My god son's mother called me Saturday to tell me that she was pregnant once again. She has 1 child, had one abortion and one miscarriage. She is pregnant from a guy that she has been sleeping with for about 2 years now. According to her, this guy does not even consider her to be his girlfriend just a female friend. When she found out that she was pregnant she was disapointed about the news and wanted to know if I would adopt her unborn baby. I don't know if she was joking or not but I said no then she asked if I would be this child god mother also.
I basically in so many words called her stupid for continually getting herself into impregnating situations when she is struggling financially with the one child that she already has. Was I insensitive for my comments? I didn't mean to be rude but I just don't understand why she continually puts herself into these dumb situations.
2007-01-03 04:35:15 · 26 answers · asked by Cheryl J 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You comprehend her dilemma. She does not. She is ill prepared for her life and continues to make bad choices.
Even tho you were brutally honest, you probably didn't get through to her, she is doing her best in life. Unfortunately she is bringing in children who will only have a parent in their life. I am sure this guy friend will not share her joy.....
I would go and talk to her and maybe have her visit a free clinic and talk to a professional about some choices that would be more beneficial for the child.
I know it is very frustrating to watch this happen, but she feels so unloved in her life , that she will stop an nothing to have something to love and have someone love her unconditionally, like a child....
She sounds like she doesn't have alot of common sense and also didn't succeed in school.
She needs to find a different direction in life, rather than sleeping around and making babies.
You were harsh, brutally honest but truthful. She called you because you are the god mother and she trusts you and she knows she can count on you..... Maybe she needed you to tell her, just what you thought... maybe she needs to get real.
I wouldn't regret what I had said, you reacted to her and that is totally normal, but she is being very foolish and that is pretty hard to stand by and ignore....
2007-01-03 05:16:30 · answer #1 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing. However, I think that you could have said things a little nicer...without name-calling or that. Some ppl are like her. I know a lady who recently had a baby girl with a married man who still lives with his wife. I think that this is seriously idiotic, but she was happy about it. So what I think is that your friend just wanted to empty herself out to someone.
2007-01-03 05:34:45 · answer #2 · answered by Smiley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you! she should not be open up her legs and than want people to help her take care of her child or adopt her child she should keep her legs close. if she is not going to take care of the baby i don't think you was wrong i think you was right for passing that comments about her you is not the child mother so i don't think you should have to take care of it she is stupid for getting pregnant again after she had a abortion and one was a miscarriage she is just sad keep opening up her legs and getting pregnant and than she want to get a abortion or miscarriage i think you had that stupid hoe right because that is not your child that's her child so let her take care of it she the is making it not you.
2007-01-03 05:13:32 · answer #3 · answered by lil boosie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes, you were insensitive for your comment. But, I think that it was called for. She obviously knows that shes in a bad situation, otherwise she wouldn't have asked u to adopt the baby.
If the only person that cares enough about her to give her some friendly advice is you , then so be it.
2007-01-03 05:03:15 · answer #4 · answered by penelope 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know its stupid and dumb but i will never say it in front of her, they wouldn't know what to do anymore so i don't think you were insensitive for your comments. people can't help saying what comes to their mind. Just say you will always be there whenever she needs someone, and you can't always help with her problems. All you can do is try to make her feel more confident in her situation.
2007-01-03 08:33:53 · answer #5 · answered by Element 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you advise? Like whilst they pass in the docs and %. a image up of the docs daughter off his table and announce that "she seems merely like that one off Coronation St it truly is often falling over under the effect of alcohol". Like which you advise? That replaced into acquaintances 6 year previous son. She pronounced she wanted to get decrease than the table. he's a superb stuffy previous document too. x
2016-10-19 10:06:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No noty rude just brutally honest which is what it sounds like she needs right now. I'd say that you were a good friend. She needs someone who cares enough about her to tell her when she's effing up.
2007-01-03 06:10:11 · answer #7 · answered by flutterby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth hurts. Maybe not the best time to deal with it, but the truth is never an inappropriate comment.
2007-01-03 05:34:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
While I understand you frustration, yes you were rude. You could have talked to her in a better manor, like suggesting birth control. She is looking for support from you, and while you may not agree with her actions, as a friend it's your job to be supportive.
2007-01-03 04:54:36 · answer #9 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Good job. Somtimes the truth hurts. However, you werre a friend because you told her the truth.
2007-01-03 05:30:09 · answer #10 · answered by LOLO W 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋