My Current gurl!!!?

Question

Me n her been together since Dec. 01 2006, and i came back to school on the 2nd. Everything was good until i got back home on the 13th and thats when we started having problems... she practically moved in wit me though she never spent the night in her room nor anywhere else at the time we were havin this constant argument. I would first say that she has lots of male friends that she communicate wit and i feel very uncomfortable wit it. She tells me she'll never cheat on me, but these dudes blow up her phone like everytime and i get frustrated wit it most of the times. i told her to talk to em so they wont be calllin her like everyday cos she got a man now, but each time she gets mad at me tellin her that. And I think i ask her too many questions while she went home for xmas. Questions like "where u at?, what u doing?, who is that dude u was talkin to on the phone, and so on" She gets really pissed and we end up gettin into an argument. Any kinda advice for me so we have a good r/ship

I love this gurl to death and it seem like the only problem we have is the whole dude's calling her and her playing around wit her dude friends... I feel like if someone is in a r/ship, some things got to change. but she's always saying i'm tryna control her life.

Her MOM Gave me lots of advice... that i need to understand that she is 19 and being immature, i should give her some more time and me being more matured that her, she get to understand everything i've been saying, when she's more matured. She said if i wanna stick around with her, i gotta be patient wit her and grow up together wit her... and that i should cut out the whole asking too many damn questions...lol

Answer 1

IT SOUND LIKE YOUR GIRL NEED TO LET HIM KNOW THAT
SHE WITH SOMEONE, THAT THE DEAL. IT ABOUT RESPECT
AND SHE DOES NOT SOUND LIKE SHE GVEN YOU ANY
TIME TO TALK TO HER ABOUT IT OR TIME TO LEAVE IT
ALONG.

Answer 2

As long as you don't have female friends doing the same thing and contacting you, then you have every right to be concerned with her behavior, which would cause any guy in their right mind to worry. Tell her to put the shoe on the other foot. Would she be okay if your female friends contacted you the way hers does? If not, then you need to set some boundaries. If she wants her way and refuses to compromise, there is no basis for a relationship because relationships, especially where love is involved, is all about self-sacrifice and thinking about the other's happiness and doing all you can to make sure they're happy. Talk to her and share your feelings and concerns. If she truly loves and cares for you, she'll change her ways and get her priorities straight. Otherwise, it doesn't seem she's ready for a relationship and you could be spending your time on someone else who is.

Answer 3

Think about how you'd feel if you were one of her friends. Picture yourself as a long-term, trusted friend of this girl. How would you feel when another guy appeared and told you to stop calling her as often, or seeing her? Or if he saw the fact that you and she understand each other as a *bad* thing?

No one wants their friendships imposed upon. Think about the reasons you're uncomfortable with her having close male friends. Is it because you don't trust her to stay loyal to you? Is it because you don't trust them to stay "just friends" with her? Is it because you can't handle competition? Maybe because you're insecure with yourself?

Unless you want to drive this girl insane, I'd try to settle a little bit. To her it's going to look like you're trying to cut her off from all her friends, and make it seem like you want her to choose between you and her friends (and honestly - if this is a new relationship, she's more likely to pick her friends. They've been around longer than you have).

There are no rules when it comes to relationships. Guidelines maybe, or expected behaviour, but no black and white rules. Just because she's with you now, doesn't mean she's required to treat her friends any differently. Asking her to distance herself from her closest friends because it makes you uncomfortable is likely to seem selfish or possessive on your part.

Once you figure out what your reasoning is for the discomfort, try to simply take it on board. If you want the relationship to go anywhere, you'll have to trust her to be faithful. Without that, it's not going to be much of a relationship. Something else to ease your discomfort might be the fact that if anything *were* going to happen between her and these guys, it would have already. If they've been friends for a while then there's been plenty of opportunity for moves to be made - but she still chose to be with you. Take comfort in that and learn to trust your girl to do the right thing.

Answer 4

first of all, why are guys blowing up her phone when she has a man? sounds to me like she's giving them reasons to continuously call....& either she's not telling them she has a boyfriend or she's leading them 2 believe it's very okay to call her this much which makes you look like someone she's stringing along. if she's not having sex w/ any of them, then she's flirting her little tail off. been there done that. very disrespectful that she lets them call nonstop & she doesnt have regards for your feelings. where is the respect? make sure she's not using you.... & make sure the girl is even ready to be in a serious relationship period. you dont want to look like you're wrapped around her finger.....jmo. btw, she enjoys the attention from those guys. sorry.

Answer 5

You don't see the RED flag yet?

Answer 6

stop calling ''girls'' ''gurls'' you illiterate freak!