and you still decided that you should hang out with her! still have her back, but get out nd meet other people! eventually she'll come around!
2007-01-03 06:01:43 · answer #2 · answered by ((Tornado JoJo)) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No-one is really to blame here. Sadly this happens a lot, which is a shame because your friends are the best support system there is when you need one. There's not really much you can do except to keep in touch with her in the hope she will spend more time with you. Personally I would concentrate on my other friends, or try and make some new friends.
2007-01-03 06:01:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a tough one...
I think that sometimes our friends take us for granted because they know we'll always be there for them..and when they find someone or something they're interested in they lean more towards that way...I think that she is still your friend because you're the one holding on to it...
if you have the courage to, i think you should let her know that you feel neglected at times because you guys were so much closer before and let her know you miss it...I dont think the boyfriend is to blame because she is her own person and she can clearly choose...
The thing that really hit my heart was when my bestfriend told me she misses me and all the times we used to spend together... that was when i took a step back and realized how much she cared for our relationship..
2007-01-03 06:06:49 · answer #4 · answered by jinjer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me as though they like to be really close. Perhaps it is because of something she thought you said about her? Perhaps it is her boyfriend that does not like you hanging out with her?
Whatever the question is, approach her directly. If she truly is your best friend you should have no problem talking to her about it. If she tries to skimp out of talking and begins to avoid you, she is no longer your best friend.
People change over time, after events and such. People are dynamic, they change and there is usually nothing you can do about it next to locking them inside a closet (Don't do that).
The best thing is to confront her like I said. As they say, you don't want to regret not talking to her about it do you?
2007-01-03 06:04:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion, i've got self assurance if she would not substitute you will possibly desire to drop her as a pal. i be attentive to that is going to likely be confusing because of the fact which you experience such as you like and prefer to be there for her because of the fact which you 2 have been by using a lot... yet, you sound like a sturdy guy... in case you do not confront her approximately her habit you could start up doing what she's doing... optimistically you does not decrease your self to do them ignorant issues... yet whilst she would not substitute and you reside her chum... you purely might finally start up doing the stuff along with her. So my advice may be to talk to her by using textual content cloth or on line (because of the fact it may be a lot extra easy) and clarify how the way she acts now concerns you.. purely make specific to not be rude approximately it and upload in which you omit your previous chum and not the guy she has grow to be. superb of success my dude, sorry approximately your subject ):
2016-12-15 14:47:59 · answer #6 · answered by zabel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell her how you feel. You shouldn't blame her boyfriend, he didn't do anything. Maybe ask her if she could cancel just one date with him and hang out with you for a while. While you are hanging out you could casually slip in that you want to hang out with her more often. Maybe she will hang out with you more.
2007-01-03 06:14:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why dont u just tell her how u feel and tell her that u dont want to lose her as a friend and if it dotn work she aint worth it a true friend would never set her friends aside for her boyfriend she somehow can manage and make a little room for u in her schedule dont u think!!
2007-01-03 06:00:57 · answer #8 · answered by Jussiie Fresita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SORRY that happens. IF you were to find a bf things may change. YOU could double date. THATs fun.
2007-01-03 05:58:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think she just putting her boyfriend in between yall friend ship but if it comes down to yall not to be froends any more it will just have to happend..........but i think you should not call her for a long time just let her call you an i bet uyou that she would be wordering why you havent callled you should try that
2007-01-03 06:04:53 · answer #10 · answered by c.d.c most wanted 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋