if i find out my boy friend is having an affair should i have one to get back at him?or just forget about it?
2006-12-31 19:15:57 · 39 answers · asked by louise b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can but it won't make you feel any better about him, you or what he did. If you find he's had an affair, your best bet is to give yourself a little time to think about it, then decide whether or not you wish to leave or stay and see if you two can repair it.
Edited to add: If you cheat on him your trust in future relationships will plummet. You'll likely get paranoid with future partners, unable to trust you or them.
Best of luck.
2006-12-31 19:17:10 · answer #1 · answered by acrobatic 3 · 3⤊ 3⤋
If you know for sure that your b/f is having an affair, do not stoop to his level by trying to get back at him-your relationship, like your self-esteem, will go nowhere. When you find out for sure-(the words "IF" i find out my boyfriend is having an affair".....suggests that you have no concrete evidence to the fact anyway, it suggests that you are not sure if he is faithfull to you, and that you are awaiting such an event)-then just leave him, up sticks and get out...be on your own for a while, then find a decent bloke-(or not, as the case may be)-but don't get bogged down with affairs and sleeping with different people for revenge and such, 'cos you won't feel any better.
2006-12-31 22:12:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm guessing that by calling him your boyfriend, there's an expectation of a singular commitment to each other. If that's the foundation of your relationship, and you expect to maintain some semblance of integrity - you should not 'get him back' by having an affair of your own, if you discover he has one. You should dump him, and consider that good riddance to bad rubbish. If, on the other hand, this relationship is based on a casual understanding of mutual attraction and both of you are not really committed to the idea of ever being swayed by another attractive, potential mate - by all means, play around just as much as he does and call him on it. Have a good relationship with your physician and look forward to many years of distrust and anxiety as you grow older, but - what the heck...
2006-12-31 19:25:51 · answer #3 · answered by Lonnie J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,i dont think sleeping with another man is the way of getting back at your boyfriend.
If your boyfriend has had an affair then the best thing for you to do is to walk away from him,if he can have sex with another woman and not give you a second thought or how this will effect you then he really has no feelings for you.
If you do have sex with another just to get back at him then really your no better than him
2006-12-31 20:31:09 · answer #4 · answered by freerange00720002000 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Two wrongs don't make a right. Drop him like a hot cake, that will teach him a lesson he will never forget. Don't degrade yourself just get on with your life and forget about him. Leopards never change their spots, and you should see it as once bitten twice shy. Helll i am on the ball this morning. Have a good day.:))))
2006-12-31 22:29:13 · answer #5 · answered by Duisend-poot 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouln't not have an affair cuz it makes u just as bad as him. Dont forget about it either. I would let him know that u know about it and see where it goes from there. Besides if u 2 stay 2gether this is something BIG u have over him.
2006-12-31 19:18:26 · answer #6 · answered by mcrystal107 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Don't go back! The reality is that if you take him back you are just saying that what he did was ok and almost giving him permission to do it again. The best thing you can do is walk, find someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve.
2006-12-31 19:52:42 · answer #7 · answered by jumpin_jelly_cat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you know. Tell him to choose - you or her. If he chooses her or hesitates, them you know that he's definately not the right guy for you. Don't have an affair just to get him back - it will haunt you later in life in later relationships. Just don't let yourself become his stepping stool - you are better than that and can find someone better.
2006-12-31 19:23:19 · answer #8 · answered by zalecyn 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
HEEELLLL ta da NAWWW!!!!!!
just cause he's a nasty bastard dosen't mean you have to lower your standards and be a skank too. I know it hurts and doing it would ease your pain but realize that you and your health are precious revenge is sweet but the best revenge is sucess. Show that jerk that you are a confident classy woman, go get your hair done, nails done, new out fit show him you don't need him, you just choose to have him around. your are precious and not a bus that everyone gets to ride. once he sees how condident and classy you are he'll wish he'd never looked in another brawds direction
2006-12-31 20:04:18 · answer #9 · answered by Chava 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know how the saying goes, Two Wrongs Don't Make A Right
2007-01-02 13:20:56 · answer #10 · answered by Sierra One 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋