My husband is on the computer 3-4 hours at a time, and usually about 10-11 a day. When he gets up in the morning before he has even made a coffee, he has switched it on, and it doesnt usually get switched off till he goes to bed. The days that he works he comes home and turns it straight on. I feel really alone, I am 6 months pregnant and we live a long way from my family and friends, so I really only have him. The problem is that I dont have him, the computer does, he puts on his headphones so i cant even talk to him, and has started eating his meals at the computer too. I try to talk to him about it and he just tells me that i am whinging, and complaining about nothing, and wont even listen. Can anyone give me any ideas on how to get my husband back?
2007-01-01 10:53:42 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Peace, world of warcraft is the problem! that is what he spends all day doing, and when i tried to play it with him he would yell at me for not playing properly
2007-01-01 11:01:15 · update #1
Sure thing honey...tell him that you are missing his company and want to come up with a compromise. Tell him that you know he enjoys his computer time. That you enjoy and crave his company as well. Then suggest that everyday at a certain time is your time..say 7-9 or whatever. If he knows that you understand and do not want him to stop with the computer he will be more open (at least he should be!!) to your suggestion. Then try and get out of the house!! Even a simple walk will do!! Good luck!
2007-01-01 10:57:55 · answer #1 · answered by mysweetluvie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I would ask your husband if he has at least 20 minutes to talk about this problem that he's created. I would let him know that with his spending too much time on the computer, it is making you feel like you are being left out of his life. It shows that he doesn't enjoy your company, so that's why he is on the computer all the time. Let him know how it is affecting you.
Is he into the chat rooms or is he getting email that you don't know about? What exactly is he doing that he spends so much time on the computer....you were not specific on what he does.
If he is getting upset whenever you ask him or talk to him about the problem, could it be that he is hiding something from you? I would ask him that, but be polite about it.
If he is not willing to sit down with you to talk about this, then you know that he doesn't care about your feelings and that he is more communicative on the computer than with you. Because if he does see that this is a problem, but doesn't do anything about it, there is your answer, he doesn't care.
2007-01-01 12:42:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing I can tell you is to try and catch him when hes taking a break, Like when he gets up to pee. And really let him know how much this is hurting you and that your not telling him to give up his hobby but to make some time for you. Make one night out of the week date night even if it means ordering food in and watching a movie. tell him you work hard makeing meals and would apperaciate you sitting down with you. Marriage is about giving and taking. Find a hobby for yourself so when he is doing his thing you have somthing. This is really important since you have a child on the way cause your going to need his help and he needs to understand that to that its both your child! I hope he is mature enough to relize all this and take his responsibiltys like a man. Good luck and rember be strong and don't let him brush you off
2007-01-01 11:40:25 · answer #3 · answered by Jessica A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get on the computer with him. Do you have two of them? Could you start playing a game such as World of Warcraft together as a couple? "When in Rome..." You'd be surprised how much you can re-connect if you plug-in with him.
There's also the possibility that he's avoiding things in your relationship by sitting on the computer. It sounds like you really need to communicate. Sometimes computers can really swallow up your time unintentionally- is he aware of how much time he spends on the computer vs. with you?
2007-01-01 10:57:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yikes, I better get off the computer. Write him note, or better yet send him an email. Tell him how you feel. Tell him your plan to find your happiness. I am assuming it wouldn't be what you are doing now. It probably would include leaving him. That should wake him up. Then keep the dialog going. Good luck. Gotta go!
2007-01-01 11:00:00 · answer #5 · answered by Bullwinkle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. my husband is adicted to video games and spends all day everyday on it. he also eats in front of the tv. i rarely get anytime with him . i really have no advice on this bc im struggling with the same thing. try spicing things up around the house or wake up before he does one day and hide the power cord and you to do something together and let him have the cord after you get back. good luck and happy new year
2007-01-01 11:10:02 · answer #6 · answered by punkins_wife121705 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is either addicted to games or he is addicted to pornography. Either one, you need to discuss. Good luck!
2007-01-01 10:58:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋