I told my brother's wife, don't call her husband(my brother) by name, it doesn't look good,infront of me or parents, then she statred arguing with me, there are some other instances where, she was not wearing the sarees,propperly and it was looking odd, the way it should be in front of the elder peoples, i told her again, and she didn't listen. There are some other occasion, when she has shown the aggresive attitude.My brother doesn't say any thing to her, probably she fights if he will say the same,thats why i told all those things, and now my brother and she is not continuing any relation to me.She is also very reluctant in wearing sarees, multiple times i have told my brother and her both,but she didn't wear.I asked my brother to do some thing for this, he tried for some time, now he also doesn't say any thing to her, and she does what she wants.Please suggest.
2007-01-02 21:52:03 · 19 answers · asked by yjph 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Does this bother the parents too? And your husband also? Perhaps the parents, you and your husband could talk to them together and tell them how you ALL feel about this...at the same time. Tell her that what she and your brother do in their own home is their business but when she is at the parents house or your house she should try and respect the rules and customs of the parents house and of your household.
Any guest in anybody's home should try to not offend their host.
You've already said what you have to say. Now it's time for your parents, and your husband to talk to your brother. You should be there, but remain quiet as much as possible so they know that this is how your parents feel about this situation.
If your parents won't agree to have a conversation with him about his wife, I'm afraid there's not much you can do. If her behavior is causing you and your husband problems in your community and with your friends, then perhaps it's best if they don't continue any relation to you or your husband.
2007-01-02 22:20:27 · answer #1 · answered by brittany 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You were right for hanging up. Tell her that when she is ready to talk like a sensible adult then she need to come over. You guys need to talk face to face, not over the phone. Make her come to you because it seems she wants to play cat and mouse and maybe she will think twice about running away since she has some distance to travel from where she is living. Don't keep giving in to her childish ways. Tell her that when she is ready to sit down and talk like a real woman that you will be there or NOT! Either she wants the marriage to work or she doesn't, so tell her just that! By the way, I am a woman. And for those that say think about your kids, you can still love and support your kids regardless if you are with there mother or not. Knowone should be miserable in a marriage if it's not working it's just not working, Sometimes we hate to divorce but if it's causing grief among the two of you then just get a divorce and take care of your kids.
2016-05-22 22:23:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are being way too nosey. Your brother married her, not you! If you are upset with how their relationship is, turn your eyes elsewhere. I understand that every culture is different but here you sit on a computer which means that you are aware their is a world besides that which you were brought up with. If you feel your brother's wife is disrespecting him, then you can talk to him about it privately but to start fights with his wife is just going to cause more in the marriage.
Are you more upset that she is fighting with you- how dare she! Or are you more upset with how she treats your brother? If you are upset that she doesn't bend to your every will, get over it. If you are upset that she is mistreating your brother, then talk to him provately.
Once again, it is not your job to tell your brother how to take care of his marriage. Get married yourself and then have your family start to put you under a microscope- you'll see how it feels yourself. Step into the century my friend. If your brother's new wife is not following your culture, maybe she is unequally bonded to your brother and that would be his call- not yours.
2007-01-02 22:00:02 · answer #3 · answered by TrixyLoo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My suggestion to you is to stay out of there affairs. He is a grown man or he wouldn't be married. And if you keep butting into there business he will soon start resenting you. What you can do is be an example bring your wife around her and let your sister-in law see the proper behavior from your wife. Learn to lead by example, and it wouldn't hurt if you ask family members to compliment your wife in your sister-in laws presence. When she notices your wife being praised for displaying the correct behavior, it may encourage her to act accordingly. That is if she's willing to change?
2007-01-02 22:05:06 · answer #4 · answered by Sha T 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The bible states that you shouldnt come between two in a quarrel or they will both turn on you. You do need to stay out of it. If it were in your house I could see you saying something, but its between your brother and his wife, like it or not they are to have the stronger relationship than you and him, remember he said he would forsake all others, that includes you dude.
2007-01-02 22:02:16 · answer #5 · answered by Justice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're a bossy and controlling. If she doesn't want to wear a Saree and it's not in HER customs too... than you have no right to tell her that she must. And if she wants to call her husband by his first name she can. It sounds like you need to stop being rude to her. I don't think I'd like my sister-in-law to tell me what to do either. You are not her parent. You are not her master. Leave her alone. Maybe YOU SHOULD APOLOGIZE for being so impolite and making her feel uncomfortable. You should welcome her into your family with love, not judgment, and you should accept others with their differences.
2007-01-02 22:00:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want reasonable answers then be reasonable in your question. A wife not being able to call her husband by name.
You are meddling in your brothers marriage, stay the hell out of it.
I think the "attitude" problem is yours, not your brothers wife's.
2007-01-02 22:04:51 · answer #7 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here it is..............................IT'S YOUR BROTHER'S WIFE, HE MARRIED HER, NOT YOU OR YOUR PARENTS!!! I understand that some cultures have certain "rules" or guidelines, as with religion, etc., it's up to the individual. My guess is that your brother knew of your sister in laws independent ways of thiniking before he married her. Some times you just have to mind your own business, if it is disrespectful to you, tell her once, then leave it alone, it's up to her to make her own decisions, she's an adult, it's not your job to make her decisions, nor your brother's decisions for that matter. There are more important things to worry about in this life than clothes and calling someone by their name!!!!
2007-01-03 00:46:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
How would you like to wear a saree and be told what you should look like and act like in your marriage? My guess would be you would be angry too.
2007-01-02 22:12:25 · answer #9 · answered by Simone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah religon related issues...I must keep my mouth shut so as not to offend you with my true oppinion....except...oh dear...I can't resist....maybe she doesn't believe as you do, the world is full of different beliefs, most of which don't require their women to wear certain things and act meek.
2007-01-02 21:55:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋