we have been married for ten years and have a daughter she is seven we have had some problems in the past but she has held them in and wont let go of them and she will not talk to anyone about them or our situation now please help.....
2007-01-03 03:44:08 · 25 answers · asked by jerky592002 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
we got married at 19 and some of the problems is i think she works to much and dosent have time for me and our daughter and i used to call her and gripe at her for it and other things like she would bring her work home on the phone lot of things like that and i would treat her like crap because of it.
2007-01-03 04:48:17 · update #1
she says she still loves me and she dosn't want a divorce yet and still wants to do family things together I am really confused I love her more than anything besides my little one she sort of kicked me out of the house but I dont think that is right because i still have to pay for it and all the bills so it leaves me with nothing so i don't know what to do.....
2007-01-03 09:22:44 · update #2
first off you need to admit what you have done wrong in your marriage and work on what she has problems with. don't mention the word divorce, you go out find counseling or som therepy for yourself work on yourself then you can work on your marriage.
if she says she is not in love with you anymore take it from me it hurts, but it is not end of world. does not mean that she can't love you again. you have to really work on yourself the one that she did fall in love with and go from there. i was in your same shoes last year. do the things that you used to do to help her. clean the house, give her flowers, write poetry. let her know you love her. but don't tell her every five minutes that will put pressure on her.
do not do these things unless your commited to doing them because you want to not to win her back.
you have to make your self important then your kids then her at the moment.
2007-01-03 04:06:36 · answer #1 · answered by boominz28 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you can't make someone love you.
Obviously this is a very personal situation since you left out some pretty crucial details (ex. What kind of problems? Why would she want to leave? etc.) so I'm not really sure what anyone here can possibly do to help you.
The most obvious answer is try to talk things out -- but if your wife isn't willing to do that, then I really don't know what kind of advice we can offer.
It takes two to work things out and it honestly doesn't sound like she's interested in doing that at this point for whatever reason. Sorry I can't be more positive, but I really don't know what more can be said.
2007-01-03 03:50:46 · answer #2 · answered by moonshadow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a challenge as I don't know what she is holding in. Are you sure she is just ready to give up because of these mistakes? How old were you when you got married? The biggest question you should ask of her if you were very young when you got married__ Honey is there something you feel you missed out on because of our youth when we married? If you can't get her to discuss the problem with you so you can fix it I suggest you talk with her parents and ask for help - this will only work if you have a close relationship with them probably but it is worth a try. Other than trying these the only suggestion I can think of is to show her how much you love her. One other suggestion do you still treat her as you did 10 years ago do you bring her gifts when they aren't necessary, do you go out on dates. You have to keep romance in your life always.
2007-01-03 03:54:00 · answer #3 · answered by Bunny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, the best thing in life is to break up. Why would you want to hold on to a woman who won't let go of the past and won't talk to anyone? You may not realize it, but you are better off without this person. Stop worrying yourself and hoping she'll stay. Thank your lucky stars she's leaving!
There are laws to protect against you not seeing your daughter, so don't worry about that either. Be free of this zombie and live again.
2007-01-03 03:52:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your marriage isn't going to be saved on line. You should ask her to see a marriage concelor, and regardless of her answer start seing one yourself. Your daughter deserves the very best parenting, and that means level headed adults who are not consumed by winning and loosing arguements with each other. If you do not have a spiritual life, this can hamper a couples ability to stay focused on the strengthing the family and instead support finding 'individual happiness' since there is not higher authority. Best of Luck
2007-01-03 05:05:57 · answer #5 · answered by Mermzie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did she leave?? She must really be hurt, to leave u after 10 loong years! There must be a misunderstanding.
U have to try n talk to her directly and when u do, first listen to what she has to say, think about it, find out where u went wrong and then answer her. Remember that ur little girl is the one suffering the most, more than both of u.
2007-01-03 04:02:10 · answer #6 · answered by goair 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes a person falls out of love and there is really nothing you can do about it. It hurts real bad but if a husband or wife decides they just dont love you anymore and want to leave, the best thing you can do is let them go. Cause if you dont, you will be used and you'll feel helpless and miserable, knowing that they are with you but they really dont want to be. Let her go.
2007-01-03 03:47:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her, that you want to work on your marriage, and be a better husband, and just read on some web site, winning the heart of a wife, reconciled marraiges, and books Love must be tough by James Dobson, and many other resources.
Tell her give your family a chance, and not let go so quickly.
fnd out why she is so deeply hurted by you, is she emotionally negected by you, are you a workaholic? did you avoid her, while marry to her, did you make frineds, or hobby more important than her.
examine your marriage, and fight for it!
2007-01-03 03:49:29 · answer #8 · answered by ourjacobdavid 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What happened to your marriage......you and her have to discover what went wrong......there must be love in the first place when the both of you got married.....was she facing stress when she brought up her daughter and you didn't help her......if she's not gonna talk to anyone.....then it's your job to ask her nicely as to what could be done to make the situation better.....if she doesn't say anything today...keep asking her nicely every day or night.....good luck....making a marriage work needs alot of understanding and sacrificing.....
2007-01-03 03:52:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Romance, flowers, candles, a trip away for just the two of you and date night once a week and agree not to talk about work. Also have family board game night, no tv. Have her find ways to vent her stress about work. But most importantly you both have to communicate.
2007-01-03 05:23:55 · answer #10 · answered by Mustang Sally 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋