i know im 13, and yes people might think im too young to know im bi well i been attrated to both sexs like since i was like 8 "sigh", and im so afraid to tell anyone about this,and my friends want to kick anyones *** whose homosexual so now im absolutely afraid, whow can i change?
2007-01-02 23:38:34 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Whether or not you are too young, you are still experiencing the symptoms of being bisexual.
There is nothing - absolutely nothing - wrong with being bi. There is nothing that you will be able to do to go about changing it, either - unless you are not really bi and still in a stage of development and self-realisation (that's only something you'll find out over time).
As for people's attitudes... some "monosexuals" think that bisexuals are untrustworthy and unfaithful or that they spread diseases... this is just ignorance, on their part. Much like your homophobic friends are being ignorant. What difference does it make to them that you may be different (they're your friends now, right? So what'll change if or when they find out about you?)
At 13 though, you're not likely to be entering into a relationship with someone - so you don't have to worry about what others think, just yet. When you're a little older and more confident about yourself, you won't care as much what others say - because you'll know who are your real friends (sexual orientation doesn't matter to real friends - because they are friends, not lovers).
We are a varied bunch! Many of us settle into a lifelong relationship with a single partner, it's just that we don't care if that partner is male or female.
Others of us manage to have open and honest relationships with multiple partners, at the same time. Everyone committed to each other.
Sometimes, people feel threatened by others who choose to live their lives differently (For example, does your town have a scary old man or woman who lives alone in a big house? What do children say about them). This is their problem - not the person who chooses to live their life differently.
Put sex, sexuality and sexual orientation out of your mind, just now. The harder you work on learning stuff at school, the better you'll be able to make a good life for yourself, the way you want to live it.
2007-01-03 02:17:57 · answer #1 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh, what ever (or more likely whomever) made you think that it is degrading to be bisexual? There is nothing wrong with you. There are many people out there who are going through just what you are going through. I for one have known that I have had a "twist" in my life since I was six. I came out to my mother as a bisexual 2 years ago, and while it was very very hard, it was like i could finally breath. I didnt want to keep living my life as a lie.
Alas, many people dont see it that way. Being bisexual, or omnisexual causes many problems amongst other people. For one, many see it as a phase of life. I can't tell you how the phrase "just experimenting" annoys the hell out of me. Second, ultimately coupled people want to see a coupled world, whether it is heterosexual, or homosexual based. Where do bisexual people fit if they like both sexes? My mom is convinced that there is no way that i would ever get married, becuase I cant marry both a man and a woman. Finally, society views bisexuality as being sexually irresponsible. It has the stigma of, if you cant be happy with just one why are you going after the other too? Sadly, it can be the hardest. I have been harassed by my family, "friends", and coworkers, all because they think i am this sex hound, when in reality, I dont sleep around all that much.
It sounds worse than what it really is though. If you are living in a small town where people are very closed minded, then wait a couple years until you graduate high school, move to a city, and talk to cityfolk. More than likely, you will get a brand new perspective on the whole issue, and maybe find some friends who share your attraction. I sure did and in all my life has been blessed for it.
2007-01-03 08:38:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Actually you are a bit young to know. Wait a couple of years and don't say anything. Life will become more clear later. Then ask again, there are places for help! Which ever way it goes, don't worry, you will have millions and millions of people just like yourself to keep company with. Study now, learn a lot, get a good job, and you'll lead a happy life in the future.
When you understand your sexuality you will see that it is not degrading. It is what you are. It is how God made you, and God doesn't make mistakes. Don't let the wild eyed crazies tell you differently
2007-01-03 07:47:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's degrading because your never accepted by anyone...
Lesbians/Gays don't ever truly accept you and Straight people don't either.
Most people think if they marry a Bi person they will end up leaving them for another person. In both cases Gay - they assume you will one day wake up and say sorry I'm not gay (happens).
And straight people - They think one day you may leave and say oh sorry I'm gay.
Best you just fall in love with whoever you wish.
If you fall in love with a man then you don't necessarily need to tell everyone your Bi, if you fall for the same sex just go with what your heart feels right at the time.... etc
And your so young, so it's not compulsory to tell everyone your Bi at the moment you would be in the category of Curious.. and you may well be just Bi but noone will notice that your Bi so no need to change a thing there is nothing wrong with you. Just don't mention it to your creepy friend.
2007-01-03 07:41:09 · answer #4 · answered by valley_storm 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Put quite simply, nothing about being bi is degrading. period
There are people who will believe there is, but that is something wrong in them.
Some Gay/Lesbians find it threatening, either because they don't understand it and view it through their own experiences of denial of who they were, or because they feel it gives the religious right some handle on saying that sexuality is a choice. It isn't. Your's wasn't. Mine wasn't. We are who we are.
Being Bi means you don't have the pressure to come out that Gay and Lesbian folk do. I think some resent that.
Some Gay and Lesbian folk believe that if your Bi it means if you're in a relationship with them you will leave them for the opposite gender (see my final paragraph). Why the opposite gender scares them more than another of the same gender, I don't know.
On the straight side, they don't see you as different from Gay/Lesbian, especially if they don't like Gay/Lesbian people.
People that are extremely homophobic are generally very insecure about their own sexuality. I usually avoid them until they come to terms with who they are or until they grow up.
You are who you are. Choose to tell who you wish. Don't be ashamed of who you are, so long as you treat others the way you wish to be treated and act honorably. Who you are attracted to and who you ultimately sleep with is only the business of you and those you love.
I was very open about my sexuality with my wife, back when I first started dating her. Also about the fact I was polyamorous. I've been with her for 30 years, married 27 of them.
2007-01-03 09:15:58 · answer #5 · answered by Radagast97 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've known since you were eight... I mean, how can you possibly change that? Simple. You can't. You are who you are, and if your "friends" (notice the quotes) actually are like that, then you should consider not hanging out with them anymore. Close-minded people like that are ultimately just going to drag you down. When you get to high school, I'm sure you'll feel much more secure and proud to be someone different and outside of the BORING norms of society. If everyone strove to be "normal," then this world as we know it wouldn't have existed.
For now, just don't worry about it. I guarantee you that you'll feel much better about it later in life. I know I'm glad that I'm omnisexual... I love being omni! It's who I am, and I love me (okay, maybe I'm a bit self-absorbed...). lol
2007-01-03 07:45:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dearest T Claire:
Please don't worry as you get older, it gets better as far as people accepting you. Your age is the hardest age of all as far as peer harassment. One's orientation isn't any better than any other gays and lesbians aren't better than being bi-sexual - just like being straight isn't better than being any other orientation. Be true to yourself and be a good person and you will go far. I know you probably feel isolated and different but you are not. There are a lot of us who have lived in your shoes and we made it through okay --- and you will too!
Let me reiterate be the best "YOU" you can be and you will help change the world.
Sending a big hug!
2007-01-03 08:04:41 · answer #7 · answered by The It Girl ∆☻乐 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't change your sexual orientation. You are, however, still young and still under your parents control so it may be wise to just play it straight for now. If you really need help on this maybe you should contact the PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays).. They deal with these situations everyday and everyone of them just about is the parent of a gay child. They have resources. Ask them for help.
2007-01-03 08:29:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
one of the hardest things about the homosexual lifestyle is the rejection, and shame involved. People will hurt you, or use you. I am a christian, but not one that believes you are going to hell for being gay alone. The greatest comfort in life is knowing the "man" who died on the cross, and letting Him heal your heart of the past issues you have. Despite what the church may tell you, his forgiveness is real. His healing is real. His LOVE is real. If you are looking for a relationship, Look for a relationship with your heavenly Father, through Jesus Christ.
2007-01-03 07:45:09 · answer #9 · answered by didjlord 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Live and learn. Just play safe. Don't worry about what everyone else thinks. I dont agree to bisexuality but that is my opinion. Some dont agree with lesbianism, so what. See...opinions are like a$$holes, everyone has one. Be open about your sexuality with whomever you are sexually involved with. And dont refer to yourself as "bisexual" use the term 'predisposed' (look it up)or how about your name. Your sexuality does not define who you are (I hoe not) YOU DO! And I'm sure there is alot more to you that just the bisexual chic. And if not, you shouldn't be on yahoo answers, you should be reading a book!
2007-01-03 09:56:51 · answer #10 · answered by LDS 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋