Ok. Here is the deal. We are both very very different but she is always trying to compete against me for the love, attention, etc. of my mother and father in law, they have realized this (which calms me to a certain extent). I have tried to be her friend and when we are alone she acts like a normal human being, but when everyone else is present she starts to try to outshadow me and it sucks, she even had to get the present I got for Christmas from my inlaws because she got extremely jealous. What would you do in such a situation? Any advice from someone who has lived a similar situation is greatly appreciated.
2006-12-31 07:14:37 · 10 answers · asked by White 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Inlaws bought us different gifts (cause we are different), she liked the one I got and had her husband buy it for her.
2006-12-31 07:30:57 · update #1
Let it go- she will show her own colors (she obviously already is). Handle yourself with grace and dignity when she is around and have pity on her- she must be incredibly insecure to act this way. Don't lower yourself to her level by doing anything- just be yourself and all will be well.
2006-12-31 07:22:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She sounds messed up. Try to sit down with her and have a talk. Be honest and tell her how you feel. Ask questions that are unanswered. Tell your in laws what you are going to do. They sound support of you but, did they buy her the same gift as you? If so that is only making the matter worse. She seems to be a manipulitive. Watch your back. Good luck in this matter.
2006-12-31 07:23:48 · answer #2 · answered by Rosa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First don't let her know what you bought for people, second just tell her we are family no need to compete with each other. If she still had a problem blow her off. Everyone eventually sees what people truly are in the end.
2006-12-31 07:26:48 · answer #3 · answered by c_schreel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she wants to be just like u, emulation is the most sincere for of flattery. she is insecure, and sees u as the better person, so she has the need to feel bigger and better and want everything u have. just deal with her the best u can to keep the peace in the family, if u can't limit being around her. she is jealous of u.if she can overshadow u she feels more secure.
2006-12-31 10:44:27 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is aware that's she's getting to you, you do know that right? I say show her how confident you are with your marriage and extended family and that no matter how she "wags her tail" for attention YOU don't care. If she's new to the family and comes from a dysfunctional one, I say have a little compassion, but stand your ground and don't let her knock your self-esteem to the floor b/c of it. It will be okay. :)
2006-12-31 07:22:58 · answer #5 · answered by Hear2Help 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
properly i think of which you're treating her as an intruder, and which you ought to be seeing issues a splash out of context with reference to her "outshadowing" you shes in all possibility with the aid of fact that shes have been given alot to "stay as much as" fantastically in case you and your inlaws are as close as you're making it. supply it time, and dont enable her get to you, you're in simple terms being somewhat insecure, dont take it for my area everybody has those moments, yet in simple terms like an in basic terms new child, in some situations you receive to make room for a sparkling member of the kin.
2016-10-06 06:32:10 · answer #6 · answered by cosco 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore her now. Or it will compound when you both have children. Life is not about competition. Enjoy what you have with your family. Do not be a part of hers. Should she continue her way of life, she will undoubtedly wind up divorced and in a looney bin. Do NOT allow her to influence who you are. ;)
2006-12-31 07:58:58 · answer #7 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its really not up to you to point out her behavior. The family knows and sees it. Why waste energy on something that you cant change. She is who she is. So continue to be yourself. You have nothing to prove. Stop trying to be her friend, let her try to be yours.
2006-12-31 07:27:44 · answer #8 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore her. She's insecure and wants everyone to like her better than you. She's the one that looks like a fool in front of everyone.
2006-12-31 07:19:18 · answer #9 · answered by mamabear 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just ignore her! Stop worrying about her she's really not worth your time!
2006-12-31 07:19:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋