is he cheating ?

Question

i have been going out with my boyfreind for 4 years hes never trusted me. i found him on msn chatting to some girls and i wasnt pleased. well he would have gone mad if that was me. we argued for ages and he told me that he trusts me now and that i should chill out coz he wasnt doin anything wrong. isnt it strange that he finally decided to trust me after all this time. i think theres something going on do you.

Answer 1

most definitely cheating in one way or another. that trust he told you he had was the "TRUST OF GUILT"
put his miraculous trust to the test, and see what happens.
start by chatting to guys on msn, if he still trusts you then try
dressing your best and going out.
if he freaks out at any of these then you know he is just another
f*** face and dump the 2 faced, lying good for nothing f***y
if his trust is still there then i would doubt that you have nothing to worry about. but always be cautious to what he does

Answer 2

Look I just got out of an awful relationship with my ex of a year and a half. He cheated on me. I know the in's and out's of a cheating man. The only reason why he is telling you that he trusts you is because he knows that he was or is doing something wrong and he wants you off his back . Therefore he is feeding you b.s so that he has you thinking about something else. He figured that if he says "oh I trusts you now" that you will let him off the hook and not interigate him. Now I obviously could be wrong as anyone else other than him can be about this but one thing I have learned is that a woman's intuition is the most accurate inner gut truth. I would stick with it. You said it yourself ; If you were caught doing what he was doing then you were gonna be facing hell. My question is, if he believes that this is so wrong and that you are in the wrong doing if you were to do this then why is he allowing himself to do it???.....unless he thought that you were not gonna find out. Step yourself out of the box and think, what advice would I be giving my best friend if this was happening to her and she were in this same situation. Lemme know what happens... G'Luck sweetie

Answer 3

I would have to say that, if you bf had issues trusting you in the past, but has finally come to terms with the fact that he can trust you, now you have caught him out on msn I have to say that makes alarm bells ring in my head! You see he is now frightened of being caught out, so he is desperately trying to convince you that you should be ok with his actions. Think of the reverse situation..... And if you had try to pacify him with the same words.... Would it wash? I don't think so. I am sorry but there is something not right goig on, whether he is cheating physically or not I do not know but mentally he is. He is sat chatting to other females, which is ok if they are friends and have been always but if they are new female friends I would have to say not good.

I always followed the rules in life, that whoever I was with I would accept their friends and when I say that I mean trusted friends that have always been around, if my guy then starting making new female friends other than work colleagues at work, I would have to be worried. Unless it was a joint new friendship. I think the same of the reverse to as I would not expect my guy to accept me making new bloke mates and suddenlt start going out for a beer or cinema with them. Its not right.. Sorry .

Answer 4

Usually a guilty person will accuse you of what he/she is doing. I was in a relationship like yours and it only gets worse. Yes he is doing something. He cheated on you when he was talking to other women on MSN. He was caught and he says he trust you now so he can keep on doing what he is and you are suppose to trust him even though he is talking to other women. Get Out now you have wasted too much time. I have been there and he is sneaky and you will never trust him. Go by your instinct!

Answer 5

he's only chatting online...give him a break....it's not like he's out every night screwing girls....you two need to grow up a little bit more, theres obviously a trust issue here that both of you need to sort out....and there must be a reason to why he didn't trust you before...he's not doing anything wrong...he's at home, in his own surroundings having a chat with friends he's made online, whats the problem

Answer 6

It seems to me that you need attention, negative attention from him validates to you that he cares (probably turns u on when you argue with him....think about it). now that he has gotten tired of this game and chooses to have more meaningful conversations or should i say different then arguing with you you feel slighted cause it's not all about you anymore. He's not cheating (yet) it could turnout that way if you 2 dont find another way(positive) to validate and confirm your love for one another. I really dont believe he's cheating in fact hes probably discussing his relationship with you with his online friends...for now. he could be learning not to be so entrusting of you or just realized from chatting with these friends that he's not entrusting of you at all and will stop arguing, not knowing this is the very thing that turns you on....now your frustrated, thus your accusing him of cheating which starts the argument, which gets you mad, which gets your adrenaline pumping, which gets you excited and turned on. ask yourself if you do things intentionally to cause him to distrust you?
look at yourself first for the problem (honestly) before pointing the finger at him. (you might just be into some unconventional ways of passion or stimulation) you both need to explore this more

Answer 7

Why weren't you happy he was talking to females online? Was he flirting with them? If he wasn't, and was only talking, you need to sort your issues out. It is strange that he said he trusts you now when confronted with something, but that doesn't mean he's cheating. You're just being too possessive if you never want him to talk to a female again.

Answer 8

He could be...or maybe not...

You could perceive chatting with other girls as cheating, but that's up to you.

I guess the only way to find out is to check the chatlog. If he doesn't know you can save the chatlog, then you could change the setting, so you can read back what he's talking about.

Good chance that if he is, you'll find some hint(s) in his logs.

Answer 9

The mere fact that he is able to suddenly trust you after distrusting you reflects the answer - he doesn't trust himself - therefore I think it's highly likely that even if he hasn't cheated he'd like to cheat if he got the chance but perhaps hasn't quite had the opportunity yet. Keep an eye on him.

Answer 10

Definitely something going on. Why is he chatting to girls on msn?