I am 24 and boyfriend was 31. He broke up with me because I wanted a life with him. This happened two days ago. On NYE I tried to call him and text him, and told him I did not need to married I just needed him. I got a text that said Happy ny and I will always love you. Thinking that maybe there was still hope I went to talk to him. and he said it is over go home. This is coming from a guy who tells me daily more than once that he loves me. He brought me a christmas at work, when I told him thank you no one has ever done that he replied with no one else ever will either, implying only he will. He bought me a laptop for christmas, What kind of guy would do this.
2007-01-01 14:35:55 · 18 answers · asked by Lindsey Lou 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A guy afraid of commitment? A confused guy? A guy that's not telling you everything and is hiding something?
I'm sorry you're hurting right now, but maybe you should step back and take a breather from the relationship. It sounds like that's what he wants to do, either permanently or temporarily. I think pushing the issue with him right now would only make things worse.
Best wishes.
2007-01-01 14:41:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There must have been something to have changed his mind about you and your relationship together. Did he get mixed feelings about your gratitude for the gifts he gave you? Could he have felt unappreciated? Think back and try to recall what you talked about and what happened in the last few days. If nothing seems to have gone amidst that you can recall, and he will not talk to you about anything, that give him his space. Sometimes all a person needs is his space to think about what is bugging him and to reflect on the relatioship. He could be scared about his feelings for you, (amazing many people at the beginning of a relationship are very scared ) . He might be afraid he will not be able to handle a long-term relationship, a fast-and-true committment, or the speed that the relationship is taking. Whatever it is, he might not even understand it himself. He might not know how to put what his happening in his heart and mind into words, and if he is not willing to communicate with you what is happening to him just yet, you will only make it worst if you keeping insisting that he must talk to you or you keep going to his home.
You need to step back and give him his space to figure it out for himself. Just have patience and wait. When he is ready, he will want to explain what has happened to him. If he comes back to you, you will know that you two are meant to be together, if he does not, then he was never meant for you... You will then need to move on and meet someone that is willing to and wanting to be with you.. Good Luck
2007-01-01 23:00:54 · answer #2 · answered by Mari-Mari 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A NO GOOD FOR NOTHING LOSER! Thats what kind of guy he is.He dosent want commitment and is afraid of it! He see's you love him so he wants to do things that'll make you FEEL like nobody will ever be as great as him.THATS SUCH BULLSH*T! Someone will commit to you and give you something more expensive...even if it isnt expensive..its the thought that counts...What you need from a man is love, honesty,loyalty and respect.Those are all the things this creep isnt giving you! Drop him before he makes a habit out of trying to make you always follow him.You dont need him, he needs you.If he cant make a commitment(or he's scared) he just isnt ready.Maybe he has someone else on the side.If he dosent or does A GUY WHO PLAYS WITH YOUR EMOTIONS ISNT WORTH CRYING OVER! Theirs better ones out there, go get yourself one girl! Happy New Years..Out with Old ...In with the New! :)
2007-01-01 22:58:54 · answer #3 · answered by ♥ Loving My Babyboy ;) ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has asked not to discuss the subject before, and you keep bringing it up, then I would say a man who knows when it is time to move on. If this was the 1st time you brought it up, and this was the result then I would look at Christmas, he was hoping for something more, not as in a gift that can be bought, but something from you. And again, he is cutting his losses. I have a feeling that you may know what this is, but are looking for something else to pin it on.
2007-01-01 22:51:41 · answer #4 · answered by brp_13 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a guy who is a coward!
It sounds to me like he got a case of cold feet.
could be that he is still enjoying being single
sorry that this happened to you.
give him a few days, he will come to his senses.
In the meantime, try really hard NOT to call him or email or text him.
the second he thinks that you are over him he will be back at your job begging you back...
if he does not, he really did you a favor.
He got you a LAPTOP (most dont get that)
and he was honest enough to tell you that he does not want a life with you (yet).
Why compromise if you want these things.
It is hard but at 24, there are armies of men that would love to have you.
It is NOT over by a long shot, you just have to play it cool and let hiim admit to the mistake. YOU did not thing wrong here. In a relationship, you should feel comfortable enough to express yourself without the other person dumping you if they dont agree with your opinion. Sounds like he is 24 and YOU are 31
2007-01-01 22:42:34 · answer #5 · answered by kissmymiddlefinger 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't know what he meant by saying no one would ever do anything like that for you unless he was saying that he loved you so much that no one could do more than he would for you. If he told you he loved you all the time, he must, but then he is not ready to make a commitment for you two to make a life together. Be glad that he is honest with you. If you two really love each other, you will have a life together when the time is right.
2007-01-01 22:41:20 · answer #6 · answered by Dyan 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If guy that can buy you a laptop for Christmas is a man who loves you. He must really love you and want to marry you. I guess it kinda hurt him when you told him that you didnt need to get married. He may have taken it the wrong way. Talk to him and see what he says. If he truly loves you, then he will talk to you and things will work out for the good.
2007-01-01 22:43:56 · answer #7 · answered by young grown man 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
he doesn't want to marry, and he is most likely seeing someone else, these guys don't waste too much time when they don't like something u do or say. don't beg him or go to him again as it will just hurt u more, distance yourself from him, if it is meant to be it will be. when someone tells u it is over without even a gleam of hope they are serious and really have no intention of going back with u. everything happens for a reason, and we don't always know why things are, but we just have to accept it, and move on.
2007-01-01 22:47:00 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is possibly afraid of commitment. He wants to be the one who showers you all the love & affection, BUT he wants to keep you at bay.
Give him some time & space. He might just need to think things through & then who knows?
Wait for him to contact you, don't call or text him no matter how strong the urge gets to do so.
2007-01-01 22:44:20 · answer #9 · answered by funkychick 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he has some serious committment issues, or maybe he's just plain ole playing games with you.
Someone in their 30's should be past this stage, give him some space and see what happens from there. The space might be good for you too.
2007-01-01 22:38:21 · answer #10 · answered by Blue Eyes 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋