I need advice about domestic violence???

Question

I have a friend who's baby's mother called the police on him over domestic violence. I'm not sure but she says he choked her. She's a little crazy and she says she just wanted to teach him a lesson by sending him to jail and he went to jail but, she loves him and doesn't want to press charge's because she "loves him too much and it was just to teach him a lesson." But, now the I think the DA wants to press charges.They've signed up for counseling and he is truly scared straight and he wants to get help for his anger issues. What can happend to him? He still has to go to court. I live in Southern California.. THANKSS

Answer 1

You're never going to know the truth about what happened and what they really intend to do (if anything) to straighten themselves out. Do your best not to follow their example of dischord and chaos. You don't need that in your own life.

Answer 2

Being That The Cops Came To The Place They Were And Believed He Hit Her The State Can Press Charges If She Don't.The Charges Stand The Same Even If She Goes To Court And Says He Didn't Do It.But If He Is Out And Getting Help On His Own That Will Look Better To The Judge..Have Him Bring Proof To Court..

Answer 3

If he hurt her then he deserves to pay the piper. If she tries to help him get out of it then he has won. Guys like that do not change over night, if you check his back ground you may discover that he is from an abusive family and there is reason to let him have his day in court. If it is his first offense and he is truly in counseling then the judge will take all into consideration. You can talk to the DA but odds are they have more information about him then you do. Once again the only way to help him is to let him pay the price for his actions and if he is a good guy he will understand and respect your decision. Best of luck to you.

Answer 4

Domestic Abuse and Violence are the #1 causes for the POLICE to keep their jobs. No one can be scared straight from abuse. Domestic abuse is a learned trait that is passed on from generation to generation----yes one can break the cycle but it is a difficult cycle to break out of!

Counseling will help but unless the counseling and it's lessons are learned and practiced the abuse cycle will continue.

Love has nothing to do with abuse----Women are daily murdered in the US because their man loved them to much!!

I am a survivor or one of those lovely men!! After 10 years of physical, verbal and mental abuse I left this man. When I left I was sporting a black right eye and a black /blue right arm that was blue from my shoulder to my wrist! My 5 year old also was sporting a large hand print on his right cheek that didn't go away for nearly a month! How a lived thru the 10 years of violence is beyond me. GRACE of GOD was with me!

Answer 5

Hello! In the state of California once the victim of domestic violence decides to press charges there is little he/she can do to drop them... it is up to the DA. They treat domestic violence cases like this becaus the victim often changes his/her mind about pressing charges ... often under pressure by the assailant or the assailants family. If he pleads guilty he'll have a record and may be required to go to anger management class every week for several months and he'll have to pay for it. I'm speaking from with my own experience with my soon to be ex-husband. We were dealing with the Alameda County Superior Court ( NorCal)

Answer 6

The female who pressed the charges and lied, well she needs to own up to the truth and suffer the consequences of filing a false police report. He could go to jail for 6 months in most states. What a shame. There are women in this world truly being abused and one wants to use this as a tool for revenge. Grow up, this is so pathetic. He will have a criminal record following him the rest of his life. Girlfriend needs to tell the truth and suffer the consequences of her behaviors that is what really needs to happen. God bless****

Answer 7

Well going to counsling is a first step, the state can pick up the charges,depending upon the severity of the choking. He should talk to a lawyer if this is his first time they may dismiss the charges,and order him into counsling, he may even have to do community service.It varies State to State, and another factor is who the Judge is and what has happened in previous cases with other people how the Judge handled it. If she doesn't show up for the hearing and pursue the charges they may also drop them.Tell him to seek counsling,first time visits are free in most cases.

Answer 8

Bad Behaviour journeys deep into the minds of offenders - exploring the sometimes shocking choices they have made and challenging them with issues of personal responsibility. Hurting People, the most disturbing, and how one human being can reach the stage where he or she is able to hurt, even kill another. Each with a very different motivation for committing his or her crime.
Anger women can show a wide range of emotions from sadness and fear to grief and remorse, anger is the only emotion men know how to express, The way we live today, opens the door to frustration and rage Anger.
When you compliment your spouse, you are shining the spotlight on him or her; Giving honour that is deserved helps build a good relationship, It also takes courage and real humility for each marriage partner to realistically accept personal blame in an appropriate manner for his or her shortcomings and offences; Both husband and wife should learn to show not only a supportive but also a sacrificing and healing attitude toward the other over the course of the marriage; the two most important phrases in a marriage relationship.
When a relationship goes on the rocks, it's rarely because the husband and wife picked the wrong mate. True love grows through caring for each other in a selfless, and sometimes self-sacrificing, manner where each spouse freely gives of himself or herself; True love matures through living experiences.

Answer 9

1) he needs to be scared so he can learn to control himself and to follow through with the anger management.

2) How is the DA going to prosecute if the wife refuses to testify? If they can, there must be more evidence than what your aware of.

3) MYOB it is best if just watch it play out and say yea that sucks.

Answer 10

I'm not sure what exactly are you asking since you didn't pose a question...
If he is violent...love him or not he need to go to jail
If you made it up to teach him a lesson.... you need to go to jail for wasting MY tax dollars on your domestic crap