2006-12-31 09:54:30 · 23 answers · asked by stevencaman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
should have been single
2006-12-31 09:58:45 · update #1
My mom was always a single mother it was hard for her to have relationships because when things got serious and the thought of moving in came to play, not many Men were up for the chalange of living with kids, that werent theirs, I belive in Marriage first anyway, but even then it has to be shock, to have no kids, then be a "parent" no wait "your not their father, dont dcipline my kids" role
2006-12-31 10:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by AntzaGurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Realizing that the BEST thing that you can do is get the hell out of that relationship!
There will ALWAYS be the child's Father in the mix. Whether you or she chooses to accept that... THAT child has a Father. YOU will only be a Dad, IF it goes that far.
If the mother doesn't allow or encourage the child's Father to be an EQUAL and ACTIVE part of the child's life, WITHOUT having to stoop for a child support check.... What makes you think thst YOUR GAME will go any better?
Wake up! The last guy isn't there for a reason. You think SHE is going to tell you the absolute truth as to WHAT the reason is?
See if she will accept you talking to the Father of her children. See if she will give you the divorce case court number so you can get a copy and study it.
I mean, you both DO purport to be grown-up and mature adults don't you?
Find out what cause her to break off a life long commitment to the last guy, afterall, they DID become married UNTIL DEATH DO THEY PART.... Seems to me neither of them held true to their commitment.
THAT is why God made MAN the HEAD OF THE HOUSE, so that wherever the man goes, so goes God's graces.
Feminism isn't going to support you or your commitment to this woman. God will. Best to get your answers from Him!
Without that, you think YOU are going to fare any better?
2006-12-31 18:15:35 · answer #2 · answered by gromeo747 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not being able to go out alot as you would if neither had children. I am a single father and I dated a girl with kids. It didn't bother me because I have a child too so I understood alot about the life of a parent. It's okay as long as you both make time to spend with each other even if it's at home with her or your house sometimes. Maybe think about hiring a babysitter once or twice a month if the baby isn't too young to be taken care of by another then you could have some time to go out too.
2006-12-31 17:58:40 · answer #3 · answered by kws504 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
getting her to listen, getting her to talk, getting her to be open with you (she should be if she wants you to be open with her), getting her child to like you, and getting her to do what she wants, instead of letting her be, her family's slave. I could probably tell you more, but that's the hardest parts of having a friendship or relationship with a single mother- especially if she's a dodo who wont do anything about her lack of knowledge and other things that bother her, and wont stop suppressing her memory. Also being third on her list of importance, while her family is first and her child is second. By all rights, the child should be first and her (the single mother's) family should be second or third. To put them before the child, is just wrong!
2006-12-31 18:11:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you can't really expect her to drop everything and go to a club or bar with you. My fiance luckily had done all his partying by the time I met him, and when we got serious, he wanted nothing else than to sit in front of the TV and just spend family time together. So you have to expect that from a single mom, but if you happen to meet a single mom who LOVES partying and clubbing, run as fast as you can away from her! That is a really bad sign and would probably explain why the father's gone.
2006-12-31 18:08:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you mean single mother?
I would think keeping your relationship with the mom. If the relationship gets serious it is important to not interfere with the mom's relationship with her children. You and the mom need to set boundaries towards your relationship with the children.
2006-12-31 17:57:53 · answer #6 · answered by kindness 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not hard if you love her. Think of all the sacrifices she has done for you when she was young and strong. Be thankful she is still around. You can tell her I love you everyday. I niss my Mom. She was bedridden for 5 years till she died at age 90 yrs old and we all miss her up to now. She was a very loving mother.
2006-12-31 18:20:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Realizing that you come after her kids in her list of priorities. This will be hard to do especially if you need as much looking after as the kids do(laundry, food, cleaning up after yourself). Plus, she is going to have a hard time trusting you since the last one let her down.
2006-12-31 18:00:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sharing her time with her child. I was a single working parent and the biggest problem I found was when my son wanted something when the man was there and the man acted more demanding than the child. It would ruin it for me every time. I would end it asap. I didn't want two kids.
2006-12-31 17:59:55 · answer #9 · answered by Nani 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Finding out that eventually you have to pay the bills for her little "mistake" and that only loser in this relantionship is you for being with a woman with baggage instead of being with ones that do not.
2006-12-31 18:09:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋