Ok. I have a situation. I am a 29 year old man who was married for 6 years, has 2 kids that I share 50/50 custody with. My wife left me 1 year ago. She has made my life a living hell for the last year. She has taken me for everything she can. I have met a great girl a few months back and we currently live together and have just found out that she is pregnant (completely by accident). I was with my ex wife since we were kids, so her and my gf are the only 2 women in my life really. My question is, lately I've been thinking of going back to my ex wife. She has lied to me and actually left me for another guy (who she is living with). I have told my gf about all of this and she is trying to be as supportive as she can be through all of this. Should I go back to my ex wife? My gf asked me last night why I would go back to her because I never say anything nice about her and I really don't know. Why do I feel this way?
2007-01-02 02:46:05 · 22 answers · asked by Missy K 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Ok. I have a situation. I am a 29 year old man who was married for 6 years, has 2 kids that I share 50/50 custody with. My wife left me 1 year ago. She has made my life a living hell for the last year. She has taken me for everything she can. I have met a great girl a few months back and we currently live together and have just found out that she is pregnant (completely by accident). I was with my ex wife since we were kids, so her and my gf are the only 2 women in my life really. My question is, lately I've been thinking of going back to my ex wife. She has lied to me and actually left me for another guy (who she is living with). She has left me 4 other times in our relationship and I have taken her back. I have told my gf about all of this and she is trying to be as supportive as she can be through all of this. Should I go back ex? My gf asked me last night why I would go back to her because I never say anything nice about her and I really don't know. Why do I feel this way?
2007-01-02 04:39:59 · update #1
Excuse my details- I'm still trying to figure this out!
My ex has approached me about getting back together. Sometimes I think she is just messing with my head. She has left me 4 other times in our relationship and I have always taken her back. I am not ready to be a father again. I feel like I don't have enough time with the 2 that I have. I am very unsettled by all of this.
2007-01-02 05:04:45 · update #2
The reason you are feeling this way is because you knew her for so long and, as you said yourself, she and your current girlfriend are the only two girls you have been with. You have a long long history with your ex wife so you're bound to have feelings and wonder if you want to go back to her but that doesn't mean that she is right for you and that you won't get hurt again. Don't think of the good times which is what is probably holding you back. Think of why you are not together anymore.
2007-01-02 02:56:11 · answer #1 · answered by Soph 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have no idea why you feel that way. It sounds like you two don't get along. You both have decided to be with other people. That is not a marriage... that is a recipe for disaster.
If you feel this way, is it out of obligation to your children? Don't forget, you have another one on the way now. Or are you remembering the wife you married 6 years ago and longing for that again... because if so, is that woman you married so long ago still the same person? Are you still the same?
Listen, divorce is never good... but staying together when you don't like each other... staying together just for the kids... that's worse sometimes. The kids are under stress either way.
2007-01-02 02:53:10 · answer #2 · answered by CharmedTeri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I too have suffered a divorce and its not nice. Without knowing how you really feel I think that you are probably feeling like this because now your gf is pregnant everything is so final. Your going to be scared as your wife is the only woman you have previously had a relationship with so thats only natural. My advice is that you look at what you currently have a gf that has never done you wrong who is carrying your baby. You have a responsibility to her and the child and I think if you went back to your ex you would really regreat it doen the line. Give yourself and your new partner a chance for now. Good luck with everythig I hope you manage to find the best solution for everybody :)
2007-01-02 03:34:22 · answer #3 · answered by REBECCA C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't go back to your ex wife-you should take care of your pregnant gf!!! Don't let her alone now-you said it was an accident but this accident will be born in i don't know how many month and i know that this baby wants her daddy too not just the mom.Why do you want your ex wife back if she live with somebody else? There is no place for you anyway.Just go on with your life and tace care of your new family and don't forget your other 2 kids.
2007-01-02 02:51:18 · answer #4 · answered by hunnybunny3und2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife left you a year ago,and you already have another girlfriend,and pregnant. Not good for everyone. You can't start a new relationship until you've ended the old one. You didn't end the old one.there is a book,called "when a relationship ends". I found it very help full in helping me to understand why I felt as I did when I went through this same thing.
2007-01-02 02:56:10 · answer #5 · answered by sandyt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel this way because you did not give yourself enough time to get over the pain and hurt from your divorce.
You are facing the realization that your girlfriend is just a rebound, and now is a rebound with complications.
Tough situation, and all signs point to you having a hell of a rough time the next few years.
Good luck.
2007-01-02 02:50:01 · answer #6 · answered by Gem 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO don't do it. It's familiar to you and comfortable so you want it. We get set in our ways even if they are bad. It's hard to break habits. Fight the urge and make a clean break. It will also be less confusing for the kids. You know it won't last so getting back with her then leaving again will cause turmoil for the kids and you. Stick with the new girl and start a new better family there.
2007-01-02 02:50:41 · answer #7 · answered by bob K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your wife just don't get on. I can't say why you want to get back together but it looks a bit hopeless from here. The great girl you found is going to be unsettled by you looking back fondly at what you used to have. You are putting doubts in her head. Its time to put your full attention to your current life and future kid.
2007-01-02 02:53:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to go to counseling to figure out why you would even think about putting yourself into such a situation. You obviously feel bad about yourself or for whatever reason don't feel good enough about yourself to let yourself be happy wiith your new girlfriend. It's time to take stock of your life and realize that you've got it good now (you don't say anything bad about current gf) and embrace the life you now have.
2007-01-02 02:48:54 · answer #9 · answered by whatever 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be decisive! You have wasted 6 years and got a divorce! If you are unsure about your relationship with your current girlfriend, tell her. Don't use your ex-wife as an excuse. You are wasting time!
2007-01-02 02:59:21 · answer #10 · answered by jumbo_dumdum 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋