I have alot of things going for me. My ex just moved right on with her life like nothing happened. I realize the marriage is over but my heart still has a soft spot for someone who acts like I am not even alive. Physically I am very strong, I have other women who are interested in me. I just want to be as unfeeling as my ex. How does one reach that point?
2007-01-02 03:46:04 · 12 answers · asked by paco 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You get tired of being treated badly.
2007-01-02 03:48:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My goodness Paco is this Yahoo Answers or a dating service?
I give you a 9.5 on that dating advertisement. First, it makes you seem like a sentimental, sensitive guy with a great heart who loves children to boot. You mention that you are in good shape physically so the ladies know that you don't have a weight problem. You got the job thing down so no problems there. The other .5 I would have given you if you had integrated your love for pets as well. That would have sealed a perfect 10 rating.
Seriously though...
All in all, I would say you are moving on just fine. Forget about her. The next time you should be sentimental with her is (God willing) at your kids weddings 20 years from now. Then you can give her a hug and agree that you both did a great job with your children. Otherwise, she should be nonexistent as far as you are concerned.
This question should be a good chick magnet for you. Hopefully you get lots of responses. I hope you do.
2007-01-02 11:56:06 · answer #2 · answered by stymie1970 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It feels like sh*t when you reach the point of "unfeeling". I am not sure you want to go there. Forget about your ex, she's moved on and so should you. For physical needs, go out with other women who are interested in you, just be straight and sensitive with them so nobody get hurt. Also be mindful about protecting your kids. They should always come first. Eventually, when you get over your ex, I am sure you will find real love again!
2007-01-02 11:54:22 · answer #3 · answered by pathanChe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
being unfeeling isn't necessarily a GOOD thing. Fight to get to the point to accept the divorce. Since you mentioned your kids, they see what you do. If you get to the point of being unfeeling, you send a message - when people don't agree, they have no common ground. This is a bad message to send to kids. The world is made up of differences, and if they learn this behavior from BOTH parents, they accept that differences shouldn't be tolerated. this breeds hatred, bigotry and the like. Keep a caring heart for your ex without the desire to regroup the relationship and you'll do a favor to yourself and your kids...good luck!
2007-01-02 11:52:17 · answer #4 · answered by eleven 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly Chico, you don't. Reaching that point of being "unfeeling" is part of how she's made up, Dude. Yo, OYE, you're a good honest man, Bro. You're decent and have character just by your question alone. Trust me you don't want to be like her. It's a part of your history that you can never shake off no matter how hard you try or how much you lie to yourself and the ones that lie to themselves are scarred / damaged goods cause they dwell, hold grudges, and live forever unhappily cause there needs can never be met.
2007-01-02 16:52:37 · answer #5 · answered by HARDBALZ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to be unfeeling? Feeling is one of the things that makes us human.
You don't want to be cold and heartless, and you don't want to mourn forever. There's a sensible period to feel like crap. A year is long enough. You need to realise that wanting something from the past, something you can't have, is a ridiculous fantasy. It won't work. Wasting time longing for it means you're not giving your own future a fair chance. You deserve a fair chance.
2007-01-02 11:49:46 · answer #6 · answered by TimmyD 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you still have feelings means you are human and you shouldn't be disappointed about that. the best way to move on is to start allowing yourself to date other people. Don't compare them to your ex when you are with them. Instead, let them be themselves and accept them for who they are. You will eventually find someone who has traits that you adore and your heart will turn toward that person. Mostly, don't pressure yourself. What you are experiencing is normal and you will just have to give yourself the time your heart needs to work this out on it's own, but spending time with other women will be a good first step. This doesn't mean you have to hurry and find another wife, but you do need to start getting on with things.
2007-01-02 11:54:51 · answer #7 · answered by PDH 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Exercise is about the best. Plus join a load of men's groups on yahoo for emotional support.
I went through a hard time when my wife was hitting me but now I'm well into College and passing things like maths, sometimes, top of class. So we can move on. Yea, I put that strength down to what the guys in the men's groups give me. I really do.
2007-01-02 11:48:52 · answer #8 · answered by Put_ya_mitts_up 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont really want to be unfeeling! Your just sad because she has moved on. Give it some more time and I am sure you will be able to get over what used to be.
2007-01-02 11:50:56 · answer #9 · answered by nanny2jada 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just move on, You know she might still have feelings but dont want you to know because you two broke up for a reason and you may need to refocus on why you two broke up, Take that thought and then hopefully it will help you to move on without second thoughts.
2007-01-02 11:48:57 · answer #10 · answered by Ms. Q 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's probably not like that totally. She probably just acts like that when she's around you so that she seems stronger to you. If you two were once married then she still has feelings for you somewhere. Don't sweat it & just move on.
2007-01-02 11:48:37 · answer #11 · answered by leecarh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋