It;s wierd I'm really shy to make friends so I just avoid social situations and be by myself but sometimes I really want them as friends but I'm too shy and other times it's like a wierd pride or something, but it's wierd, because I'm not proud, I have no self-confidence. Maybe it's a defense mechanism or something.
2006-12-31 06:47:22 · 20 answers · asked by leena 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
u are not proud but kinda shy so i think u should boost up ur self esteem and courage cuz making friends would most definatly make u happy
2006-12-31 07:04:43 · answer #1 · answered by chilli sause 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter had the same problem. She was just too shy. Start by just trying to be more friendly. Smile when you walk by to people, say Hi! When you don't feel like it. When people approach, talk to them. If the conversations seems awkward, just start talking about music, or movies, etc. My daughter is shy, but she also has low confidence to a degree. I have been working with her, and she's gotten alot better. Know who you are, everyone is special in their own way. Pretty or skinny doesn't make you better than someone else. You know your strengths, feel proud of that. Some people are good in math / school, some in cheer leading, some are excellent writers, etc. You have to like yourself before anyone else will like you. If you can't find anything you like about yourself - then fake it. Walk with your head high. You would be surprised what even a little bit of "fake" confidence will do for you.
2006-12-31 14:56:07 · answer #2 · answered by 2mom35 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through that in high school. Mine was a defense mechanism because I was always afraid of people stabbing me in the back or just acting like they wanted to be friends but really did not like me. I was afraid to let anybody get close. My advice is to go ahead and be brave...talk to those people TRY to be their friend, if they don't want you to then you are no worse of then where you started. You only live once and the way to live is to sometime put yourself out there which sometimes involves getting hurt but who knows things could work out really well for you.
2006-12-31 14:55:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling. I used to be just like you described. Now, I'm kinda Jekyl and Hyde. I can be the life of the party, and, at other times, I withdraw within myself. Sometimes it can be a defense mechanism, but it may just be you're a person who enjoys her privacy. Nothing wrong with that.
2006-12-31 14:51:06 · answer #4 · answered by rhino 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
all u have to do is learn to socialize with different type of people and u will see how easy it is to make friends, remember people will want to be you friend for different reason so be careful how u choose them.Having no self confidence can be the biggest problem and never think that of yourself, u need to start thinking positive about yourself and u will be surprise at the things u can do ,all the best
2006-12-31 15:07:20 · answer #5 · answered by leecy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I sort of have the same problem. I have a really great group of friends, but not many friends outside the group. When put in social situations, I am either very shy (to the extent that I seem rude) or I am loud and annoying, and in reality, I am not either of those people. So to answer your question, yes, I have had that happen to me.
2006-12-31 14:53:08 · answer #6 · answered by meghanhappy 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The best solution is to try to be more social, start doing sports, activities, etc so you have more interaction with people, eventually you won't feel uncomfortable and will be really social :) Cause if you wouldn't want to change that you wouldn't have posted your comment. Good luck!
2006-12-31 14:50:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes it feels weird but very normal. it'll get better the more you try to be more verbal when you are around friends or so called friends .don't let your guard down fully until you think its time ,and believe me you'll know.don't push people away that you call friends ,because if they are truly friends they'll be there when you need them most ,so be cool be brave and just open up to people more you never know you just might find someone you really like.
2006-12-31 14:59:18 · answer #8 · answered by Phillip M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. I'm just as shy as you are.
i just went into a new school this year.
it was terrible.
no one ever talked to me.
except this one girl.
she saw me that i needed help with my schedule, and she helped from then on we were best friends.
but now i have alot of friends.
you need to act like yourself.
if the girl/boys you want to be friends with act very mean or for girl really preppy, don't change for them.
be yourself.
you'll get alot more friends like that.
2006-12-31 14:52:37 · answer #9 · answered by N!V3A Ü 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sit down in a peaceful place and note down the causes of your less self esteem and try to solve them regularly , gradually with a faith that you can do that. This will help you.
2006-12-31 14:54:58 · answer #10 · answered by Pramod 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋