I'm currently going through a divorce. I'm in an emotional hell and i know thats normal. I'm a really nice guy and the holidays have been nothing but misserable for me. I'm so lonely. How long should i wait to pursue antother relationship? As far as my EX goes i really don't care anymore and i wish she would leave me alone and stop tormenting me. She never really loved me and just used me for my money and benefits because i'm a Marine. I don't wanna be alone anymore. I've been alone long enough. Should i pursue a relationship? Or should i wait?
2006-12-31 09:39:41 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sounds like you are ready to move on. some people don't understand that marrying a person in the military isn't hitting the jackpot!
2006-12-31 09:43:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wish we had a bit more details. Is she waiting to get on with a new relationship or has she ? Is that the reason for the divorce?.
I feel especially close to the military & I hold in high reguard our military people serving. I can't bear the thought of your being so lonely at the beginning of a new year. I am married to a retired U.S military man and I know the heartbreaK of my brothers marriage when he was fighting on the front lines during WW2 and his wife ran off with their 3 babies, 1,2,and 3yrs. old to be with her first cousin. as man and wife. I see no need for you to wait. I think you should not rush but go out tonight at least since it is New Years Eve and kiss some decent female at midnight even if she reminds you of your Mother, and I certainly that is a pleasant thought. Go put your self in a crowd. If you are a christian and a southern baptist or simular go to the church and see the New Year come in at midnight. That is a special place, you all have a common goal. Go for it and I will too! I'll be praying for your peace and happiness in 2007. Happy New Year !!!
2006-12-31 11:05:01 · answer #2 · answered by Jill ❤'s U.S.A 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone is different so that waiting period will vary from person to person. If its too short for you,once you start dating again youll soon know. Theres no time frame for how long one should wait so all you can do is trust those internal instincts which I know every marine has and go from there. Dont be afraid to admit to a new date that it is really too soon, as shell understand. Try it and if it doesnt work, back off and wait a little longer. Good luck and have a fantastic new year, and thank you and your buddies for making this a better and safe place for my grandson to grow up in and be safe
2006-12-31 09:52:20 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've heard that you should allow yourself three months for each year you were in a relationship before seeking out another. So, for instance, if you and the ex were together for two years, allow six months.
I also can empathize with the wanting another relationship--we're social creatures, after all, and most of us aren't cut out for the life of a hermit. Just don't try to rush it.
When I was recovering from a disastrous first marriage, I was wailing to one of my older sisters about the loneliness and how would I ever know if I'd ever meet another person, and she told me very simply, "You'll know. Believe me, when it's right, no one will have to tell you." She was right.
I wish you healing and happiness for the new year.
2006-12-31 09:52:44 · answer #4 · answered by Chrispy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think anyone wants to be alone and lonely, and I'm sure you are hurting, but when you are in this state, making big decisions isn't probably the best idea right now. Going out on dates and hanging out with friends is probably good, but searching for something meaningful right now when you are feeling so lonely might actually lead you to pick another crappy girl, and you really don't want to do that.
2006-12-31 09:49:03 · answer #5 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The more people you meet, the better it is for you. It's not necessary to get into a serious relationship right now, but go out there, wipe that angry expression off your face and try and relax, have a good time. Go out with friends, join dating sites, do all you can to move on. You will feel better, it takes time.
Good luck, happy new year.
2006-12-31 09:48:59 · answer #6 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do think you should wait till the divorce is over before starting something new. Give yourself a chance to mend, be mad, be over it. Some baggage is always brought to relationships, don't add to the bundle. Your a great guy with alot to offer. Get your sense of humor back, its very attractive to women. Be the whole package, then get out there and find a great girl. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
2006-12-31 10:20:18 · answer #7 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should call a friend, invite him or her over tonight, have few drinks (don't drink and drive though) and toast yourself and 2007 at midnight and resolve that this year (2007), you will make some new girl very lucky this year by having you in her life. Tomorrow, start the hunt for that new girl!
Good Luck!
2006-12-31 09:47:10 · answer #8 · answered by kathylouisehall 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not wrong to date now.....The heart heals itself and it seems you left your marriage along time ago, maybe she too! If your interested in dating now, go for it! But to be fair to the women your dating you should be divorced first you dont want to start a new relationship, on not so good terms. Just be fair to someone else!
2006-12-31 09:47:48 · answer #9 · answered by JDream 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
better to wait until you feel comfortable in your own skin,,any damage you feel from this situation will be transferred on to the next women unintentionally,,find peace and then move on happier and more like your old self,,you could meet mrs perfect and still miss her because your heart is cloudy and judgmental.good luck
2006-12-31 09:59:12 · answer #10 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋