I have 8 weeks until my due date...im scared.....?

Question

I am 15 years old and i am pregnant. I have 8 weeks left until the end of my pregnacy adn im really scared. I have a great guy behind me and we both decided to give our baby girl up for adoption. I am having a preoblem with the with adoption ow and i dont know if i can go threw with it. He doesnt understand. we are still teenagers adn we cant raise a baby according to him. He is 17. I juss dont know if i can do this. Please Help

Answer 1

If YOUR family would be willing to help you and your baby out then I would keep her. If you still have 8 weeks and your already doubting it. Well imagine when you hold her, or even hear her cry for the first time. And even though he might be a good guy well guys that young usualy dont stick around even if they say they will. So if your family wont help and you want to keep her, talk to some orgizations that can help. Talk to some one at a large christian church. I just think you are going to regret giving her up latter. If you are already so full of doubt like this.

Answer 2

There are a lot of really good answers here from married people that have kids, single girls that raised kids and it worked, poeple who know someone that has done whatever, and like I said most of them are great answers and advice.

I am going to give you a little advice and hope that my specific experience will help you make the choice that you will feel the best about.

I am a birthmom. I placed my little girl for adoption 5 years ago. I read a ton of things on raising children and what you need. I loved my boyfriend (and we got engaged half way through the prego) but I knew the stats of getting married (and staying married) because of a baby were not great. I did lots of research and met with the couple that I had chosen. I recieved lots of pictures and letters form them after the placement and I have NEVER doubted the decision that I made. It was the single hardest thing that I have EVER done and it hurt. I cried for a long time. But I didn't cry because I wished that I had her back. I cried because I missed her. I knew that she was in the best place for her and that was what I wanted. She is living the best life ever now and i am married to an even better guy than her birthfather. She is in dance classes, gymnastics, voice classes, art classes, horseback riding classes, and gets to go to a private school with highly educated tachers ( I am a teacher now so I know how important that is). Most importantly she has a stable family (which includes a little brother that was also adopted now). She has that life that I wanted for her but could not have given her.

I don't want you to think that I am telling you to chose adoption because I know it is a personal choice. My biggest piece of advice is that you make the choice that you know is right. Do not let other people tell you what choice to make. You will have to live with the decision that you chose not me. Another thing that you need to make sure does not make the decision for you is fear. Whether is is fear of losing her or fear of raising her, fear is not a good choice maker.


The agency that I used has a website itsaboutlove.org Pleas check it out. there are profiles of adoptive parents and you can email them and talk to them about stuff. Also you can email me if you need to chat to someone who has been there!

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Answer 3

O hun, I am sorry that I dont have some great advise on what to do, all I can do is tell you about me. I was 16 when I had my first child, my boyfriend broke up with me for my best friend when I told him I was pregnant. My mom was mad and I was all alone. I decided to keep the baby who was a boy and I cant imagine life without him. I am 25 now and he is 8. I have a nice house and a nice car and a really nice life and 2 other kids and am married. Actully I am doing a lot better than a lot of the people that I went to school with that didnt have kids. I know that the thought of giving your child away is a hard one that nobody wants to do. But you have to think about what is in the best intrest of you and the baby. I had to work hard, I worked a 40 hour/week job all through high school and I wouldnt trade it for the world. I am sure what ever decision you make it will be the right one for you. I just want you to know that it is possible to keep the baby and still have a good life. Good luck :)

Answer 4

I'm sorry to hear about your predicament, but I truly feel that giving the baby up for adoption is the mature and right thing to do for you and the baby. You can't provide a baby what he or she needs at 15 and 17 emotionally or financially. I am married, with a house and a working husband and having my daughter was the hardest thing we ever did. I adore her to pieces and cannot imagine our lives without her, but we have no money for extras, and no time for friends, dates, or anything else. Our daughter consumes our lives, and that is how it should be. Being a parent means sacrificing the life of freedom that you had. That life ends completely and a new one begins. I think a 15 year old deserves to have more of the fun, free life--not be strapped down with a baby. I love being a mom, but there is no way I could have done it any younger than I did. I was 27 when I had my daughter. Be strong and have faith that you are doing the right thing. Then heal up and enjoy your youth--and have protected sex!

Answer 5

Perhaps he should have thought about your inability to raise a child before he got you pregnant. He's older, so according to the law he's actually MORE responsible than you are (although it did take two, didn't it?).

If you strongly feel that giving her up is no longer an option, then back out now while you still can. Otherwise you'll regret it for the rest of your life. If he decides not to stick around, he's a collossal loser and you didn't need him in the first place. Real men take care of the babies they help to create.

Answer 6

Have you interviewed adoptive parents yet? If not, and they find prospective parents for your baby and you give the baby up, you have a certain date to where you can have your baby back if you change your mind. They also have open adoption where you can always visit your baby at any time.
If you give birth in the hospital, you can ask about adoption and they will help you work through it.
If you both have supportive parents, they can help you raise the baby.

Answer 7

I have two friends that gave their babies up for adoption. One thinks it was the worst mistake she has ever made and one is okay with it. I think the best thing for your baby is to be with you. And that in a few years it will all be okay. But I do not know your situation. I just know that my love for my baby is so deep that even if I was left all alone I would do anything for him and never let him go. I don't want to confuse you but you asked my opinion. Good luck and whatever you decide you will keep on living and it will all be okay before you know it. Good luck!

Answer 8

You've got me crying. You are having to make the hardest
decision any woman has ever had to make and you're only
15 years old. Where are your parents? Or a sister/or anyone
in your family? Grandma will love that baby like crazy when
its born.

If your boyfriend will stick by you, so well and good, but he is
not able to support both of you probably. If he leaves, well
that's his choice.

Like one person suggested, go to a large Christian church
that can help you.

Look deep into your very soul. Don't do what anyone else
wants but what YOU want. You're a grown-up now and YOU
make the decisions for you-and your babay (I hope).

Answer 9

Hopefully you have already found your baby a great home. It will be very hard, but sounds like it's for the best. When you become a mother you have to put the baby's needs in front of your own. A baby needs a stable enviornment where the parents can afford to take care of them. If you cant do that, then adoption is the right answer.

Answer 10

Well if you have an open adoption, you can still see and be a part of the child's life.If you don't want to go through an open adoption, talk to a counselor after your baby is born.Good Luck