Who is in the wrong, me or him?
I didn't tell him I was going to spend New Years eve with him but I think he just presumed it.
2007-01-02 01:05:07 · 37 answers · asked by abluebobcat 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Let me tell you a story! 2 years ago I used to get along quite well with some guy in my class. He is a nice boy (tall, brown hair, deep green eyes) and a good friend. Back then he didn't have a girlfriend and he used to hang out more with his buddies (me included): in clubs, discos, bars...any place that served beer and nice chicks. He used to say that no girl/woman will ever make him forget his friends. And indeed no girl managed to do this!.....until last winter when he met HER: a very smart girl, also quite pretty who also studies in our college. This November they celebrated their first year together and I have to say that I never saw him as happy as he is now and I am very happy for him. Yet his pals don't think the same way as I do. Once this girl appeared they were no longer in the center of his attention: he stopped seeing them, coffee took place of the beer and the two are practically unseparable. His old pals don't miss any chance to point this incredible change and show their dissaproval, or maybe even laugh on his expense. Anything familiar here? I guess your friend is just feeling neglected and afraid to loose you and thus his strange behaviour and reproaches. As for your question, well....I don't know who is more wrong! I actually asked my self this question and I couldn't find the right answer...Maybe u can help me: who is wrong in my story? My friend, for forgetting about his original principles and about those who were his true pals for such a long time OR his buddies, who couldn't accept the fact that he moved on and be happy for him?.......
Answer this and you'll sure have your answer!...
2007-01-02 01:45:38 · answer #1 · answered by Ciumpirik 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well of course it is our friend who is in the wrong, because he had assumed too much about what you wanted to do and was selfish in his thinking and wants. The best thing to do is to either let him work out that he was wrong, or just ignore him for a while, then maybe he will take the hint! After all he should be capable of realising that someone who has a girlfriend would want to spend new years with that girlfriend instead of any other friends, after all its a specialy time of year and one that should be made special, whereas drinking can happen on any night of the year!
Hopefully your friend will work out he was wrong to be mad at you and apologise, if not then maybe it could be said he isnt so good a friend as you thought he was!
2007-01-02 01:27:50 · answer #2 · answered by wiccanfairiekitty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Theres no winning in situations like these.
If you don't spend it with your partner then they get annoyed and think you don't appreciate them
If you don't spend it with your mate then they get annoyed too.
And even if you were to see them both on new years eve then they would've both wanted your attention and would get annoyed if you hadn't spent enough time with them
So you're kinda screwed, but no i don't think your wrong, personally. Maybe it was wrong that you didn't notify him, and if i was to be honest, its no good "thinking he presumed" because he might not've, which may be the case for this situation, unless he was purposely being difficult.
In the end of the day, if he values the friendship, he'll get over it in no time.
New years eve is a special time so you wanted to spend it with your special girl, i see no problem with that.
2007-01-02 01:24:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend needs to grow up a bit. You have a girlfriend now and he is just jealous of the time you spend with her. He will get over it. You did the right thing for New Years Eve.....now maybe plan something to do with just him and he will feel better.
2007-01-02 01:30:24 · answer #4 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you did not promise him before hand to spend New Year's eve with him, then he is wrong for getting angry that you spent the eve with your girlfriend. Your friend should get a life of his own.
2007-01-02 01:10:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you did anything wrong. I would say you made the best choice. A guy should be with his girl on this special night. I suppose your friend is single and doesn't have a girlfriend, because if he did, I'm sure he would want to spend time with her. Don't worry, you made the right person happy.Your friend will, in time, get over this.
2007-01-02 01:09:36 · answer #6 · answered by june clever 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is wrong.
People often go through this after spending time with friends for whatever period of time. When those within the group of friends start meeting people of the opposite sex and going their own way, those remaining basically get jealous because they're feeling isolated and alone.
If the situation was reversed and he spent New Years with a girlfriend, he'd understand it. Until then, he has to learn to understand your values.
2007-01-02 01:11:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you did not lead him to believe you were going to go out with him then you did nothing wrong. That said do you spend every New Year's Eve together or anything that would make him expect to see you? If not, let him know you are sorry he was disappointed but that you weren't aware he was expecting you to go out with him. It's not worth loosing a friend over.
2007-01-02 01:09:55 · answer #8 · answered by blhenne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is in the wrong but I can understand why he is upset. Its hard when you're single and all of your friends have significant others. Maybe you should talk to him about it....however I know that guys are different from girls and I'm giving you a girls perspective. But if I were him I would have talked to you about it before new years even happened....but a lot guys don't like to make plans so it's not so I can understand what that happened.
2007-01-02 01:12:17 · answer #9 · answered by pianogirlrach 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did nothing wrong, If you have a girlfriend things do change and he will learn to accept it. Just make sure you let him know that you will always be a friend but the girl is someone in your life you need to consider now.
2007-01-02 01:09:47 · answer #10 · answered by Virginia C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋