I have to have one,If I am pregnate ,because it would be my FOURTH child and I didn't want any more,I have a hard time with the three that I have,I will be 24 in a few days and am trying to loose weight and get in good shape,my husband and I are reunited as husband and wife again he is the father of my three,and if I am pregnate right now it wouldn't be his. PEOPLE,don't look so DOWN on me,after all he was with this other girl,and had a baby by her!,and was NOT with me,and I was with another man and I'm two days late and it would be by this other man,so what do you think I should do,my husband is even asking me if I've had my period yet?
I can't have this problem it would ruin our marrige and break our family apart!
2007-01-02 01:56:49 · 6 answers · asked by ~*meli$sa*~ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hold on now. Just take a deep breath. You do NOT have to abort your baby, nor should you. I'm going to be blunt here, but it is out of honest concern for both you and your child. Whether you wanted another child or not, you HAVE one. She is small right now, but she is still depending on you, her mommy, for love and protection. The circumstances of her conception and the circumstances of your life are NOT her fault. She is totally innocent in all of this and does not deserve to die. I think you know this, but are a little panicky right now. Trust me, you will not be able to live with yourself if you pay someone to hurt your child. She is just as much your baby as your born children, and I'm sure you would never let anyone hurt them.
I'm very glad to hear that you are back with your husband. If your husband fathered a baby with another woman, than he of all people should be able to accept what has happened. Yes, he will be upset. Yes, it was wrong of you to sleep with that guy, and wrong of your husband to sleep with another woman. But you won't make any of that right by killing an innocent little person. Who knows? This may end up making your marriage stronger in the long run. Regardless, however, you owe it to your baby to protect her no matter what. Be honest with your husband and give him a chance to prove what kind of a man he really is. Give him some time and space if he needs it.
If you need help being strong, PLEASE take a look at this information, before you do something you regret:
Photos and Video of Abortions, Including 1st Trimester Abortions:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html
Information on All Aspects of Abortion:
http://Abort73.com
Photos and Facts About Prenatal Development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm
Abortion Stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-G-2-testimony.html
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/girlswhoaborted.cfm
Abortion Risks:
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.teenbreaks.com/abortion/complicationsgirls.cfm
Abortion Deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm
You can get a free pregnancy test, free counseling (with or without your husband), and all kinds of free help at a pregnancy care center. Believe me, you are not the first woman in this situation, and they can help. You can find one near you by calling 1-800-395-HELP or visiting:
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp
You can do the right thing.
2007-01-02 11:12:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
While_love_remains is absolutely right. Your marriage and family life are already messed up - the new baby is just the evidence that will force you to take positive action
I think you are beginning to realize you really aren't against abortion after all, but you can examine your feelings on that later on, in calmer times. No matter what, your husband will know about it because after an abortion you'll have to explain why you are bleeding for 6 weeks. Plus it sounds like you don't even know for sure if you're pregnant. Having a messed up life can interfere with your cycle.
Who knows, this pregnancy could be the thing that finally gets your life in order. Why is it a problem, if he cheated and has an outside baby in the first place? In your mind, was he the "bad" one and you the "good" one? Life just doesn't work that way. If you can accept yourself as partly "bad" now, maybe you can allow yourself to aceept him as partly "good".
Have the baby, get rid of both of those men and start a new, un-complicated life with your children.
.
2007-01-02 02:32:03 · answer #2 · answered by Kacky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that is a loaded question! Okay, if you do not believe in abortion and you have one, this will haunt you forever. There are other options and you need to look into them. What about the poor guy and his rights? Please don't take those away from him. If your husband has also had a child with another woman then he will just have to cope. If he is not willing to do so then he is a very one-sided person and a relationship will never work.
2007-01-02 02:40:52 · answer #3 · answered by stacey h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Calm down
That's huge
Certainly your marriage has some strengths or you would not have had 3 kids already or survived together this long
An abortion is not reversible, so its a 'nuclear' option
it could ruin you and your marriage as much as this kid could!
certainly you have some justifiable anger, which is just as dangerous as anger, and you know 2 wrongs. . .ya da ya da
Is it at all possible - just possible- you husband is the father?
Have you and your husband discussed what would happen if you were pregnant again? would he also want an abortion? would he want to give up this baby to adoption? keep this baby?
You are not the first family to have this problem
I am not one fro keep ing secrets but you may need to keep this a secret from him, can you do this?
2007-01-02 02:39:55 · answer #4 · answered by mike c 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really don't want to abort, put the baby up for adoption. On the other hand, if you don't want your husband to know, it's probably best to abort. And next time, use some damn birth control!
2007-01-02 06:56:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, why would it ruin your marriage? He was with another woman and got her pregnant, would he not understand if you told him you were with someone else too?
2007-01-02 02:31:11 · answer #6 · answered by while_love_remains 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋