ive recently been dumped by the love of my life and feel i cant go on. i loved everything about him and thought were were going to be together for ever , i have never felt this way before. i am heartbroken . he has already got a new girlfriend and is positive were over i knew he didnt like me as much as i like him but i was so into him i ignored it now were overi feel dredfull i always think about him and cry about losing him im sure i wont find a love like this again what can i do to make myself happier and get over him he dumped me by text also and was crap to me should i sleep with his friend for revenge or try and win him back im so confused someone please help me
2007-01-02 03:00:55 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Learn to forgive -- This is not always easy, because human nature will want you to stay mad at someone, and to fuss and fume and focus on the negative issues at hand. But medical research has proven that once you learn to forgive someone, not only is the other person "OK" in your eyes, but a burden will be lifted from your head... and your heart.
Reach out and help someone else -- Although when your heart is broken, and you are feeling blue, the last thing in the world you want to think about is anyone else but yourself. Take a deep breath, and reach out and help someone else who is in need. Volunteer at a local soup kitchen, or drive an elderly neighbor to the doctor's office. By focusing on someone else's needs instead of your own, your heart will be stronger.
Laugh out loud -- It is true, laughter really is the best medicine. So when your heart is aching, find a few ways to tickle your funny bone. Rent that new comedy that just came out on DVD, or visit the library and find a few joke books. Start laughing, and you will be putting a smile on your face, and in your heart.
Change your routine -- Just for a day or two, mix things up. Stop doing the same old things in your daily schedule, and try something new. Have you been putting off visiting a museum or some other local attraction? Stop procrastinating, and make it happen. Spend an entire day doing things that make you happy.
Look forward to the future -- When life hands you a lemon (and a broken heart), dust yourself off, and get back up in the saddle again. Start looking forward to what the future holds for you. Set goals, and then make a plan to meet those goals. When you begin to focus on the future, you will soon forget the past, and anything that has caused you heartache and pain.
2007-01-02 03:09:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dear, DON'T sleep with someone else to "get even" or to try to get over him !!!!! it won't work !
(Gee whiz, he dumped you by TEXT ? what a coward. )
...you might be right about never finding a love exactly like that again...BUT as each person is unique, also each relationship is unique; I think there's a very good chance that you'll find a different love. You have a lot to offer; you have things to offer that no one else in this world has. There ARE people out there who will perceive that & appreciate it ! yes, there are. Several. Not just one "perfect" match hidden away somewhere; there are several men out there that would love you & be good to you. You may find one, you may find more than one -- just remember, marriage is for life, so only love one at a time ! :-) ...right now you hurt so much, the hurt is all you can be aware of. This is the time to take care of yourself. Do NOT make stupid, irreversible decisions at this time ! (like, don't sign a contract, or go way into debt in a buying spree) Sit down (preferably in a sunny spot) and make a list of the good things about you. Anything that would be admired by anyone. Now, build on it. Like, if you are 'pretty healthy', get a little healthier somehow. If your hair is nice, get some really good shampoo & make it even nicer; if your home is neat, add some color or beauty to it. And reward yourself. Right now he's not praising or thanking you for the good things you do, so you have to do it. I'm serious: talk to yourself ! (if it makes you laugh, so much the better!) Fix yourself at least one good (healthy) meal a day; eat it politely, then thank yourself for a delicious meal. Get enough sleep. You'll be okay.
2007-01-02 03:19:15 · answer #2 · answered by Yenta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
broken hearts never heal but in time it does get easier, why he didn't even have the courage to do it face to face with u. revenge will only make u look bad, can't get revenge on someone who could care less, u will just cheapen yourself. he already had this girl, while he was still with u, if u want to know the truth of the matter. sometimes we love others alot more than they do us, and we really do have a hard time going forward. don't allow someone to treat u like this, ever again. getting over it will take time, as there is nothing more painful than a betrayal done by someone we loved more than ourselves. but it was a one sided love, where u would be doing all the loving and him doing all the taking. don't think for a minute he will treat his new love any better than he has u. he is who he is, and u have to accept it, get out of the denial and see the facts here. it is painful, hurts our ego's, makes us feel bad about our self, and hurts our ego. we ask why wasn't i loved, well could it be because the one u loved is incapable of it, and will move from girl to girl, leaving a trail of broken hearts. u will one day see that u really did not loose a thing, as the years pass and u get a better life and he goes through one relationship after another. he did u a favor, only u just don't know it yet.
2007-01-02 03:21:49 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Appears he has moved on, and you are having a hard time. You arent the first to get your heart broken, and you wont be the last. I have found the best way to get over a broken heart is to move on. The healing process takes time, but get involved with friends and family and stay busy. As time goes on you will lose that broken heart, and you might find mr right. If he has moved on i would say trying to fight to get him back wont work. Keep your chin up high and keep your pride. Do not do anything for revenge. He has moved on and that would only make you look foolish. Be the better person and move on.
2007-01-02 03:12:22 · answer #4 · answered by hank 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a simialr situation, and trying to forget about him doesn't work, cuz you think you have and all of a sudden something happens to remind you of him and you break down.
Don't seek revenge, it just brings youdown to his level. Be the bigger person and try and get over it, try and think about the next person you'll meet that is going to treat you like gold, better than this guy ever did. I know that's the hardest thing to do and even now as I type it, my eyes tear up. But this guy broke up with you for a reason, he wasn't good enough for you. If he were the best for you, it wouldn't have happened. The only thing that is going to make your situation better is time and a positive attitude about yourself. Go buy yourself something nice or get a facial or a massage and do good for yourself.
Good luck, and if you ever need to talk...send me a message.
2007-01-02 03:27:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand it is pretty hard for you to deal with a situation like the one you are in right now. It just isn't easy making decisions without being emotional about them. Yet, I believe you did the right thing by sharing your feelings and seeking advise from friends and people on here about it.
I don't think seeking revenge is a good thing. It just leave a bad taste in you. And trying anything to winning him back isn't going to help either.
Respect yourself for who you are. From what you described about yourself, you seem to have a caring, loving personality. Just be yourself and trust and have confidence in you. He will realize how valuable you've been for him. If he doesn't realize, he's the unlucky one.
Sleeping with someone just to take revenge isn't going to help you at all. It only allows him or others to point their finger at you. And most importantly, you won't be able to live with something you aren't comfortable doing. You won't be able to look yourself in the mirror and feel proud about yourself. So, just don't do it.
Just be yourself. Begin to socialize with others around you. Do things you've always wanted to do in your life, to keep your mind occupied. Over time, you'll begin to let go these emotions and live a normal life. You may even find someone more deserving of your love and caring :-) Good luck.
2007-01-02 03:09:47 · answer #6 · answered by houstonian352000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only time fixes a broken heart. It will get easier to cope with, I promise.
2007-01-02 03:09:06 · answer #7 · answered by Brat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometime possivness turns into depression because of over confidence & over expectation reacts.It may not be true in your case but usually it happens.I think to win him back or take revenge is not the option either.The reason is revenge will not bring good fruits in your life nor by winning him back will not bring the same love that you were expecting.Besides understand that Life is about Change.You have to change yourself for a better life by associating with the people who can encourage you,uplift you and love,and accept you as God has made you.If you can let me know what city you live in,I may be able to get in touch with the people who can treat you as you are with repect no matter what background you come from.Besides you need to heal your wounds, not to sympathise but thru support & love.Remember you have to go along with your life that God has given you.One life, live it to the fullest.Believe in yourself and have faith in God, and you will find the best person in your life.Always remember "God has a plan".
Feel free to email me,should you have any questions to work together to get you better in life. ppandya_1@yahoo.com
2007-01-02 10:45:54 · answer #8 · answered by Prakash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. dont worry, you will get over him soon. No man is worth your tears and the only one who is will never make you cry. So this guy is not worth it. One day, you will find the right person who you will want to spend the rest of your life with. And if this ever happens again (you love him more than he loves you) chances are hes gonna leave eventually, so its best to end the relationship a.s.a.p. Revenge is a dont, trust me, it wont work... You will naturally make him jealous by finding that one person you were supposed to be with along. He is not worth trying to get back, he decide to leave, so thats his loss. You are obviously way to good for him. To find the right guy, try going to some place you enjoy going to, such as a rollerskating rink, the mall, a bowling ally, anything that floats you boat. The more you have in common with a guy, the better. Theres less to fight about, and more to talk about, so i wish you luck and i hope you find that one special person. i hope i helped!
-Dessi <3
2007-01-02 03:15:01 · answer #9 · answered by Susanna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they only thing that can never be fixed is a broken heart even if you try to put it back together you would still See the braking line !
2007-01-02 03:03:28 · answer #10 · answered by memo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋