My husband seldom shows eye contact to me. He says that is just the way he is but I find it annoying. It has got worse over time. It saddens me that he does not seem to care when I tell him that I feel rejected and shut out when he does this and other stuff like walking in front of me and contradicting me. I came from an abusive family but I know now that I deserve better than this and it not up to me to beg respect any more. I used just get told by people to hang in and keep loving which I believe is crap at this stage. What do others think? It is strange but the old false guilt creeps in still when I acklowledge this is not my fault.
2007-01-01 09:53:39 · 11 answers · asked by kirrii 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is an emotionally neglectful husband; which is another form of abuse. Controlling people rarely, if at all, show eye contact. I have no idea why would anyone tell you to "hang in and keep loving". Doesn't make any sense to me. How in the world you can ever have even something as basic as a decent love-making without an eye contact. He is emotionally neglectful and it is an abuse. Of course, you should get out of there ASAP.
2007-01-01 10:06:25 · answer #1 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes not having good eye contact could be a source of shame, or low self esteem. Eye contact is intimidating. Instead of focusing on him focus on yourself and ask these questions. Do i nag him which is the number one destroyer of intimacy?
Have you ever contradicted yourself?, which by the way i have never met a women who doesn't. Based on changing feelings?
If you are not having sex or being nice to each other maybe he is just hangin in there for the kids if there are any.
2007-01-01 10:03:24 · answer #2 · answered by smurf 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eye contact represents connection and respect. You are right. He may be EXTREMELY uncomfortable being close to you. If you came from an abusive family then your choice of a life partner is probably not the healthiest. You cannot do ANYTHING to change another person. All you can do is change yourself. Get counseling to sort it out or get books and heal your inner demons.
2007-01-01 09:59:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you ought to replace into ignorant of ways long to work together in eye touch, in any different case the breaking of such or the staring for a pre-set quantity of time looks contrived. enable it come certainly. I, too, have been extensive unsleeping of that when I confer with human beings. the place as as quickly as upon a time i does no longer seem at human beings interior the attention. considering the fact that i did no longer desire human beings to think of I had a shattered shallowness or became a psycho, I made a large unsleeping determination to enable it replace into organic. it relatively is a technique, like various factors in learning the artwork of verbal replace, in spite of the undeniable fact that it is finished in a manner that's no longer in basic terms large yet useful reinforcement, assuring the listener/talker which you're in contact interior the discourse.
2016-11-25 20:54:03 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately we seek out mates that we were raised or groomed as a child or our informative years to think is acceptable mate material.
You sound like a very intelligent woman. Either ask that he get joint counseling or consider your options for ending the marriage.
I've got a yes or no answer for you and this will help you with your decision. Can you see yourself with this man 20 years from now?
Remember........it's yes or no.
2007-01-01 09:58:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for divorce and get on with your life. There are very nice men out there who are loyal and respectful to women so why put up with your husband when you don't have to. If you stay with him it is only because you have low self esteem and a self worth. Good Luck to you!
2007-01-01 10:40:13 · answer #6 · answered by Maggie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like something is wrong and getting worse..
Maybe it is time to start planning for your divorce.
2007-01-01 10:21:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband wont talk to me or look at me when i want to talk about our relationship. so i just stop talking to him.
the next best thing is get out and be on your own. he wont change and he doesnt want to. so since he wont you will have to make that choice. and yes, you dont deserve this treatment.
2007-01-01 10:00:31 · answer #8 · answered by cats3inhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry your going thru this,and your past.Good luck to you when all else fails Pray.
2007-01-01 10:05:18 · answer #9 · answered by bamaguy712000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get out of the marriage (dont talk about it do it)
2007-01-01 10:07:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋