Okay well my mom never liked him when she heard his age.She even said she was gonna call the cops.She meet him and didn't like him.He's really outspoken about almost every topic.My mom got annoyed and said she didn't agree with his view points.
Now she hates him even more and always nags me about him if I wanna go spend time with him.Once time we were chatting on the phone and she cut the converstation short buy disconnecting the phone.The only reason she partly hates him is because he's 4 years older.
2007-01-01 04:40:19 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I'm 14 he's 4 years older.So he's 18 .
2007-01-01 04:45:56 · update #1
And I'm not breaking up with him.He makes me really happy .I think my mom got the wrong impression that he was rude.
2007-01-01 04:47:28 · update #2
He's outspoken and ver open minded.He hates close minded people and my mom was sorta being closeminded about homosexual marriage it got dragged in are conversation.Because the news was on and so yeah my mom and him kinda fighted.
2007-01-01 04:56:38 · update #3
I know how you feel with the older guys. Im 14 also and i have had my share of relationships but it's something about being with that older guy that is just amazing they seem like they understand and everything. And i'll admit ur mom is probably just being narrow minded but giver her some slack. You are 14 and dating practically an adult so she is probably just finding anything to be mad at him because he is dating her little girl. Just try and understand and if you love this guy and he loves you it will all work out
2007-01-01 07:24:40 · answer #1 · answered by Sexylova49 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
#1: Your mother's feelings are justified, but her approach is all wrong. She obviously doesn't know how to adequately communticate her feelings to you without you getting defensive, i.e. She's essentially pushing you, with her behavior, to see more of your boyfriend.
#2: At 14, you shouldn't be involved with legal age male majorities, anyway. You should be dating boys no older than 15. The mind changes quickly in the teen years, so dating an 18 yr old boy at 14 is inviting all kinds of advanced behavior that you, at 14, will not know how to deal with.
#3: How is your relationship with your father? Are he and your mother still together? Did you grow up with your father? Girls NEED their fathers in every way possible during this vulnerable age.
#4: Seems as though you don't have enough productive activities to fill your time outside of school. Typically, when teenagers are bored, they tend to fill their time by getting into "trouble", i.e. committing crime, getting pregnant, getting a girl pregnant, etc. Join a youth group, some type of organization. Get your mother involved in this. I am sure she would approve of this over the alternative which would be the potential of statutory rape, and even worse, teen pregnancy, which none of we taxpayers welcome.
#5 Your decision to date at such a young age screams so many things one cannot count. Talk to a professional. Join BigBrothersBigSisters and get a mentor. You need some positive role models in your life. Though your mother loves you and has a valid point, she's going about her "discipline" all wrong.
Tip: Have a mother/ daughter day each week. Go out on a date with your mom and dad, or just your mom, if your dad's not in the picture. She probably just wants a stronger relationship with you. Encourage this by telling her that you want to have at least one day a week alone with her just to do fun stuff together.
Besides, you're too young to love a guy. You're still a child.
I have a daughter not much younger than you and have already been talking to her about boys.
Good luck, Sweetie, and Peace!
2007-01-01 13:05:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry, but I think he's too old for you. I do not understand why an eighteen year old would be attracted to a fourteen year old. I don't have any problem with a four year age difference, except when it's with someone in their teens. You are just starting out with the whole relationship thing. You need to be with someone your own age who is on the same playing field. An eighteen year old has much more experience than a fourteen year old. I'm sure your mom is quite worried about him pressuring you to have sex. It sounds like the bf came on really strong with your mom and has lost all respect. This guy sounds very immature and needs to hang out with people his own age.
2007-01-01 13:06:31 · answer #3 · answered by Marty 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well that is dumb...you should be able to love/be with whoever you want. If he is harming you in any way then she has the right to not like him. Because she doesn't like his point of views and age...if he is treating you right and you are not getting used and being nieve, there should be no problem. Sometimes parents don't realize that they push there kids away by doing this.
Do you have a cell phone?...that may work.
Try talking calmly to her and let her know how you feel. She can prevent you from seeing him but your still going to sneak it....that's what they don't understand.
Good Luck!
2007-01-01 12:47:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Okay, so he's 4 years older. And if that means you're 17 and he's 21, your parents will NEVER like him. Trust me when I say this. My mother was 16 years old when I was born, and my father was 20. The only reason my grandparents didn't press statutory charges on my dad, was because my mother threatened to run away with me.
2007-01-01 12:45:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your mother is just concerned about you. I know it is impossible for you to understand right now, but you will one day. A boy that much older than you can get you into trouble depending on your age. If you are 13 and he is 17 that is a huge difference. He is probably much more experienced in things like sex, alcohol, marijuana, ect. No one will ever be good enough for her little girl. She isn't doing this to make you miserable, she is just worried about you. Talk to her and tell her that you respect her opinion, but that you are growing up and can choose your own friends. Try to act like a grown up, and more freedom will follow. She needs to be able to trust you. Keep your grades up. Good luck.
2007-01-01 13:40:00 · answer #6 · answered by Autumn 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
seriously ask your self, has your mom got a point? Her reasons could be valid, and you could just be blinded by "love" and not seeing the side to your boyfriend that your mom sees.
Being outspoken, in itself, is not a bad thing, but being outspoken just for the sake of looking big, and bolstering his own ego, is not cool, and displays a tendancy to dominate.
Being young, you will learn that relationships come and go, but you only get one mom - listen to her with respect and honesty, she may be right.
2007-01-01 12:52:11 · answer #7 · answered by Blake B 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i hate to say this but your mom has the right to be mad because it's iilegal for you to go out with him being that hes an adult and you are still under age. the best advice i can give you is to keep it on the low, i mean, you dont need everybody knowing about your relationship because if the cops found out, your boyfriend could very well go to jail.
2007-01-01 13:54:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
That depends, how old are you? If you're under the age of consent in your state, there's not much you or he can do, legally, also depending on where you live, the laws are different.
2007-01-01 12:44:39 · answer #9 · answered by Veridian 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
okay well to Amy that's not true I'm 15 and my parents love my bf who's 17
but i can see why shes jumpy about the age difference but just tell her you can't change the way you feel about him so you can stop trying just tell her how well he treats you
2007-01-01 13:01:51 · answer #10 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋