My husband left me and our 8 month unborn child last month, Most of the leaving due to his fault, He is being very selfish and trying to go back to his single ways. what do you suggest is the best way to get back at him for leaving?
2006-12-31 06:02:31 · 20 answers · asked by I♥Karma 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are such the martyr.
I answered a couple days ago that he was probably tired of hormone caused grief. Now you are back and still think its all him. Weren't you the same one who called him friggin stupid and dumb? Now you are interested in getting back at him for not putting up with your attitude.
My response was this and remains, That you are most likely operating from a pregnancy induced anger. You show little or no respect for him. He left. When you consider that he might come back when you lighten up you can forge onward to a life without him or one where he has a chance to be with you.
Try this. Admit that some of this is your doing as well. Realize you are not the perfect one and are playing some kind of martyr game. Quit trying to be spiteful and pay him back for having enough.
Then you might be able to go to the delivery with a partner and a father for the kid.
Right now you are making this all about you. Your attitude is one of total disrespect and spitefulness. Its obviously not serving you well.
2006-12-31 06:20:53 · answer #1 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take care of you and the baby first, file for a divorce, get child support and if possible spousal support.
Move closer to your family and try and get their support and help. Find a job, go back to school, buy a house and look after the baby and find someone else who is worthy.
If you can accomplish all this by yourself that is the true way to get back at him. Anything else is just boosting his ego and tells him you have feelings for him still and would welcome him back in a flash (more affairs, std's etc.).
Love and marriage are based on trust and respect, you can't have one without the other, to play his game there is always a loser, don't let it be you.
2006-12-31 06:17:00 · answer #2 · answered by trojan 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have a baby on the way, think about that and not spite, you are going to want a life , the child will want and need its father, spite will make that hard or impossible. Be a mature person use your head and keep it civil. men that are not mad are quicker to pay the child support
2006-12-31 06:20:27 · answer #3 · answered by loveamouse7767 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it has been said that living well is the best revenge. i think it would be misplaced priority to focus on getting him back. it's not worth wasting good effort on a bad person. instead, pay attention to the good you have in your life...a child coming into this world. that child will need positive role models, not negative ones. don't waste your life away trying to counteract someone else's bad behavior. live well, love well, parent well, and all of the losses will be his.
2006-12-31 07:44:42 · answer #4 · answered by The Beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are about to have a baby. Getting even is not where your head should be right now. Making a life for you and your child is where it needs to be. Be glad he showed his true colors now and move on with your life.
You have a child to raise girl, make that your first priority not getting even with him. Let him go and be glad he left now before he made a negative impact on the childs life.
2006-12-31 06:13:21 · answer #5 · answered by just_trump_my_ace 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't get even. Get one up. Start with a lawyer, and child support. He MUST pay child support, even if he wants to be single again. He is half responsible for that child (it takes two to make one!) and he MUST support the child until it becomes of age. Get an attorney, file for support, and file for divorce. Believe me, you hit him in the wallet, you hurt him as bad as you can!
2006-12-31 06:05:42 · answer #6 · answered by Baby'sMom 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
the best revenge is just living a happy life and enjoying it to its fullest. Trying to get back at him is an immature thing to do and you'll be the better person for not doing it.
2006-12-31 06:34:06 · answer #7 · answered by Jem 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldnt worry so much about how to get back at him, thats a waste of time and energy, hes a loser for leaving you and a baby, now you should just concentrate on the child and whats best for you and it. look for a more secure partner, then, if the baby is his nail him with child support thatll rattle his cage.
2006-12-31 06:12:47 · answer #8 · answered by jelandjer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand that him leaving is a loss to you but the best way to get back at him is to move on and get a Real Man, hopefully one that isn't an immature ******.
2006-12-31 06:07:40 · answer #9 · answered by bashfulstranger 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He has every right under the constitution to do this. Give him a divorce and leave it at that. If you truly love someone, you will set them free, if they return, then they are yours to keep..... until it happens again.
2006-12-31 06:07:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋