There are many kinds of discrimination, many more than racial. How would you handle some of these types?

Question

Consider working for many years and becoming ill and disabled and older with a lower income. What would you do if you were such a person? How would you feel if you became aware of blatant discrimination against you because you no longer look as healthy, young, wealthy? What might you say to a store employee who asks to see a receipt for your purchases before you are allowed to leave the store? What if someone stood beside you at a deli asking you if you need any help when you're just trying to decide which sandwich to buy? What if you were followed around a store while just shopping like you have in the past (and were not followed)? Remember you are still an honest, contributing, straight forward person with physical appearance differences. Please tell me exactly what you think, please.

Answer 1

"What might you say to a store employee who asks to see a receipt for your purchases before you are allowed to leave the store?"

That happens to everyone. My friends Chris and Dan meet the young, healthy, wealthy, good-looking stereotype you've been talking about and it happens to them all the time. Store employees USUALLY stop people based on how they act, not on demographic characteristics.

"What if someone stood beside you at a deli asking you if you need any help when you're just trying to decide which sandwich to buy?"

Once again, even my "socially desirable" friends have people do this to them.

It is a VERY unfortunate fact that as imperfect human beings, it is impossible for us to to always know if people are mistreating us because they are jerks or because they dislike our particular demographic. Sometimes it's both and sometimes it's just the first. And let me tell you, it sucks.

Answer 2

I think that most of the scenerios you posted happen to everyone. They're pretty much everyday stuff. Maybe some people just think they're being targeted b/c they're insecure about their apperance.
The biggest disrimenation I face is being from southern West Virginia and having a thick accent. People assume I am ignorant, married to my cousin and only wear clothes from the Salvation Army. When I talk, people from out of my area think it's just "so cute" and classify me as a dumb southerner.
I ignore them. It gets to me sometimes, but there's nothing I can do about it. People have things set in their minds that no one can disprove.
Happy '07!!!

Answer 3

If that were me I'd be wondering if there was something about the way I dressed and wore my hair.

The world is full of elderly (or elderly appearing) people who live on low incomes but who take care of their appearance and wear neat, clean, clothes that wouldn't appear to be "low-income-looking" clothing. (WalMart has reasonably priced clothing that doesn't necessarily announce its WalMart clothing - basic neat and clean shirt, basic neat and clean slacks, etc. They have little knit gloves for a dollar, shoes for less than $20, and handbags for less than $20 as well.)

If I were a man I wouldn't wear a tired old knit hat or a baseball cap of any kind. Again, WalMart has nice, new, inexpensive knit hats for guys. Buy a color that stands out and doesn't look dreary and downtrodden.

It is possible to dress and behave in a way that doesn't necessarily "yell" "low income". You can be a older and disabled but still dress and act in a way that shows you have self-respect and dignity. You should't let your situation define you. You need to define it.

I know all kinds of older people who have health problems, and none of them go through what you do. In spite of their health problems, they come across as well cared for, crisp, on-the-ball, people who happen to have some medical problem or gray hair.

Now - as for the people you mentioned.....

If someone offered to help you you must look like you need help. Not long ago I saw a man with an oxygen thing in the store. He was trying to sit up on one of the tables and looked like he was in distress. I asked if I could get him a chair or someone to help. If someone looks like they need help many people just feel they ought to ask. If you look needy or sick I think you need to understand and overlook this - or else do something to look less needy.

When it comes to the store person asking to see the receipt I think you should follow up on that by contacting the manager of the store and probably other people who deal in that type of discrimination. This is a case of "no matter what you look like people shouldn't be making judgments based on it."

People of your generation got word out that people ought to stop worrying about what others think and just wear whatever they felt like wearing. I'm not saying this is your problem, but its a possiblity. Well, people can wear old jeans and an old t-shirt and worn boots when they're young and they just look like young people who don't bother dressing well. If they do it when they're no longer young they can look like derelicts.

Just the other night Dick Clark was on for New Years Eve. He is older and slurs his speech because of his stroke, but there he was in his nice clothes, celebrating the evening, kissing his wife, and continuing to participate in the show that has been his for decades. He is obviously older and obviously has some difficulty, but he remains the same old person he's always been.

There will always be some discrimination of one sort of another. Sometimes it comes from good intentions. Sometimes it comes from ignorance. Some you just have to overlook. Still, I think you can reduce a substantial amount of it by seeing yourself as a "representative of older people with disabilities" and deciding to "show the world" up and coming, fresh, crisp, well put-together, and dignified an older, disabled, low-income person can look.

It should be possible for you to walk through a store and not look any different than anyone else (with, maybe the exception of whatever your disability is if it shows). That fact that you chose to mention "low income" led me to think you have allowed your income to show in your appearance, and it doesn't have to be that way.

A few nice, crisp, outfits that you can save for when you're out and a coat or jacket that looks nice and new can make a person fit in with "middle income" people.

Anyway, if I'm wrong in my assumptions you can obviously disregard this. I do suspect, though, that it isn't your disability or age that is getting you followed.

Answer 4

We all face this and it is not fair so why not contact EEOC There is a law to protect you.....