My hubby had an affair with a family friend of ours. She was my friend and betrayed me. I knwe very much earlier and i could not stop my husband as i was scared if i make it an issue he will leAVE ME. nOW THAT THE GIRL'S HUBBY CAME TO KNOW ABT IT AND HE IS VERY UPSET AND VERY DEPESSED THAT HOW MY HUBBY COULD DO THAT TO HIM, HE HVE HELPED US A LOT AND WAS VERY CLOSE TO US. nOW MY HUBBY REGRETS BUT E IS UNABLE TO STOP COMUNICATING WITH THAT LADY AS I THINK THEY BOTH HAVE SOME FINANCIAL MATTERS THAT THEY ARE IN TOUCH , BUT MY HUBBY HAS PROMISED ME THAT HE WILL NEVER LEAVE ME FOR HER AND MY KIDS UT HER HUSBAND IS ASKING HER TO STOP TALKING TO MY HUBBY AND SHE REFUSES AND KEEP HURTING EHR HUSBAND THAT SHE LOVES MY HUBBY. I AM VERY DOWN ABT THIS AS I NEED A PEACEFUL FMILY AND THIS IS SIN, THAT LADY;S HUBBY KEEP TELLING ME IF HE DIES THAN ONLY THE WIFE WILL BE HAPPY I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO, I HAVE SOIKEN TO MY HUBBY HE KEEP SAYING I JUST TALK ABT WORK BUT HE NEVER REALISE HIS MISTAKES
2007-01-02 16:24:59 · 15 answers · asked by susan r 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get some self-respect and get rid of him.
2007-01-02 17:07:36 · answer #1 · answered by ManOfTheHour 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off.. focus on your family not what happens with her and her hubby. Next give your hubby an ultimatum, either he breaks all ties with this woman or your leaving. Do not be afraid of his answer. I know your hurting and you love him BUT ask yourself this, How committed is he to you and your family ? Not committed at all if he can cheat on you.You and your children deserve better than that. He cheated once that you know of, who's to say he wont do it again, especially since he and this woman are still contacting one another. And even if he never does cheat again.. are you ever going to trust him again ? If you cant trust him why be with him in the first place. For the kids ? No, that will only make a very bitter situation for the children. I grew up in a household where the parents only stayed because they thought it was right for us kids. It was worse on us seeing it everyday. Keep that in mind. What ever you do, I wish you the best and hope everything works out for you.
2007-01-02 16:54:10 · answer #2 · answered by jenny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK you need a divorce or you need to accept this to have peace. I have known women who stay with a cheating husband because of security and I would never knock them. But there are a few things you must do for yourself, ask him to wear a condom when he does you in any form of sex, talk to a counselor, do not talk to the other husband, do not ask your husband about it, always be prepared that he may leave so get a job and save your money in another bank, never talk to her, and find something to do that makes you happy. Adultery is sin and it is a reason to divorce. Think everything out very carefully to be sure you do the right thing that makes only you happy because none of these people are thinking of your happiness. You sound like a good person and you did not deserve this.
2007-01-02 16:45:13 · answer #3 · answered by livlafluv 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same situation I made my husband make up his mind either me or her & no further talking as well he chose me and 2 this day we don't see these people no more.I say he just wants 2 have his cake & eat it 2.He can't have both make him decide & quick or he'll keep cheating on U & that's a Fact he might say they are just talking but I say there is some Hanky Panky going on no joke open your eyes if it continues leave him you'll be better off U might not think so but there's Plenty of Fish out there & Believe me you'll find your Knight & He'll be Your Prince..Good Luck
2007-01-02 16:32:08 · answer #4 · answered by sugarbdp1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How would you like to look at the problem this way. First, if you allow him to continue with this, whose benefitting from the situation and whose at the loss? Second, when will u recognize that u have the right to a happy marriage, do u think you deserve this suffering? Third, u r only looking at the problem on one side, what about the side of the kids, have you realized the impact of all these? Lastly, this is the age fo women empowerment, EXERCISE THEM!!!
2007-01-02 16:42:41 · answer #5 · answered by Lyndajoie T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the best thing to do would be to get a video camera and tape you and the neighbor guy going at it like wild animals. Then you gather the 4 of you together and all sit and watch it. After that you can start negotiations all on even terms.
2007-01-02 16:30:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i was you i would leave him, if he has cheated on you once he will do it again. You didn't mention how long you have been married but it is not worth the pain you are setting yourself up for.
Why are you so scared he will leave you? If he does you sue him for maintanance and thats it . Also get away from these "friends" of yours. It sounds like every one is using you. They are acting like you are stupid. Maybe you should have an affair with your "friends " husband!!
2007-01-02 16:31:20 · answer #7 · answered by TakeNoticeNow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its truly going to be your wifes descision. you may share your techniques and thoughts together with her. permit her comprehend your concerns and concerns, relatively than merely make certain to pass away her. it is going to be very puzzling for her besides. How does she sense approximately it?? regrettably, you may not pass back and use secure practices. Too late for that. you may furnish the toddler the terrific existence you may. I had a splash one at age 17 and did the terrific i could with little money. you're in all probability scared and over whelmed and could consult with you spouse. She would sense the comparable way. you may artwork jointly, regardless of selection you're making. in case you like her and desire your marriage to final, you will come to an settlement. Dont be so rapid to provide up. stable success to you the two
2016-10-19 09:43:45 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So there is a fine mess the lot of you got yourselves into, isn't it?
Look, it seems to me that your husband and his lady friend are not going to stop anytime soon.
You have 2 options.
Get together with HER husband and have a jolly good time
Get a divorce (recommended)
good luck.
2007-01-02 16:43:56 · answer #9 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes he must cut all ties with other women or tell him you will leave.. there is no reason for him to keep in touch with her if hes going to work it out with you.. and as long as he dont cut those ties hes still got a thing for her.. so your best bet if you want to stay and work it out is to demand that and if he cant commit to you then he will never completely commit to you. he wont be trusted and that comes with time and i mean longgggg time.. he would have to prove himself over and over to you untill you feel you can trust him.. could even take a year. hes the one that did the deed hes the one that pay the price if he really wants to work it out.. good luck..
2007-01-02 16:36:34 · answer #10 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE IS A PIG & SO IS SHE.......GET A DIVORCE NOW. FRIENDS DON'T SHARE HUSBANDS. HE IS LYING TO YOU. HE WANTS THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS AND WILL SAY ANYTHING TO KEEP BOTH OF YOU IN BED WITH HIM. THIS IS SIN. OF COURSE YOUR HUBBY'S NOT GOING TO LEAVE YOU CAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE ALLOWING HIM TO KEEP CHEATING. GIVE HIM THE BOOT!! HE'S NOT GOING TO REALIZE ANYTHING UNTIL HE IS WITHOUT HIS FAMILY.
2007-01-02 16:51:01 · answer #11 · answered by REBECCA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋