I have had two children...the most recent was 13 yrs ago. I remember breast feeding for about 3 months with each child. It was hard. It was demanding, uncomfortable and messy as hell (leaking all the time).
Now after all these years Im about to have another baby. My fiance is no longer in my life (cheating dawg). I have no help in this city, no family, no spouse. Just a difficult teenager I must contend with each day....and very very soon a newborn too
These days they tell you to breastfeed..and make you feel guilty if you dont...but for the first time tonight Im considering that maybe it isnt the best thing for me. Making up a days worth of bottles is so much easier...and then I know how much baby is getting.
I honestly dont think I can handle months of sleep deprevation (feeding every 2 hrs or so). Being on my own is hard enough.
Im afraid of falling to depression as it is. Maybe everything will be fine, but who knows
Its ok NOT to breastfeed right?
2007-01-02 19:14:52 · 32 answers · asked by paradox is interesting 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
My mom never breastfed me...AND I have no health problems...I was even born 4lbs 8 oz and 4 weeks early !
2007-01-02 19:20:42 · update #1
1st Congrats on the baby. It's stressful, but wonderful and well worth it. I'm sure you'll be a great mom no matter how you chose to feed your baby.
I've done both, my oldest was breastfed until 5 1/2 months, then he was formula fed until 1 year. It is much easier and less stressful to breastfeed. (esp since breastfeeding releases anti-stress hormones) No bottles to fix, measure, tote around, lose under a bed and find two months later (yuck!--we all do it!! LOL), no bottles to wash, new nipples to boil, no worries about the waater supply, no worries about formula. And it's less expensive--extra food for mom cost avg of $600/year--breast pump $0-$200 one time investment--less sickness for baby = money saved on missed work, medication and doctor visits. Breastfed bbies are 10 times less likely to be admitted to the hospital during the first year!
My 6 week old sleeps with me. Now every baby is different, but since he was 3 weeks old he wakes 2-4 times a night. With him in the bed with me, all I have to do to feed him is lift my shirt and insert boob in mouth, he drinks his meal and we both drift back off to sleep. Did you know that the act of nursing your infant releases hormones that make you calm and put you back to sleep much faster! I swear I lose less sleep (after the first few weeks) breastfeeding! No need to get up out of bed, into the kitchen, mix/heat a bottle, ect
As for the depression, did you know breastfeeding can help with that? Breastfeeding boosts prolactin and oxytocin, the "mothering hormones" (Prolactin is a hormone that enhances feelings of nurturing and contentment and helps you feel relaxed, loving, and calm.) Prolactin levels can increase 10-20 fold within 30 minutes of beginning a nursing session, thus breastfeeding reduceses the rate of PPD!
As for the leaking--nursing pads take care of that problem. You can buy disposable which is like a panty liner for your bra (you can view the product here http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=3358) or washable, witch are round cotton pads inserted into your bra, and the you can wash and reuse. No mess!
Commit to do it for 8 weeks--which is the hardest time. With latch issues, worries about supply (usually unfounded, sore nipples) If you can make ut throughthe 1st eight weeks, you can make it a year!
I tell you all this, not to judge you or make you feel guilty for not breastfeeding but so you will have the facts. And breatfeeding will surely be easier for you to get the hang of since you have done it before!
Here are some reasons to breastfeed I give to my clients--
The benefits of breastfeeding--
http://www.promom.org/101/ http://www.parentingweb.com/lounge/whybf.htm
http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/895_brstfeed.html
http://www.motheringfromtheheart.com/Benefits.htm
Find Local LLL http://www.llli.org/WebIndex.html
Breast milk contains at least 100 (some sources say up to 400) ingredients not found in formula including at least 4 unique proteins.
Breast milk: contains unique and powerful immune building properties that can enhance brain development, contains (80 percent of cells) macrophages, cells that kill bacteria, fungi and viruses, contains endorphins (chemicals that suppress pain), provides baby with an unequaled immunity against viruses and bacteria, always has the right proportions of fat, carbohydrates, enzymes and protein as well as numerous other components, is a living substance, is individually tailored for each woman’s own baby, changes constantly - both during a feed and day by day - to meet her baby's evolving needs, contains antibodies produced when a mother is exposed to pathogens in the environment, the mother's antibodies are then passed on to her baby via her breast milk.
There are 4,000 species of mammals, and they all make a different milk. Human milk is made for humanS and it meets all their specific nutrient needs. Breast milk is created by the human body to feed human babies. It is perfectly formulated for the nutritional needs of human babies AND TODDLERS. Cow's milk is created by cows to feed calves. It is perfectly formulated for the nutritional needs of calves.
Breastfed babies: have higher I.Q. scores, produce more antibodies in response to immunizations, are 10 times less likely to be admitted to the hospital during the first year, have up to 50% fewer ear infections than bottle fed babies, are one-third less likely to die of SIDS,
Breastfed babies have a much lower incidence of: colic, gas, spitting up, wheezing, prolonged colds, diarrhea, vomiting, pneumonia, botulism, bronchitis, staphylococcal infections, influenza, German measles, childhood cancers, bronchitis, bronchiolitis, pneumonia, diabetes, asthma, cardiopulmonary disturbances, diaper rashes, stomach infections, cavities, asthma, colitis, rheumatoid arthritis, obesity, food allergies & eczema Also, women who were breastfed as infants, even if only for a short time, showed an approximate 25% lower risk of developing pre-menopausal or postmenopausal breast cancer, compared to women who were bottle-fed as an infant.
Breastfeeding: can raise your child's I.Q. and there are numerous studies pointing to higher developmental test scores in breastfed children, enhance the baby's development of oral muscles and facial bones--promotes good jaw development as well. It's harder work to get milk out of a breast than a bottle, and the exercise strengthens the jaws and encourages the growth of straight, healthy teeth.
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BReastfeeding also benefits the mother:
Breastfeeding mothers have lower rates of certain cancers (breast, ovarian, uterine, and endometrial) as well as a reduced risk of osteoporosis. Breastfeeding encourages uterine contractions after childbirth, returning the uterus to it's pre-pregnancy size much faster. It has been shown that the uteruses of formula feeding mothers sometimes never return to the pre-pregnancy state.
Breastfeeding also: Boosts prolactin and oxytocin, the "mothering hormones" (Prolactin is a hormone that enhances feelings of nurturing and contentment and helps you feel relaxed, loving, and calm.) Prolactin levels can increase 10-20 fold within 30 minutes of beginning a nursing session, thus breastfeeding reduceses the rate of PPD, A nursing mother is forced to get needed rest, speeds up post-partum weight loss, helps child spacing, boosts women's self-reliance and self esteem by meeting the needs of their infants, they increase their confidence in their ability parent and nurture, reduces women's dependence on medical professionals and validates the tried and trusted knowledge that mothers and midwives have about infant care and feeding, is easier and less time consuming. There is no preparation involved, and you don't have to prepare, warm, or transport bottles, provides extra closeness that helps your baby bond and develop trust. The skin-to-skin contact offered by breastfeeding reduces the stress babies experience when they enter the world from the warmth and safety of the womb. Breastfeeding provides comfort during illness or pain.
Breastfeeding mothers bleed less after childbirth, lose less blood during the chaotic days of early motherhood, because breastfeeding suppresses menstruation, are at lower risk for hip fracture after menopause
Formula is an industrially manufactured food. It contains chemicals, flavoring, vitamins, and proteins that attempt to replicate breast milk. The multiple processings, ingredients and alterations required to convert cows milk or soy beans to the finished product opens up numerous opportunities for contamination by harmful bacteria, chemicals, insects, and foreign bodies. There were twenty-two different recalls of infant formula in the United States because of health and safety problems between 1982 and 1994, . Seven of these recalls were classified as "Class I" (potentially life threatening) by the FDA. In random testing, a number of lab-tested infant formulas have been found to contain bacterial and elemental contaminants. Human milk straight from the breast is always sterile and No babies are allergic to their mother's milk
Yet, in today's society, breastfeeding is often thought of as unnecessary. Young mothers are mistakenly led to believe that formula does very well as a replacement for breastmilk. It emphatically does not! Nothing can duplicate the properties of breastmilk, no matter how many vitamins, minerals and supplements are added to what is basically a chemical formulation.
About 70 percent of mothers start breastfeeding immediately after birth, but less than 20 percent of those moms are breastfeeding exclusively six months later. I believe this is because, like I was with my 1st child, they are uneducated, uninformed and lack the proper support to build a good supply and a strong nursing relationship with their child. I hope to pass along to other mothers the knowledge and experience I have gained to benefit both mother and child. I hope to strengthen the mothers confidence in herself and her body and to help her provide the best start in life for her child.
2007-01-03 02:20:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Just had a baby via c-section, am in pain and have very little patience to breastfeed - I tried breastfeeding the first few days in the hospital but the incision pain was unbearable and I needed to rest. I opted for formula - the day I went home, I tried using a pump and it has worked wonders since I don't need to force my child on my breast which takes forever. He gets a "mixed" feeding which seems to work so well since I am not producing enough milk yet to last for the whole day but at the same time he is getting some antibodies from my own milk. I am slowly transitioning him to expressed breastmilk later on if and when I produce enough milk supply.
I guess my point is, don't cross out all your options, but at the same time, it is your choice. The nurses at the hospital made me feel really bad for not being able to hold my child and breastfeed him right away. If bottle works for you, then do it. However, if you are alone with no help, breastfeeding or expressing milk might be cheaper and more convenient. Pumping them every couple of hours and storing them in bottles is as good as formula (in fact formula expires faster in the fridge). You wake up every two hours or so anyway once the baby is born - I am sorry to hear about your current situation but there are a lot of support groups out there for single parents. Try researching for them online. Don't lose hope, good luck.
2007-01-02 21:07:28 · answer #2 · answered by the_memory_of_ashes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Breast is best. All the research is out there to prove it. It protects your child from so much. Did you know that when your baby is sick your milk will change to help heal the baby. I have been nursing for 13 years straight with only a 9 month break. I have 5 super healthy children. When they get the cold or flu they have it for only a couple of days. If you nurse on demand your baby will always have enough milk. You need support. Contact a local LaLeche group. They will help you. I never even made a bottle for any of my children. That to me seems so much more work. With nursing the milk is always ready, always the right temperature. And it costs nothing! Formula is expensive and the babies don't handle it well. Is it ok not to breastfeed? That is up to you. Keep the baby is bed with you and nursing is so easy at night. Good luck to you.
2007-01-02 19:43:33 · answer #3 · answered by luvkadcl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It absolutely is OK not to breastfeed. It's up to everyone to decide for themselves how to feed their baby, and sometimes breastfeeding is not right. I look at it like this: If you're not happy, then your baby won't be happy. With my second son, I decide to stop nursing him because he was eating every hour and a half, even at three months! I had planned on breastfeeding for the whole first year. Then with my youngest, Baby Kathryn (11 wks old), I wanted to breastfeed her but dried up in less than a month. She is now drinking formula and is thriving. So don't worry about what your baby eats, only how much.
Also, you could try combing breastfeeding with formula feeding. That way you can possibly sleep a little more at night and still give some of the benefits from breastmilk. Whatever you decide, remember that it is YOUR decision, and don't let anyone make you feel bad if you choose not to breastfeed.
By the way, congratulations on the new baby
2007-01-02 19:30:37 · answer #4 · answered by Lynnea 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is DEFNITELY ok not to breastfeed. It is a PERSONAL choice. If your circumstances prevent you from really having a loving breastfeeding relationship, then don't do it! If you feel that a loving bond between you and your baby can be accomplished with bottle feeding, than do it! I breastfed my son for a month but had to discontinue due to health problems (mine, not his). I personally feel very close to my son even though he is not at my breast for each meal. So I say whatever will make you and he most happy (When Mom is happy, babies are happy) is the method which you should chose. Your baby won't be "unhealthy" as some people have said. Its just as healthy to have a formula fed baby. Studies are negligible either way and are skewed based on who the studies are performed for (Formula companies, or breast feeding advocates). Good luck and best wishes!
2007-01-02 19:34:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's really a choice you will have to make. I tried so hard to breast feed my son, but it just didn't work. He didn't have the proper sucking reflex needed for breast feeding and he couldn't grasp the concept. I tried for 2 weeks, but my son and I were fighting each other...I felt we were having more difficutlies than the "bonding" experience everyone was talking about. I finally asked the Dr if I could pump and feed it in a bottle. That worked for a while, but got more difficult when I went back to work. The demand of my job kept me from being able to pump on time and that combined with spending time in the hospital so much while my grandmother was dying, I completely dried, up.
I can't believe I tried so hard to keep it up. With all that was going on it probably would have been best to just go straight to the formula and a bottle.
Don't let anyone guilt you. Formula's now days are trying their best to get as close to breast milk as possible for the health of your child. If it's not going to work for you, don't push it. You can wear yourself out "trying" just because everyone else says to. If you decide to try, you can always do it for a bit and if it's not working with your teenager and other things in life, then you can stop. But YES it's OK not to breast feed. If it's not for you, it's not for you. My mother in law only breast fed her third child and the first two turned out fine.
2007-01-03 00:42:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was unable to breastfeed my children... no milk. I did have cholostrom, and so I allowed them to suckle the first week or so... but I bottle fed all three of my children because the milk just never came in.
The bonding end of things will be different if you don't make sure to hold that baby tight and look him or her in the eye and spend time talking and quietly touching/playing. I have a friend who has never been close to her daughter ... but she held her on her knee, at arms length while bottle feeding... BIG mstake, in my opinion!
So... YES!! It's OKAY!! You do what you need to do for your life and the baby's life... You make the best decision you can and then you let it go. The guilt will make you feel worse than anything else, if you let it!
BEST of luck to you!!
PS... I hope you're ignoring the guilt-trippers who posted above...
2007-01-02 19:22:10 · answer #7 · answered by Amy S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally think the pressure on mothers to breastfeed is ridiculous. Yes it is healthier for your baby but there is no harm in bottle feeding and there are generations of people to prove that.
It isn't easy to do although it can be rewarding. Reading material on breastfeeding when I had my second child was laughable one article which claimed to tell you how to breastfeed and still get 8 hours sleep advised having a family member come round to do chores while you slept!
It is hard work and although it is natural a lot of the other "natural" things that make it easier are now advised against, like co-sleeping.
You do what is right for you, do not let it get you down when all the books and professionals are screaming breastfeed at you. It will do you child no harm at all if they are bottle fed.
2007-01-02 19:30:08 · answer #8 · answered by chrissie 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Of course it's ok to NOT breastfeed.
I'd much rather have a mother giving me a bottle who had the strength, energy, and attitude to love and care for me without any sort of resentment, than to be bottlefed by a mother who dreaded every feeding.
If you try to do EVERYTHING perfectly, you're just going to end up running yourself into the ground. Pick and choose what is most important for you and your child - yes, people will try to make you feel guilty about it, but if it isn't for one thing, it's for another. As I do bottle and breast (for the same baby), I got it from both sides, believe it or not! You can't please everyone. LOL.
2007-01-03 01:42:04 · answer #9 · answered by katheek77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am a mother to 5 children and i will say i regret not breast feeding my older three i was always on the theory of you carry them for 40 weeks why the bugger would you wanna have them hanging off you for however long. I will admit that i had my fourth child four weeks early and she was in neonatal care for nearly two weeks it was then that i decided that i would breastfeed after being told it would be better for her so when i had my 5 baby i was yep no ? asked breastfed her too and i will say that the bond i have with my last two children is unbreakable. So my advice to you is follow your heart if breastfeeding is for you do it but if it aint then dont let ppl pressure you into doing it. You have to do wat feels right for you and that of your baby good luck and congrads.
2007-01-02 19:35:39 · answer #10 · answered by chantilly550 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is what's best for your baby, there is no denying that, regardless of whether or not people who weren't breastfed are healthy... those who were breastfed are usually healthier. New studies show that having been breastfed benefits ones health for their ENTIRE life. Lower cholesterol rates, better heart health, less risk of obesity, less risk of diabetes, hypertension, chrones disease, allergies, asthma, irritable bowel syndrome, childhood leukemia, lupus, etc. Plus, breastfeeding Moms oftentimes lose weight much more quickly than their counterparts (if they nurse exclusively for the first 6 months)... and the fat is redistributed throughout their body in a more flattering way. Breastfeeding reduces YOUR chances of breast cancer and osteoporosis later in life. And there are studies that show that Mother's who breastfeed are less likely to suffer from Post Partum Depression. (Plus, be sure to eat your Omega-3's to help prevent that as well).
I, personally, found it easier to nurse my baby because I just had him in bed with me to sleep and nursed him on cue. I think I got much more sleep than my bottle feeding counterparts who have to warm milk in the middle of the night or hold a bottle, etc. I just layed there and he cuddled and nursed while I layed on my side... we barely woke up.
Even if you opt not to breastfeed your child... which, of course, is your right. I think it's best to at least give your baby your colostrum for the first couple of weeks... to help protect him/her when he's so little.
I wasn't breastfed. My Mom said she couldn't stand it and didn't want to do it. So... me and my 3 sisters weren't nursed... and, yes, we turned out well. So... I understand that it's just not for some people. You have to do what you know will make you feel the best in your situation with your new little one.
Congratulations on the forthcoming arrival!
2007-01-02 21:12:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋