Is this possible?The end?What did I do wrong?

Question

I asked a close female friend that we need to lose contact for awhile-so that I can get over my feelings for her.She said “If thats how you feel sweetheart,ok and that maybe you do need time out”.She only wants to be friends.The conversation ended with an argument, with her calling me 2 faced and selfish.(asked her if she ever felt anything for me and for her to be truthful).Why would she call me this? We're close friends.

We've not spoken for a whole month.I have tried calling\txting(last 2 days) and have got no response from her.For christmas I sent a card saying how important the friendship is to me and how special she is.In the txt I wrote how stupid I behaved and I regret it,would do anything to make amends. Why hasn't she responded to the missed calls\txts???Also the xmas card?

Could I have offended\hurt her really that much-how could I if she agreed to no contact?

Does this mean the friendship was never genuine?Will we speak again--or is she clearing her head?

Why is she ignoring me?

How long is the 'staying apart' last?I really want to get in touch.She wanted to remain friends-so I am respecting her wishes,no?I have delt with my feelings-so I'm ready to get back in contact

She said that we're only friends---could she have possibly fancied me and not told me?

Answer 1

the longer she blanks contact, that's how much she liked u.
think u've hurt her feelings, a bit.
give her time 2 calm down, she'll b back.
save it all 4 then and give it 2 her a dressing down about how u were worried about her, with both barrels!
say ur a fool and try 2 learn however much u think u've hurt her, she's hurting u more!
give it 1 more go, text/call, then wait a suitable period of time, by then u'll just have 2 face it.
she'll get in touch, eventually.
good luck sticking with waiting 4 her.
patience, dude.
:)

Answer 2

OMG... painful... really painful. the size of the text you wrote and the way you expressed yourself say more than you did. :)
Here's how it goes:

If she is a skeptical kind of person, she might think that you became her friend because you wanted to know many things about her. The truth is, it can be dangerous for a girl/woman to be with a guy who knows her weaknesses, unless he is well intentioned. :) and it's hard for most of us to tell what the intentions of a person really are.

On the other hand, I truly believe that she wanted to be just friends, because, as far as I can figure, you've made some efforts to build this friendship. If she had felt the same way about you, she would have reacted differently.

Think of the general meaning that the word "friend" has in our minds. It is a person we can rely on, a person we trust, a person who has no interests whatsoever. NOT a person who likes us and hopes to become more than friends someday. And she wanted a FRIEND....

She also knows that still being friends with you would be frustrating for you. Imagine you would suffer every time you knew she is dating a guy. A normal friend wouldn't. Besides, she wants to be friends with people who want to be just her friend, but you want something else, no matter how hard you try to adapt to the situation. :)

I know, you need to be near her and if friendship is the only way then friends you must be, but when you told her about your feelings, you took a risk. :) She feels betrayed because you had other intentions than you made her think you had.

There's no point in insisting. You'll have feelings for other women (hopefully, you'll be less obsessive) and I see you have great tastes (her reaction shows that she is not evil and doesn't want to hurt you) so you'll have better luck in the future. :)

Good luck... and don't be sad... it's going to be hard in the beginning, but you will draw this conclusion yourself: it's the best thing that could have happened... :)

Answer 3

I think she maybe liked having the male attention-ie you having feelings for her and then when you stood up to her by saying you wanted some breathing space she didn't like that. To some people attention is a drug, some girls really get off on guys fancying them even though they don't return the feelings. It's like an ego boost. If she was a genuine friend she would be concerned for you and not want to hurt your feelings- maybe I've got her wrong after all I don't know her but think about it like this, if the shoe was on the other foot would you treat her as badly as she's treating you ? Let her come to you now but you need to think carefully if she is the type of 'friend' you want in your life.

Answer 4

I agree with carolann, if she really cares about you, she should understand, it sounds like she enjoys the attention & is playing hard0to-get, I think she's childish & selfish not u. Also, text her & say thank you for being my friend & I won't be calling/texing u you anymore becos you obviously don't want to know & I am not selfish or 2 faced, I just needed some time alone.if want to talk 2 me please contact me anytime.

Also don't let her have you round her little finger. She likes the attention you give her & is very rude of her to ignore you. That's not a respectful way to treat a friend.you have done nothing wrong & u should be hurt, not her.

Answer 5

First of all you should not have told her that you wanted to lose contact with her even for a while so you could get over your feelings for her. You just dropped two bombs on her by saying you don't want to see her and you want to change friendship to an acquaintance.

She telling you what she did was just a of saying, O.K., if that's the way you feel just piss off. Women are pretty domineering/jealous and she thought that you was wanting to see someone else. Face it, you blew it. Live with it and go on.

Answer 6

hello your Friend is doing what she was asked (by u) to do that is u were the one who asked her to stop contact first ,she did the one which u wished right but now u r blaming her this is not fair. however don't worry if she is for u then something would bring her back to u. i think it is only less chance for an end of friendship.
note one thing ladies are not doll or robot to do what u say OK she is a human she needs some time to think . i wish u good luck
i am not rude to u if u think so sorry than but i think i made u to think.

Answer 7

Ok, you WISH she fancied you and didn't tell you. The truth is, you wanted more from her than she wanted to give, and you still do. Leave it alone. She may come back but probably won't, but your continuing to ask makes it less likely that she will come back. People want what they cannot have. Don't be a pest.

Answer 8

yes, it must have hurt

since you were the one that said no contact,
she is not contacting or letting you contact her.
that is what you asked for in reality

She must have thought that you both were closer than you thought.

the friendship
was very genuine
you
broke something
that can not
be repaired
She must feel like YOU broke up the relationship, that You never cared about her.

yes, you are taking it wrong, you want a seperation and recieved a seperation,, you must have thought that she would be the one to try and keep in contact.

Answer 9

You don't just 'get over' your feelings.

She's probably enjoying her self over Christmas and New Year and doesn't need the added stress of your arguments.

Seeing as you are the one who originally ceased contact, you can't just pick and choose when contact starts up again - she probably can't be bothered with being messed about. It's not her fault you fancy her and she doesn't fancy you back.

Answer 10

If she wasn't a friend who could understand that we all need space sometimes, and she could be so upset as to call you names then not answer your texts/calls --- why are you bothered she isn't --- dust yourself off and get back on your track. Yesterday is history live each day one at a time.... best wishes for 2007