What are some coping skills after leaving a three-year abusive relationship?

Answer 1

Take some serious time to yourself to clear your thoughts and heal and to reflect on the lessons you've learned because of that relationship. Don't date for a while (at least several months). Instead, think about what YOU think are neccessary qualities in a good relationship and what YOU think are absolutely unallowable in a good relationship. For example, trust and honesty are necessary, abuse, lying, and cheating are unallowable. Be specific with your list. This is for YOU. Respect yourself enough to not settle for less from yourself or from anyone else. You can't change another person, as I'm sure you've learned, but you can change yourself and you can make better choices for yourself in the future. You don't have to have BS in your life, so make this a time for your own renewal. Good luck!

Answer 2

Go back over the relationship in your mind to see why you were attracted to him in the first place. Work on building up your self esteem and make a list of what you want in a relationship and then look for that in the next person you get into a relationship with. you can also contact a local abuse shelter and see what counseling, if any, they may have to help you so that you don't put yourself into another similar situation.

Answer 3

If you spent more than 10 minutes in an abusive relationship then chances are you wouldnt follow anyones advice. I used to love to help girls like you get over these things, but history teaches us that you like the abuse. THREE YEARS? Get right out of town. Does this seem kinda mean to you? Its not meant to be, I just dont understand how.........awwww nevermind.

Answer 4

Maybe therapy. You need to figure out why you stayed, why you chose him. It's not your fault he was an ahole but there is a reason we make the choices we do. You need to learn what the reason is and change it. If not your stuck making the same bad choice over and over.