I asked a close female friend that we need to lose contact for awhile-so that I can get over my feelings for her.She said if thats how I feel,ok and that maybe we do need time apart.The conversation ended with an argument, with her calling me 2 faced and selfish.(asked her if she ever felt anything for me and for her to be truthful).We're close friends.
We've not spoken for a whole month.I have tried calling\txting(last 2 days) and have got no response from her.For christmas I sent a card saying how important the friendship is to me and how special she is.In the txt I wrote how stupid I behaved and I regret it,would do anything to make amends.
Why hasn't she responded to the missed calls\txts???Also the xmas card?
Could I have offended\hurt her really that much-how could I if she agreed to no contact?
Does this mean the friendship was never genuine?Will we speak again--or is she clearing her head?
I don't know what to think anymore?
2007-01-01 02:57:54 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
How long is the 'staying apart' last?I really want to get in touch.She wanted to remain friends-so I am respecting her wishes,no?I have delt with my feelings-so I'm ready to get back in contact
2007-01-01 03:11:32 · update #1
She said that we're only friends---could she have possibly had feelings for me?
2007-01-01 03:43:44 · update #2
I think you probably did hurt her feelings. If you two were close, then maybe she has feelings for you. I think she hasn't responded to your messages because she is afraid of getting hurt again. The friendship was real, she is just hurting. Give her some more time. Good luck.
2007-01-01 03:03:50 · answer #1 · answered by Deborah 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds that you were less tactful in breaking the news to her. Maybe you should have first found out how she feels about you and whether she had hopes of you taking your friendship to a higher level. On the other hand, she might have heeded your request to lose contact for a while.
I would advise that you should not push her further away by pestering her. You could send her a last message indicating that you would still be available for that friendship when she's ready. But honestly, you might have messed up big time and leave with the hurt. Just take a lesson from that experience!
2007-01-01 03:09:46 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
I think you sound great, and did the right thing.
She has obviously been shocked by your revelation, and didn't know how to deal with it.
whether it's because she wouldn't admit to herself that the feeling was mutual or whether it's because she felt betrayed remained to be seen.
But at least she did give you space and also has kept the upper hand when ended your friendship for now.
I would suggest to give her some space, and stop chasing after her.
You've done all you could and even more since you chose to be honest and even had the courage to disappear off the scene for a while.
Let her come back in her own time.
You didn't say if she were in a relationship. If she were and you did that, then she would have definitely felt betrayed and the feeling being mutual or not, she would have realized that she couldn't trust you.
So, whichever it is, let her come back in her own time, but well done to you.
You've got guts, I'll give that to you!!!xxx
2007-01-01 03:35:51 · answer #3 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't really want no contact, you wanted her to fall all over you and tell you not to leave her, didn't you? Your ploy was pretty transparent and shallow and manipulative. Until you own up to your sins, ask forgiveness, and agree to shape up, she's right to not respond to your messages. Friendship wasn't genuine on your part because it's a two-way street, give-and-take equally. I don't know whether it was genuine on her part. Friends don't not contact each other because one has feelings for the other they mutually agree on how to handle things..
2007-01-01 03:05:37 · answer #4 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done all you can. And to answer a few of your questions, no, cards, texting, and phone calls will never offend a friend. (A true friend). But, never the less, if she won't pick up what you dropped, keep on dropping more.
Best of luck - Luke -
2007-01-01 03:03:17 · answer #5 · answered by Luke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is not responding to any of the ways you have done trying to contact her,after all its been a few mouths since you split up, could be she has moved on with her life
2007-01-01 03:21:56 · answer #6 · answered by barnowl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she had strong feelings for you by the sound of it. Time is the best cure. Sorry but i have no other advice,hope you sort it out though as it seems you should be close friends.
2007-01-01 03:03:01 · answer #7 · answered by Mel26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably hurt her feelings. Maybe she had feelings for you and just didn't say so. All you can really do is wait for her to get over it and call you.
2007-01-01 03:00:41 · answer #8 · answered by dmstanley02 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
FOR REAL!you were a bit selfish but thanks for being a man and facing your mistakes and wanting to make things right.i think she just needs time,like you said.but try a letter, which is more personal and sincere..if your friendship was for real thenshe will cme around
2007-01-01 03:08:06 · answer #9 · answered by mazirudo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give her sometime to think about what she wants.You should then after about 1 week and text her again.She should then respond.Best Luck
2007-01-01 03:03:07 · answer #10 · answered by Sierra S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋