First I was his best friend, Then his girlfriend, then,now it feels like I'm nothing?

Question

This all took place in a matter of 4 days. While I was in Ireland, My best friend asked me out. He said that he wanted me to be his girlfriend and that he wanted me to live with him when I get back. I didn't tell him that I was coming home for a temporary visit for the holidays. I showed up a few days later. He was the first person I went to see when I got home. He seemed really excited and everything. We even kissed! Like a boyfriend and girlfriend. He took me out a few nights later. We didn't end up going to the movies like we were supposed to. So we just went out to eat. We stopped at a park, to talk. I kissed him, then he acted like I did something wrong and he took me home. For the next few days he hasn't called me, he hasn't really talked to me. He's been avoiding me. We finally hung out a week later, and he acts like I'm just someone he hangs out with every once in a while. What is his problem? He asked me out. He suggested I live with him. I just love him

Answer 1

some people are just weird..he probably changed his mind and decided not to tell you with words but with actions which is very stupid..then again i could be wrong.my advice is to talk to him and ask him..maybe he will open up and tell you whats wrong

Answer 2

I'm afraid you are going to have to love him as a friend again,because he has obviously, for some reason changed his mind about having a more intimate relationship with you.

What you really have to ask yourself is, if he hadn't approached you about becoming a "couple" would you ever have approached him?

I think you will have to back off and give him time to sort his feelings thoroughly, it will be hard because you will want to know the reason why he decided not to continue with the plans to move in together.But you will have to be patient if you ever want to know the reason,and hold onto your friendship if nothing else.

At least he didn't talk you into sleeping with him, because that would have ruined any chance of staying friends probably.
You are young and have years in front of you to find someone else and be happy, and you will find on that journey through life, that unfortunately it's full of disappointments, but we all learn to live with them and go on.

Good luck and try not to be too upset if things don't work out between you, and I hope at least you will manage to save your friendship,it's a prescious thing to share.

I think sadly for you, if you do really love him, that you are going to have to accept that he mistakenly took loving you and being in love with you the wrong way, and spoke before realising the difference.

Of course your pride will be hurt, but you will have to forgive him if you want to stay friends.

Answer 3

thats the problem when u become bf and gf with ur best friend. nothings ever the same again if u break up. maybe in the park, he wanted just to talk about something, like the pace of the relationship, but u didnt give him the chance. i suggest asking him why he's been acting like this and if there's anything u can do to help him out. if u never ask him, u will never kno. the sooner, the better

Answer 4

things have gone to fast too quickly. he may need time to think. give him space. don't call him, let him call you. i know its hard but do this please. then when he does, see what happens let him make the first moves. if he kisses you then you both need to talk. if he just wants to be friends then you got to ask yourself can you just be friends with him. years ago i was in a simular situation. for over a year i was best friends with my friend. he and i was always hanging out together. we go to pubs and clubs together and he would cook me roast dinner on a sunday. but then after year of being friends we started to have a sexual relationship. it did not feel right and i knew that we can never be just friends again because there is a old saying ' lovers cant be friends and friends cant be lovers' we split up after 6 weeks of having a sexual relationship together and then he would not speak to me. i lost the best friend i ever had.

Answer 5

Maybe he has had second throughts......and the whole girlfriend/boyfriend thing just doesn't feel right. This happened to my daughter recently when a close friend told her he has feelings for her. They went out a couple of times and kissed and he was really keen ~ even told her he loved her but she didn't feel the same way. She thought she liked him as she was attracted to him etc but it just wasn't happening. She had to be honest with herself and him. He didn't take it too well and their friendship may have suffered as a result. Sit down and chat to him and tell him how you are feeling.......ask him if his feelings for you have changed? he could be confused? something else may be bothering him? You NEED to chat to him and find out what's going on?

Answer 6

Boy.......this sounds like a guy a dated a couple years ago. We met..became best friends..became gf/bf..and a couple months later, he told me he wanted out. So my heart was broke..my self confidence tossed into the gutter and I spent the next year desparately hoping we'd get back together. We did and (guess what), it was even worse. He asked me to live with him..I said yes..and he forgot he asked the question.

it was bad news all around. i wish i would have remained friends with him.

Answer 7

That is a normal question. Girls, it seems that boys tend to get tired of you after a first date.Some want to go steady while some want to break up with you.Girls get really hurt. Next timme you must be careful with the boyfriends you choose.And don't do any thing to jeopardize your relationships.

Answer 8

i think that you should just confront him that's the only way your gonna find anything out. right now you are constantly thinking about what has happened so to relieve your mind just ask him a few questions.

Answer 9

what a jack he is! What I think is he's not worthy of being your boyfriend and your to special for him. he just can't handle you. So really all I say is you should go up to him and right in his face you should be like "smack that, oh what now!"

Answer 10

This sounds like a guy who is taking advantage of you, he wants a relationship on his terms. I know this is not what you want to hear, but my advise is, ditch him before you get hurt.