i Don't want offensive answers and I do not hate Bi people or gays at all, But I am hell of uncomftorable around them, I have my morals and thoughts of it and I just think its wrong...I accuse my best friends if they are bi or gay...Like on myspace and If i find out they are I delete them...I try accepting them but the insecurities still there..I don't want therapy or pills..I just need some help dealing with this insecurity..
2007-01-01 21:31:38 · 14 answers · asked by kurt cobains gun 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Homosexuality is NOT a contagious disease.
They are the way God made them, and God made them that way for a reason.
I sure hope you are noy homophobic.
I wish you peace.
2007-01-01 21:32:58 · answer #1 · answered by Rev. Two Bears 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I hate to be the bearer of bad news here, but therapy is the ONLY help you are going to get that will actually work.
You need therapy in dealing with your insecurities, working out why you feel the way you do, understanding the roots of your insecurities and facing the fears of the unknown that make you so insecure.
You've already admitted that you "have [your] morals," which says you probably have an extreme religious background in which your religious beliefs don't allow for acceptence of homosexuals or homosexuality.
You have come here, knowing that you're behavior is unacceptable in modern society and you know there is a problem with it.
You've taken a half step towards recovery, now you must complete that step and ask for actual help from someone qualified to give it to you.
You need therapy.
It's not an admission of weakness, but simply an admission of not posessing the ability to get over your insecurities without guidence. That takes a big person to admit that and an even bigger one to accept help when help is readily available.
2007-01-02 05:38:23 · answer #2 · answered by DEATH 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
We are human beings with feelings, just the same as you are.
I was the same as you are now (I am NOT saying this will happen to you)...When I was 15, all my friends were gay, and I was fine with them until their respective partners turned up, then I was out of there!!
When I was 16, I found out my 20 year old brother was gay...When I was 21, I thought I was gay but ignored it...
When I was 25, I came out as bisexual, but still felt uncomfortable...by the time I turned 26, I came out as a lesbian...I still have insecurities about being gay myself...it's normal..
BUT, in all honesty, perhaps it is more about a lack of understanding than an insecurity? Your friends probably like you for the person you are, NOT because they find you attractive...
What is wrong for you, may not be wrong for someone else, so talk to your friends and explain to them you feel uncomfortable and they will understand, and in turn, you may become more understanding...
Don't hide from things, investigate them to understand them...To ignore them is to feed the insecurity...
2007-01-02 07:39:30 · answer #3 · answered by Spunky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone makes choices and have to deal with those choices themselves. A real true friend wouldn't disassociate themselves with someone for those reasons. I think that people should be able to feel or believe as they choose, but they don't have to include me so don't cross my lines and there's not a problem. Oh yeah, just like everything else how is it know if a gay/bi wants you anyway? And if so once you've stated your feelings, regarding that, that should be the end of the story... if not then don't interact with them anymore. Good luck!
2007-01-02 05:37:36 · answer #4 · answered by fatboy_b2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, you have issues about the morality of being gay or lesbian. Why is this so? Is this a religious belief? how do your feel about abortion? do you disassociate yourself with people who have had abortions? how about Divorce? Do you stop disassociate yourself from divorcees? If you don't hang around with people you might as well hate them as you aren't even being civil to them. What these people do behind closed doors with other consenting adults is no one's business. If they are friends, then respect that they are different. They aren't trying to have sex with you. Do you have friends who are straight but of the opposite sex? Are you trying to have sex with them?! If yes, then the issue is yours and yours alone. If no, then you understand how a gay person can just be your friend and not want to be with you in that way. If you have friends who smoke, so long as they do not smoke around you, then let them be. By the same token if you did smoke, would you want your nonsmoking friends to dictate your life? This country is built upon respect for each other, that way we can be respected back. its a 2 way street. Why are you thinking about what these people do? Just look at them as people. They hold jobs, they pay bills, they own homes, the drive cars..they are people. Do you feel insecure about people who have anal sex?!? How do you know if they do or don't? How rude is it to ask them such a personal question?!? Don't worry about it.
2007-01-02 06:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by Neptune 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people will just always be insecure with these things i was perfectly fine with gays bi's etc until two lesbians held me down and tried to rape me now i get so nervous around bis or lesbians but i think it really has nothing to do with the sex of the person cause if someone was to be raped or something by a male all men would make them uncomfortable. You maybe always uncomfortable forever as long as your not discriminating anyone you'll be fine deary.
2007-01-02 05:35:43 · answer #6 · answered by catieann 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well you never said how old you are but as you mature you may bee more accepting of them. Maybe you're afraid what other people might think if you have gay friends. Just remember it's you that has the insecurity about them. They don't care if you don't like them or not. If I hated people of color that would be my problem not theirs.
2007-01-02 05:40:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A gay person is just like any other human being.
I do somehow understand your feeling "uncomfortable", that is not your fault, but the society's.
One way to overcome your socially-programmed neurosis around gays is to gradually expose yourself to books and music made by or for gays, to meet other gays informally, and to familiarize yourself with the values and concerns of gay families.
You can find news about gay people to read at 365 gay.com and at Yahoo Gay & Lesbian News. There you will see that gay people have lives, hopes and problems just like you.
Good luck, and thanks for being honest and clear about how you feel.
2007-01-02 07:48:26 · answer #8 · answered by Kedar 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well try joining a gay community and fill out the bio saying about yourself but don't gay bash. Then chat with people about your issues. A good site that just started is http://www.mygaymyspace.com . It welcomes everyone but is geered towards gays and lesbians .. Try it out see if it helps.
2007-01-02 19:31:12 · answer #9 · answered by playfullgirlz 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just remember that their human beings to, and also remember just because their gay or bi DO NOT automatically assume they think of you sexually...thats one of the problems with straights, they think anyone who is gay or bi is automatically attracted to them. But yeah, just treat them the way you would treat anyone else.
2007-01-02 05:38:43 · answer #10 · answered by BlondBoy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋